Page 18 of My Fair Lord

“Of course. What is your problem? Some jewellery you have lost in a game of dominoes that you’d like me to reclaim. An unwanted suitor you wish me to deter, or a wanted one whose affections you wish to confirm?”

“Nothing so commonplace,” she replied.

Her eyes darted around the room, down to the table, up to his face. Her lips twitched, pulling the corner into a slight smile. “Shall we have some more coffee? Or would you prefer to switch to tea? I fancy some crumpets too.”

“Whichever you prefer,” Ned answered, not surprised at the change of subject. Clients often took a while to admit to what they needed him for. He would have chosen tea but, as it appeared he was about to be employed in her service, she could dictate what they had. Also, she would be paying the bill, or rather, her wealthy father would.

She sighed and lifted her chin, looking irritated.

“Mr Blake, I hate being asked to choose on behalf of others. It means I spend my time worrying I made the wrong decision and second guessing myself. Just tell me which you would like.”

“Tea,” he answered. “Please.”

“Thank you.” She smiled, her jaw losing some of its tightness. She waved a hand discreetly and a waitress glided over almost immediately and took her order.

“Miss Wakechild, if you will excuse my extreme overfamiliarity, you are a most fascinatingly direct woman.”

“Yes, I’ve been told so repeatedly.” From her tone, it sounded like those occasions had not been complimentary.

“I like it,” he hastened to add. “It’s refreshing.”

Her eyes narrowed as if she wasn’t sure he was telling the truth. He smiled and leaned confidentially towards her, hoping that would convince her.

“Why don’t you tell me what you need me to do? Please extend your directness to telling me how I can help you.”

“Thank you, Mr Blake. It’s quite refreshing to meet a man – anyone in fact – who seems to truly believe that my directness is not an annoyance. If you are lying, you do it very sincerely, which gives me confidence.” She gave him a sweet smile and leaned forwards as if about to impart something highly confidential. Ned’s pulse sped up a little and he leaned closer.

“I wish you to help me perpetrate a hoax.”

ChapterSix

Fortunately, Ned was saved from reacting to the unexpected revelation because at that moment, a large pot of China tea arrived, accompanied by a plate of buttered crumpets. The smell and the sight of the holes dripping with melted butter and honey momentarily transported him back to a happier childhood.

“I haven’t eaten crumpets in more years than I care to remember,” he murmured.

“I never had them before I came here, but they’re delicious,” Miss Wakechild said. “Please help yourself.”

Ned bit into one and chewed enthusiastically. As much as he wanted to continue with the conversation, he wasn’t going to decline the offer.

“A hoax, you say. Who would be the victim and what would it entail?” he asked between mouthfuls.

Miss Wakechild beamed. “I’m so pleased you didn’t immediately refuse. I knew you were the person I would need to help me as soon as I thought of the plan.”

“I’m not sure it’s a compliment,” Ned said, frowning, “that I’m the first person who came to mind when you’re contemplating something illegal.”

Miss Wakechild’s mouth dropped open. “What makes you think it’s illegal?”

“Hoaxes usually are. They’re a type of fraud after all.”

“That’s true,” she said slowly, as if the idea was only just occurring to her. “But this one isn’t. At least, I’m not intending to defraud anyone.”

Ned poured the tea. By now it would be starting to stew. “I dance around the edges of legality occasionally. I do try to stay on the proper side, though. I don’t fancy getting myself jailed or hanged.”

Miss Wakechild nodded, clearly approving of Ned’s commitment to ongoing existence. “Well, no, of course you don’t. I can completely see why the thought of prison or the noose would concern you. No, I don’t think that would be the case at all with what I’m proposing.”

“What exactly are you proposing? You still haven’t told me,” Ned prompted.

“I’m sorry, you’re right. I want you to pretend that you are a viscount and let me introduce you to my father.”