Page 35 of Tell Me I'm Enough

These are my stomping grounds.

We leave them in the dust, speeding through the streets like we’re invincible. I start to slow down slightly as Chase hands me back the blunt, and I take a hit of the end of it.

Just as I’m about to tamp her down all the way, I see lights and hear the sirens behind us.

“Shit,” I bite out.

I toss the end of the blunt out of the car and don’t even think when I hit the gas.

“Bro!” Tanner yells. “Are you about to dip on a cop?”

“Do you wanna spend your spring break in a jail cell?”

He just shakes his head no, and I grip the wheel, making a sharp turn off the strip.

I can still see the lights, but I’m putting more distance between us.

“Ahh, fuck,” Chase says from the back.

“Fuck yeah!” Tank shouts.

I floor the gas on an open road and make it up to a neighborhood I’m familiar with from coming down to the East Coast enough growing up.

It doesn’t take me long to fully lose the cop, but I stay on the back roads for a little while until I feel like I’m far enough away not to be recognized for the car we’re in, and then pull back onto a main road.

When I get to a light and stop the car, we all turn to each other and start laughing.

“I’m trying to enjoy my spring break,” I say, flicking the radio on, “not get chewed out by my dad from behind bars.”

“You’re fucking crazy, Sinclair,” Tanner says, still laughing. “I knew you’d be perfect for the Sig house the day I met you.”

“Yeah, well, that little stunt just got me out of having to put my name in the hat to be the DD today. I deserve to drink after that one!”

“Fine, fine,” Tanner says.

He looks back at Tank and Chase, who both throw their heads back. “Better flip a coin, boys,” he tells them.

“I’ll give you a hundred bucks to be the DD,” Chase tells Tank.

Tank thinks about it for a second. “How many drinks can I have and still be under the limit?”

“None!” we all shout at him.

“Fuck. Fine…deal. I’d better see my money, though, Chase. I know where you sleep.”

* * *

Every inch of sand is packed with bodies. Spring break in Florida always gets pretty crazy. It actually gets so wild that thecops don’t even waste their time trying to break the parties up anymore.

It’s the middle of the day, the sun is brutal, bodies are pressed together, and the music around us is blaring. The only thing that makes it all enjoyable is the alcohol and the buzz from the weed.

Chase hands me a full bottle of Casamigo, and I take it, tip my head back, and chug a couple shots’ worth before a girl shouts for me to share with her. I smile and nod at her to tip her head back for me. She smirks and does what I tell her, her long braids hanging behind her as her head tips back, and her mouth opens. I pour some into her mouth, and she whips her head back up as some of the alcohol drips down the side of her mouth and onto her bathing suit. I wink at her and take another swig of the bottle before handing it off to someone else.

A couple of girls from the Gamma house, who came with us to Florida, come over to me and Chase and pull us to dance with them. I let the girl—Joy—pull me into an open circle where people are dancing. She dances with her back to me, hands behind her, tangled in my hair. I place my hands on her waist and move her to the music. It doesn’t take long before another girl steals her spot—she’s not a Gamma girl, not one I’ve met before, at least. She’s pretty, though, and I let her take me and dance as the music changes to something with a heavier beat. It’s fun, and I lose myself to the pull of it all.

All of this is just a way to let our brains turn off and let our bodies take over. It’s easy not to be stressed out by responsibilities when you’re in a place like this.

Another two girls move in on me like prey. I recognize them—Brittany and Ava. The Bleach Blonde Sisters from the Gamma house. They aren’t actually blood-related, but they tell everyone they are because they both look like pin-up Barbie dolls whocould pass as twins. Plus, they like to entice guys with the thought of hooking up with real sisters.