Page 106 of The Casanova Complex

“You, Merritt. That’s what I was thinking about. Okay?” His voice cracks slightly, and he shakes his head, breathing hard. “All I was thinking about is that you are not his, you are fucking mine!”

I freeze, and my breath catches in my chest as I force a swallow down my throat past the tightness. The way that he says it doesn’t seem like…

“This is… this is fake, Bennett. We said that we⁠—”

My words are cut off when he closes the distance between us, the heat of his body washing over me when he presses against me and shakes his head. “No, the fuck it’s not. Look at me right now and tell me that you don’t feel it. This is not fake to me. In fact, I don’t think anything in my life has ever felt as real as this. As important as this. You are the most real thing in my life, Merritt. Don’t you see that I’m crazy about you?” He chuckles softly and reaches up, sliding his hand along my jaw and sweeping his thumb tenderly over my cheekbone. My heart is beating so hard that I can hear it in my ears, an oddly comforting, steady woosh.

“Things between us may have started as fake. But this is no longer about my superstitions or pissing off your ex, and honestly, it hasn’t been for me, for a while. I like you. I really fucking like you. I like everything about you. I like when you’re giving me shit.” A laugh pushes past my lips, and he grins. “Actually, I fucking love it. I love when you’re bratty, and you have an attitude like you’re six foot four and invincible. I love that you don’t back down. That in the face of shit that scares you, you lift your chin higher and are ready to take on the world. And underneath that armor that you wear so proudly, you are actually soft and squishy.”

“Hey.” I swat at his chest, laughing. “Not true.”

“Baby, it is so fucking true, and it’s one of the things that I love about you,” he murmurs. His fingers that are pressed against my lower back, holding me tightly to him, absentmindedly sweep back and forth, and emotion has my chest pulling tight.

At how safe and seen I feel right now.

“I wanted to tell you before now, but honestly… I was fucking scared.” His throat bobs as he swallows, shaking his head. “At first, I was scared that I was doing the same thing I’ve always done. Chasing after something because I loved the thrill of it. Chasing after something because I wanted to feel wanted, to be fulfilled with something inside of me that I couldn’t do on my own. I was worried that it was just the same pattern, and I didn’t want it to be. But the more I got to know you, and the more time we spent together, I realized that what I feel for you… it’s real. I was just scared that you wouldn’t feel the same way. That you’d run in the opposite direction. And when I think about it, that terrifies me. Because this is the first time in my life that anyone has meant something more to me.”

Oh God.

My eyes bounce between his as his hand rubs slowly up and down my back, his thumb sweeping with the same motion.

He doesn’t push me to say anything back, giving me a moment to let his revelation sink in, my hyperactive brain moving on overdrive.

Bennett wants to be with me.

Really be with me.

And I’m surprised to realize there’s no hesitation inside of me… because I want him too.

If he would’ve said this to me a month ago, despite my attraction to him and my feelings simmering just beneath the surface, he’s right… I would’ve run.

Because a month ago I didn’t fully know the man standing in front of me. I knew who I thought he was. I didn’t know him as the kind, thoughtful, sweet guy he actually is, a man who constantly goes out of his way to take care of me. A man who seems to just get me. A man who, despite being soft in all the perfect places, also has the filthiest mouth and can light this fire inside of me like no one else ever has.

That’s who’s standing here right now.

This man who almost put everything on the line because of someone touching and disrespecting me.

Even though I could throttle him for it.

I push down the thick ball of emotion weighing heavily in my throat and give him a small smile. “What are you asking me, Goalie?”

His lip tugs up into a grin, and he leans closer, dropping his forehead to mine for the briefest moment, rubbing his nose gently along mine.

Why is that so sexy and so sweet at the same time?

“I’m asking you to be my girl. For real this time. I want to date you. I wanna take you to the movies. Even though you’re probably going to force me into a scary-as-shit movie that I’ll hate, but I’ll do it because I don’t even care if I can be wherever you are. I want to take you to Jack’s Pizza and share extra-cheesy pizza. I want you to come to my games. I want to look up in the stands and see you sitting there next to Elliott and your dad or with your girls, wearing a jersey with my name on your back. I want to come home after being gone for away games and crawl into bed next to you. I want to celebrate when you get into law school and be the one who keeps you fed and focused when you’ve been studying for hours. I want whatever the hell you’ll give me, baby. I just want you. That’s all I fucking want… you.”

I can see it in my head as he says it, and my heart is melting.

I never saw Bennett coming, but now I can’t even picture what my life would be like without him in it.

“I want you too,” I whisper, and he pulls back to stare at me.

His eyes widen in disbelief. “You do?”

“Of course, I do. I mean… yeah, I am a little nervous. But it’s not because of you. Because… I’ve been hurt in the past, and my heart doesn’t forget it. But if there is anything I know, Bennett, it’s that you’re worth the risk. I know who you are. You’re the guy who makes me laugh, who sees me for who I really am, even the not-so-beautiful parts. The guy who makes me feel safe and secure, and the guy who I love to be with. You’re that guy, and that’s all that matters to me.”

His face softens, relief flooding it, and it dawns on me that he truly was worried that I wouldn’t feel the same way. Apparently, I’m even better at hiding my emotions than I thought.