Page 54 of Cautious Love

I take a deep breath and remember the look in his eyes and the blood.

“He was gone for a long time. But midnight rolled around, and he still wasn’t back, and I was sober and tired. I called him, and he didn’t pick up, which made me start to worry. Normally, I would’ve gone to bed, but I stayed up this time. And when he got back, he had blood on him. It wasn’t all over his face, but it looked like it was before he wiped it off. I asked him about it, and he said his dad needed help with butchering. I thought it was odd because they usually move so much cattle that they have an agreement with a processor.”

“I don’t think he was helping to butcher Black Angus, Shy,” Ledger says tonelessly.

I know he wasn’t but I can’t tell you that.

“Anyway, when I left for work, the next day my car was clean, and I meanclean.Someone had detailed every inch of it. I told myself it was because Grey wanted to do something nice for me. I forced myself to believe it but…”

Ledger squeezes my shoulder, cutting me off. “Thank you,” he says.

I nod, suddenly not hungry anymore.

“Does anyone else know about this?” he asks me.

I rub my arms, suddenly feeling cold.No one who will talk.

“Do you think Grey is concerned that you know this information?”

“Maybe, I can’t be sure.”Yes.

“Okay, well, we’re going to assume he thinks you told me something about them, and in this case, being married probably reinforces that, so we’re going to let him keep assuming it.”

“Why?” I ask him.

“Because most criminals, especially the ones who beat their girlfriends after cheating on them, and think someone is watching, take extra precautions, which includes not killing someone.”

“Not killing me?” I whisper.

I should have gone to Dad. I should have left.

“Maybe, but everything’s okay, there’s a plan, and if we can find where the bodies are buried, so to speak, then it could change everything,” Ledger says.

I cringe, rubbing my chest. “I’m going to lie down. I’m not hungry anymore.”

“Can I get you something?” he asks, and I can feel his eyes on me as I walk down the hall.

Grey didn’t beat me because he’s a piece of shit, little bitch ass boy. No, he beat me to keep me quiet about everything else. Which makes me wonder, aside from that night, what else have I seen that I chose to ignore?

It’s amazing what someone can put up with so they aren’t alone. Being away from Grey has not only made things clearer. It forced me to ask myself why I wasn’t strong enough when I knew things were going bad. Why was I so afraid to be alone that I allowed myself to stay with someone who never really loved me? I believe he did at one point, and we had a lot of fun together. But as we got older, I understand now that he never intended to give me the life we dreamed of as kids. While I was working hard to build, he was only coming in behind me to tear it down.

Now I’m rebuilding again, and part of me says I can do it by myself, but that’s the problem I have been for a long time. Grey was merely a fixture. I don’twantto do it by myself anymore, but I have to. Yet, all I can think about while I stare at the ceiling is how Ledger is someone who can build. He’s someone that can keep, and I may barely know what his mouth feels like against mine, or how his heart beats under his skin, but I don’t have to know those things intimately to see what kind of man he is. Only I wish I was the kind of woman he could see building with.

Chapter 14

Ledger

HowdoIfinda body in the vast land of Paxton County? There’s a lot of land here that goes untouched. It’s a needle in a haystack, but it’ssomething.It’s enough for me to go off of and pull Will from trying to go undercover. It’s the best way I know how to protect my people and get the job done. Or it’s throwing spaghetti at the wall hoping something sticks, because it assumes there’s a body to find and evidence to support who did it.

The moment I got into the station, Daisy fills me in on arrests from last night, two for DUIs, both alcohol and drug related. We’ve nearly doubled arrests this year, and there’s only one explanation — the Kensingtons.

After that revelation, I call Will and Luke in to explain most of what Shiloh told me last night, and they’ve been quiet since.

Luke runs a hand through his hair. “I don’t know, boss, that’s not much to go on.”

“And if we brought Grey in for questioning, he’ll clam up like a high school boy tryin’ to get to second base,” Will says.

“Are you speaking from experience, Will?” Luke grins.