Page 18 of Substitute Bride

She shifted slightly. “I guess. Guys just never seem interested in me. I guess I’m not exactly what most men are looking for.”

She didn’t sound discontent or unhappy. She sounded resigned as if she believed and accepted that truth about herself.

James couldn’t understand it. She was beautiful and sweet and understanding and intelligent and mature, and she seemed to care about the things that were most important.

She was a little shy and reserved, so maybe she’d never put herself out there. If she had, some man would have snapped her up a long time ago.

It was just as well that no one had though. If she was married, she couldn’t have been his girls’ nanny, and she would never have been in his life.

James wouldn’t have liked that at all.

4

Rose tried not to be happy about James’s broken engagement.

She tried very, very hard.

She wasn’t entirely successful though.

She was so unsuccessful that she actually dreamed about him that night. She couldn’t remember details, but just before she woke up, she had a vague awareness of images of his face, his eyes, his broad shoulders, and the sense of how he felt—his warmth, his strength, his distinct presence. She woke up flushed, her blood racing in excitement, and she strained to bring the dream back to her, wanting to relish in it before full consciousness dragged her back to her senses.

It was hopeless. The dream was gone. She stared up at the plaster curlicues on her ceiling and reminded herself that James wasn’t hers and would never be hers that way.

She told herself these feelings were normal and natural. Maybe any woman would feel the same way in her situation—grow too attached to her employer when the situation felt so domestic.

But it wasn’t domestic. It was strictly professional. She gave herself a firm lecture on all those truths before she rolled out of bed just before her alarm went off at six thirty.

James might have dumped his snotty girlfriend, but that didn’t mean he was available for Rose.

Hands off. Eyes off. Thoughts off.

That would be her motto for the day.

She only managed to fulfill one part of her motto by the time James came home after work that evening. She hadn’t touched him at all, but her eyes and thoughts weren’t quite so controlled even with the benefit of his having been absent from the house for most of the day.

James had told her that he was going to be back as early as possible that evening so he could have dinner with the girls and talk to them about Genevieve and the fact that he was no longer engaged. They didn’t have time to talk during their always rushed breakfast, and he wanted to make sure to answer any questions or concerns the girls had.

Rose was touched by the thought, and she was pleased when he arrived at the house at barely five thirty, when he normally didn’t get back from work until well after six.

The girls were excited to see him, and even more excited when they saw that he had brought pizza with him.

“Can we eat in the family room?” Jill asked, having claimed the box of cheese pizza from her father and clearly looking for a place to set it down. “We don’t need forks and stuff for pizza.”

The family normally ate in the dining room, with no phones, televisions, or interruptions. Rose had always thought it was a wise, old-fashioned routine since it ensured they really talked to each other.

She could see James hesitate at his daughter’s question.

Finally he said, “We can eat in there, but no TV.”

“Okay!” Jill agreed.

“Yay!” Julie cheered, trying to grab an edge of the box so she could help her sister carry the pizza into the family room.

Rose gathered up napkins and bottles of water, but she gave James a sidelong glance before she followed the girls. “I can eat in the kitchen if you’d like,” she said softly, making sure to convey no particular feeling in the words. “You’ll want to talk to them in private, I imagine.”

James blinked. He always looked tired at the end of the day, and he always needed to shave, but he looked more tired and bristly than normal with his tie pulled loose and faint shadows under his eyes.

She wondered if he’d slept at all in the past two nights.