Page 140 of Saving Forever with the Hockey Captain

I nod. "He looked lonely."

"Yes."

She smiles. "I bet he doesn't anymore."

I think about Jamie laughing with volunteers, checking on teenagers during therapy, remembering birthdays, making everyone around him feel important.

"No." I smile. "He doesn't."

Keisha's eyes stay on mine. "I don't think either of you do."

My throat tightens. For the first time all evening neither of us has anything to laugh about.

Finally, Keisha reaches for her mug.

"Annette..." Her voice is gentle. "Sometimes we spend so much time helping other people heal..." She pauses. "...that we forget we're allowed to hope for our own happiness too."

I blink hard. "I'm not even sure what that looks like."

"You don't have to know." She smiles. "You just have to stop pretending you don't want it."

Neither of us speaks for several moments. Finally, I smile. "I'm really glad you called."

"I know."

She grins. "I was starting to miss your overthinking."

"I do not overthink."

She gives me a look.

I laugh. "Okay..." I admit. "...maybe a little."

"Only every day ending in 'y.'"

We say goodnight a few minutes later. The apartment is quiet again, but somehow it doesn't feel quite as empty.

I carry my bowl to the kitchen before wandering back to the sofa.

Almost without thinking, I reach for my planner lying on the coffee table.

Monday. Jamie - 10:00 a.m.

Wednesday. Jamie - 10:00 a.m.

Friday. Jamie - 10:00 a.m.

I keep turning pages.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.