Page 99 of The Best I Never Had

She rubs her hand over her mouth like she’s trying to stop the flow of words, but there’s no dam in the world strong enough to hold back the flow of her feelings now. “This whole week has been about you. Ellises left and right asking if I know what happened between you and Owen. Cousins brainstorming ways to push you together. Everyone trying to show you that you’re admired and how much they want you in the family. Meanwhile, I—the person who wants to join the family—am ignored and pushed to the side, until I get looped in with you for the shit you’ve pulled. You didn’t try to avoid something with him. You chose him, over and over.”

“I didn’t think it would—”

“Would what? Turn into this?” She gestures around herself. “But you knew it could. You knew how Diana would react if she found out, and you still chose your own pleasure over me. God, you’re just like our mother, making the selfish choice because you care more about feeling good for a moment than my long-term happiness.”

Her words land like the blows of a boxer who got the upper hand in a match, pummeling the opponent with one fist after another until they’re left bleeding out on the floor of the ring.

“Why does no one I love choose me?” Her voice breaks on the words. “What did I do in a past life to earn me a family who doesn’t think I’m worth protecting?”

“I’m sorry,” I say, my voice weak.

She swipes at her tears. “Just go.”

“Addy, plea—”

“I said fucking go,” she yells, and I flinch away from her.

I nod as I blink back my tears, turning away before she can see them. I’ve caused enough damage, and she doesn’t need to be subjected to my messy emotions, too.

I’m numb by the time I reach my room. Vaughn’s leaning against the wall with his suitcase in hand. “The pregnant one wouldn’t give me a key. Said she wasn’t letting some creepy-ass man into her friend’s room. Nice that you made a friend.”

“I don’t have the energy, Vaughn.” I swipe the key without looking at him.

He follows me inside. “You sounded like you needed me. I’m sorry if I made it worse.”

I grab my bag and start throwing things in without paying attention to what’s going where.

“What are you doing?” he asks. “You’re not running away.”

“No, Addy asked me to leave.”

“You can’t leave,” Vaughn says, flipping the suitcase closed. “Thee, come on. Emotions are high. Let’s just give it the night.”

I would, except she’s finally let out all those feelings she’s kept hidden. Waiting would only give her time to feel guilty.

“Please don’t make this into an argument,” I say. “I have to go.”

He rolls his lips together, then sighs, flipping my suitcase open again. Without asking, he packs up my bag, refolding the things I haphazardly threw in and gathering everything else around the room, and I feel a pang of gratitude for him. While I wait, I realize there’s one more thing I need to do before I leave. I sit at the beautiful desk, pull over the little notepad and pen, and start writing.

I make it through three pages before I feel content, folding them over on top of each other. “I’ll be back in a couple minutes.”

Vaughn opens his mouth to speak, then thinks better of it. I leave without giving him a chance to change his mind, heading a floor down until I find the room I’m looking for. I knock. And wait. I knock again, and again, and again, until the door swings open to reveal a scowling Diana.

“What do you want?”

I hold out the folded sheets of paper to her. “To give you an explanation.”

“I don’t need anything from you.”

“Just read the fucking letter, Diana,” I snap, and her skin turns a deep shade of red. “I get it. You hate me, and honestly, the feeling’s pretty mutual. You’ve been horrible to the most important people in my life, but for some reason, they still want a relationship with you. So read the letter. Addy doesn’t deserve to suffer for my mistakes, and Harrison deserves a future with the woman he loves.”

She eyes the papers like a snake she expects to strike at any moment. After a full minute, Diana reaches out to take them. Her eyes are steely, but she tucks the pages into the pocket of her fluffy robe.

I nod and leave. That fifteen-second interaction drained the last bit of fight from me. The warm hallways of the inn that felt so homey the past few days now feel heavy, like the walls are going to cave in and crush me at any second. My door is in sight when Owen’s voice calls out from behind me. I consider slipping into my room and pretending I didn’t hear him, but he doesn’t deserve that from me.

He wraps his arms around me, and I let him. The damage is already done. What’s one last hug?

Owen pulls back, placing his hands on either side of my neck just like he did a few hours earlier, but it’s not the same. There’s no thrill at the contact, no tingling of my skin or racing of my heart. I’ve gone numb.