Page 16 of Undone

Darcy lowered himself into the chair opposite at last, leaning forward with his forearms resting upon his knees. He had not intended to speak of any of it, yet now that Bingley had guessed as much, concealment seemed almost pointless.

"What I said of Miss Bennet last evening," he said quietly, "was not merely ill-mannered. It was entirely false."

"I had gathered as much."

"No." Darcy shook his head. "I mean false in every particular."

Bingley waited.

Darcy let out a slow breath. "She is a very handsome woman. Indeed, she was the only lady in the room who truly engaged my notice."

For a long moment Bingley simply stared at him.

"Then why, in Heaven's name, did you declare the opposite before half of Meryton?" he said at last.

Darcy's gaze dropped briefly to the floor before returning to his friend.

"You know enough of what has befallen me these past few years, Bingley. You know of the reverses in my affairs, the whispers, the disappointments. What I have never told you is that it has not been my business concerns alone."

Bingley's brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"

Darcy was silent for a moment, as though the words themselves resisted being spoken.

"Every woman in whom I have shown the least particular interest has, in one way or another, been removed from my life. Some withdrew without explanation. Others suffered consequences I cannot believe were accidental." He paused, his expression hardening. "I have come to believe their misfortunes were visited upon them because of their connection with me."

For several moments Bingley did not answer. His brow furrowed as he searched Darcy's face, as though hoping to discover some hint that he spoke in jest.

"You believe they were... targeted?"

"I do."

"And you have never told me this?"

"When the pattern first began to suggest itself some months ago, I dismissed it as imagination. It was not until I came to London in August that I could no longer persuade myself it was merely coincidence."

“How many ladies formed this pattern?”

“Two.”

"Oh, Darcy," Bingley said with a faint chuckle, "two ladies changing their minds is hardly evidence of some malicious design."

Darcy shook his head. "You do not yet see the whole of it. Set those disappointments beside the investment ventures that have failed these past five years, the accidents upon my estates, the rumours that have spread through London about me, the men I had thought my friends who quietly withdrew, and now this. Consider them together, Bingley, and tell me it is merely coincidence."

Bingley's smile faded. "When you put it so... it sounds more like design than Providence." He looked at Darcy in astonishment. "Why did you never tell me?"

"I had no proof. I have none still."

"But you believe it."

"I do."

Bingley rose and crossed slowly to the hearth, one hand passing thoughtfully across his chin as he tried to reconcile this revelation with all he knew of his friend.

"Good God..."

Darcy rose and crossed to the window, unable to remain still.

"Because of that, I resolved whilst in London to encourage no attachment until this business is brought to an end. I would not have Miss Bennet become another victim merely because she happened to attract my notice."