Page 111 of Mortala

The bottomless water hates to let go as I heave Sadie high enough to keep her face above water.From here, the noise of wheels rolling briskly over the bridge’s seams have blotted to low knocks while remaining stupidly unaware of my whole damn world floating limply in my arms.

Storm water carries us further downstream until the lights from the bridge fade into tiny twinkling specks.

My boots finally catch onto sturdier bedrock.I strain every muscle in my body to lug us closer to shore, all while holding her to my chest with one arm as the other fights the current with every strained step.

A hidden rock takes me by surprise and I stumble.My knees buckle out from under me and drop both of us into the cruel waters.A mouthful rushes into and down my pipes, making me choke.Most I spit out, though some manages to get deep enough to steal my breath.

At least here the water’s shallow.Hasty waves lap harshly at my chest, waist, hips, and finally my thighs as we rise from the depths.Before I can get us out of the river, rubber squeals across nearby asphalt followed by the hard thud of doors slamming—ear-numbing in the painful air.

On the bank, we finally collapse, both Sadie and myself too arduous to make it the rest of the way on our own.

"Sadie!"Nadia screams and slumps to the ground with a single hand cradling the full swell of their unborn child.Kace narrowly catches her when her legs give out, just as shocked in how he watches me pull their daughter's lifeless body onto solid ground.

"Kace!Please, please.My baby!"Her voice fractures.

He's dead silent, holding his wailing wife and trying to swallow through the boulder lodged in his throat.

"Sadieee!"She sobs her daughter's name like there's someone out there listening to her wordless prayers.

Rolling her onto her back, my knees are numb as I drop to them.Instinct, that's all I have.I've done this too many times to count; my body knows what to do even if my heart's breaking.

Two fingers tilt her chin back as I pinch her nose closed and crash my mouth to hers.I'm not...I can't allow this be the last time I feel her lips pressed to mine.

Once, twice, three times, I force a breath into her lungs and watch her chest rise.Each one, I pray, is the one that brings her back to me.

Over and over, I try to drag her home and each time she doesn't move—doesn't cough up water that's filled her lungs.At her silence and stillness, my heart plummets.She looks like she's asleep with her wet and clumpy lashes fanned over her cheeks, lips parted, and relaxed when she usually sleeps fitfully.Her eyes don't jump under their fleshy lids like they do with the most beautiful of dreams.My whole world is lying here motionless as I kneel at her side and watch my worst nightmare unfold.

No, no we're not doing this.

I'm not losing her.

Planting the frigid heel of my palm on her breast bone, the other covers its back into one solid unit, and compresses.They crush her sternum towards her spine, splintering her frail ribs in multiple grotesque snaps.My arms pump her chest until they burn, desperately trying to reach the one thing I'd give my whole life for.

"Dammit, Sunshine, breathe!"I plead with a crack in my voice.

Don't ever leave me alone.

Don't make memournyou.