Page 124 of Just Between Us

Liam moves to sit on the edge of the bed and takes my hand in his. “What’s the last thing you remember?”

My brain is sludge and my head is throbbing but I know there’s something. Something I need to remember. Like a slow fog, each memory comes crawling in. Going to Next Note. The rain. Fear. My eyes slam shut as the wreck comes crashing in. I was so scared. It happened so fast and I was so scared.

“How bad?” I’m terrified of his answer, but I have to know.

“Shh, shh.”

“Liam, how bad?”

He takes a deep inhale and his grip on my hand increases. “You had a brain bleed. They did surgery. You’ve been in a medically induced coma to help the healing process.”

It takes great effort to focus on his words. Slowly I process each one. “How long?”

“A week.”

I’ve been in this bed an entire week. There’s something else Ineed to remember. What is it? I go back to the night of our wreck. Something, something, something. We were trying to get back here. Then a quick memory flashes. Googling childbirth statistics. “Penny. The baby. How are they?”

Liam smiles and grabs his phone from the table, swiping and turning it for me to see the most beautiful little human. Face red, mouth open. So tiny. He swipes to another of my mom holding her. And another of Penny and Austin both looking at her, beaming.

My chin starts to wobble. “They’re…okay?”

Liam reaches up to brush his thumb across my cheek. I’m crying. I didn’t realize I was.

“They had to stay a few extra days. But yes. Everyone is healthy and fine.”

“Promise?” I ask.

Liam holds up his pinky, eyes now glistening. “Pinky swear,” he says when I hook mine with his. “I love you. I missed getting to talk to you. Laugh with you.”

I don’t know what to say to that. Worry creases his forehead, but fatigue is jumbling my thoughts. My lids start to feel heavy and all I can manage is a quiet “I love you, too.”

“Liam,” I mumble. He’s snoring in the chair next to the bed. “Liam,” I say, a bit louder.

He jerks, sitting straight up, eyes wild. “What. What is it? Are you in pain?”

“I need to pee.”

At some point a nurse came in and removed my catheter. She showed me the call button and warned me not to try going alone. I’m still a fall risk. I’ve sat here at least five minutes,deliberating on whether I wanted help peeing from a stranger or from Liam.

He unfolds his body from the chair and lowers the bed rail. “Easy,” he says as I swing my legs over the edge.

Standing, my legs are wobbly like a newborn fawn, and Liam wraps an arm around my waist to steady me. “You can do this. One foot in front of the other. I’ve got you.” Liam unplugs my IV Pole and wheels it with us.

I swear it takes us ten minutes and a million baby steps to get there, all the while my bladder is screaming, but I finally reach the toilet. Raising my oversized gown, I’m horrified when I see a mesh monstrosity. “What the fuck is this?” I say, looking down at it.

“The sexiest panties I’ve ever seen. Now, tell me what I can do.”

Do I want him to watch me pee? A week ago the answer would have been absolutely not. But I’ve been in a coma, I’m wearing what appears to be a fishnet, and my bladder is about to make the decision for me. “Just…shit, can you help me pull these down?”

Liam doesn’t hesitate. He just grabs the elastic and pulls them down around my ankles. “They were afraid you might leak,” he explains, nodding at the diaper-sized pad sitting in the crotch of the fishnet. I don’t have it in me to be mortified. This bathroom trip alone is exhausting and all I want is to relieve my bladder and get back in bed.

Liam eases me onto the toilet seat and steps back just enough to give me space but not enough to be out of reach. The relief I feel is almost painful.

“I think I just had a peegasm.”

Liam’s shoulders shake with laughter. “You just came up with that on your own?”

It hurts to laugh but I do it anyway.