Page 14 of Session 25

“Belinda, this ain’t-” the nurse cut me off by asking about the test for the baby again. “Just do what you gotta do yo.” At that moment, I regretted ever stepping foot in the hospital. Stacey knew exactly what she was doing when she called me. Her face showed no remorse.

Vexed, I turned away from Belinda and Stacey. What I heard next caused me to lose my cool.

“Koi this nigga got Rika pregnant.” Was the last thing she had said before my hands wrapped around Belinda’s neck.

“Sir, let her go!” Someone tried to pry my hands from her neck. “Sir, they will arrest you, please!”

By now it was too late; security was pulling me off Belinda. My chest was heaving up and down as I looked at her. “You’re fucked! You’re fucking fucked!”

The security guard led me away and out of the hospital. “If you don’t leave now, I’ll call the cops and have you arrested or you can go, but you not going back in that hospital!”

Playing with fire tonight wasn’t the move. Koi had already hit my line a few times and sent texts. My relationship was hanging on by a thread. The nurse and Stacey had betrayed me. While I didn’t have time to get my story straight, I took it on the chin and figured that all this shit would blow over in a day or two.

“Whatever yo. I got a relationship to save.”

Marcel’s latest stunt had a bitch trippin’ the fuck out. Belinda calling me was inevitable, given the circumstances, but dropping the bomb on me that she did had me screaming through my condo like a madman.

The cheating was something my stupid ass had put up with, but a baby and with my little cousin was where I drew the line. Go figure, it took something this wild for me to now feel like I was shorting myself. And then the nigga had the nerve to ignore my calls and texts.

“Little small head ass bitch!” I mumbled to no one as I pulled clothing out of our walk-in closet. What I planned to do next hadn’t crossed my mind, but I knew I had to get my hands on Marcel sooner than later. “Argh,” I stomped towards my phone, tapping on my best friend's name forcibly while I tried to steady my breathing.

“It better be an emergency at this time,” she snickered.

“This muthafucka got Rika pregnant, my Rika! My fucking cousin!” The gasp she released made me regret letting the truth roll off my tongue. It sounded worse hearing it out loud.

“Bitch what? Where the fuck is he? I’m coming to kick his big ass!” She yelled into the line. I could hear the shuffling on the other end of the line.

“Do not do anything until I get there,” she groaned. “Stupid piece of shit! I told you to leave his ass years ago, Koi Malone!”

I already knew telling Marli was going to set her off and make me feel worse than I already had been, but she had to know. She was my road dog, and there was no way I was going to be able to get through this alone.

Marli was the friend that was going to be madder than you in crazy situations. She was who I normally called last.

“Fine, but what the fuck? This nigga really had me bamboozled.”

“No, he didn’t. He had ya’ ass dickmatized, but baby girl, I hope this is the wake up call you needed. Shit, at least it’s a baby and not a disease, one you can’t get rid of.” Malice laced her voice.

“I hear you. Hurry up before I turn this bottle the fuck up! I am so fucking livid,” I was rambling more to myself than to Marli. She just let me vent until I told her that I needed to clean up this shit in my room.

Marli made me promise that I wouldn’t do anything stupid. Not in my right mind, I told her I wouldn’t just to get her off the phone faster. And when I heard the familiar sound of metal clinking together, I grabbed a kitchen knife, arms folded over my chest with a bonnet on my head, standing with the meanest mug I could muster up.

Marcel walked in swiftly until he noticed me standing there. “Baby.” He lifted his hands in the air. “Let me-”

“Nigga if you even fix your mouth to say let me explain, I will toss this knife right at the center of your fucking head since that’s the head you don’t use!”

“Koi, baby, please,” he pleaded. “Put the knife down and talk to me. Violence isn’t going to solve anything.”

“You right, it won’t solve anything, but it will make me feel better.” I ran my tongue over my teeth. “Seeing you hurt like you’ve hurt me for all these years will be satisfying, temporarily, but I will feel better,” I gritted my teeth, never moving the knife. “So, since you want to talk, I got one question. Depending on your answer, you decide your fate, my nigga!”

“Ask, just please…” I moved the knife slowly from my chest to my neck, swiping it across, silencing him. The way he stood still, eyes widened, chest rising slowly and hands now at his sides, I knew I had his ass right where I wanted him. Terrified.

“Why the fuck it had to be Rika?”

“Baby, honestly, it wasn’t like that.” Before he could get the next word out, I lifted my hand, flinging the knife over his head, causing him to duck down, dropping to the floor in a panic.

“You’re lucky my therapist told me to not let your bullshit take me there.” I clenched my jaw, tears welling up in my eyes. “Get the fuck out and do not come back! You and I are done! A baby!” I began to shake from the betrayal. “I lost our child a year ago but instead of comforting me, you were fucking my busted, broke ass cousin! That loose pussy bitch?” I questioned. “Yea,” I paced back and forth. “Yea, you’re done and if you don’t leave right now, I may commit murder.”

“Koi, you gotta believe me.” Hearing him say my name set off a fire inside of me. I leaped across the room in his direction, fist balled, punching him wherever I found an opening. The tears built up as pain and sweat from overexerting myself only made me want to hurt him more.