Page 8 of Falling Again

“It’s not the only place,” Chloe says.

I open my eyes and look down at her. “What?”

“You said the house is the only place you’re connected with them. It’s not true. You will always be connected to them. No matter where you are.” She takes me in her arms, and I feel small. Despite being a foot taller than her, I let her comfort me.

I pull apart and dab my eyes with the back of my hand. “They’d be so happy to meet you,” I say to her. “All of you. They’d love our friend group. My dad would probably make everyone their favorite type of cake for their birthday, and my mom would tell everyone about their horoscope. They were eccentric and fun. They let me try new things and explore as a kid. I miss them like crazy, Chloe. I don’t talk about them enough.”

We start walking again; Chloe slips her arm around mine as we walk. Her warmth next to me feels comforting and safe.

“Why don’t you? Talk about them, I mean.”

“Because each time I say they died, it feels like I take three steps farther away from the memories of when they were alive.”

Chloe grips my arm tight, and I look down; she’s tearing up.

“Oh, Chlo, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have told you anything.”

“No, no, it’s fine. I am glad you did. I am honored you trust me enough to share something so personal.” She wipes her eyes and smiles back. “I lost my parents, too. Not in the same way, but they aren’t present in my life.”

“I’m sorry you lost your parents. Do you miss them?”

“Um.” She pauses and thinks before continuing. “I miss what kind of parents they could’ve been. I miss Annika’s parents more, honestly. But, luckily, Annika’s mom, Mia, calls me every other weekend.”

“Just you?”

“Well, no. She will call Annika and me, but we spend at least twenty minutes chatting on the phone. She’s more of a mom to me than my biological one. I’m so grateful for her and the rest of Annika’s family.”

“I’m looking forward to meeting them next month.”

“Oh my gosh, me too! You will love her brothers; they love baseball, and I bet Wes would love to learn how to rock climb.”

“Well, we will have to teach them. You’ll be a pro by then.”

Chloe laughs and unlinks her arm from mine to take a photo of oyster mushrooms sprouting from the side of a fallen tree.

“Just up ahead, there’s a view I’m sure will inspire you.” I point to the bend in the trail.

She stands and turns to me, trying to focus on the sound we are starting to hear. “Is that water?”

I smile and nod, and Chloe takes off, running down the path, with Scooter at her heels, pulling the leash in my hand. I follow her, and we both stop at the edge of the trail that opens to the waterfall. This time of year, it is more of a water trickle, but still beautiful. The water brightens the blue and black rock beneath it and collects in a small pool at the bottom. Chloe veers off the path, climbing rocks, with Scooter pulling me to go after her.

She takes a few pictures and then squats to sit on a flat rock. She pulls out a small sketchbook and a pencil from her bag. Scooter and I carefully climb the rocks and make our way over to her. I crouch next to her, watching her sketch the scene in front of us. She shades in the rock side and draws long lines demonstrating the waterfall.

“I can’t wait to paint this later,” she says, finishing up and closing her book. “I like photos, but sometimes a quick sketch needs to be done in the moment.”

“Do you paint a lot of water landscapes? You drew that so quickly, I’m so impressed.”

She blushes and says, “I used to. I would paint beaches, mostly at sunset. Annika would always go to the beach to take photos. She’d leave the photos scattered all around our apartment in San Diego after developing them, so occasionally, I’d take a few for reference. But this will be my first waterfall.”

“There’s another spot along the trail I think you’d love.”

“Let’s go!” she says, leaping from rock to rock, not missing a beat until she’s back on the trail.

We continue the trail, continuing casual conversation. We’ve both relaxed since releasing some baggage, and I feel better. It felt surprisingly pleasant to talk about my parents. I try to avoid it because I think it will make me feel worse, or really, I think I’ll make things awkward. But really, I feel happier to mention them. Like Chloe said, they will always be with me and talking about them makes me feel like they haven’t left.

Chloe stops in her tracks and lets out a big gasp. “Oh my, Ty. This is beautiful.”

We make our way to a field of wildflowers. This is my favorite spot on the trail. The waterfall gets the crowd, but the field is a lovely surprise that keeps people returning. The flowers vary by season. I make it a point to visit several times a year to see the different flowers blooming.