Page 18 of Scar

Maeve's POV

I've been here for two days. I'm starving and I'm annoyed but I can't say I'm miserable. Leon isn't mean to me. He leaves me alone. The bed is comfortable, the room is beautiful, and the view is even better. But I hate that I don't hate this. I hate that he's screwing me over with school, that now I won't be able to afford to catch up. I hate that my roommates will forever wonder where I went. But I don't hate where I am.

I'm scared to eat anything. I don't know what's not contaminated in this house. Honestly, it's probably everything. Most people don't consider cross-contamination with gluten. Most people don't even consider if their food contains gluten at all. It's a non-factor for most people. So, I haven't eaten. I'm too afraid of getting sick. But it's wearing me down. I wish I could be normal and eat the meals he prepares for me, but I'm scared. I've only been given gluten a few times since my diagnosis, and each time, I felt like I was dying. Each time, I either threw up uncontrollably, or it came out the other end. And the bloating... So, I've been starving myself kind of in hopes that he'll let me go.

Leontacklingme andhavingsex with me in his backyard. It shouldn't have been as erotic as it was. I was so wet from him forcing himself on me, even being forceful he was gentle with me. He took it slow, but holy crap that hurt. Are they all this big? I've only ever had sex with Shelby and toys, never anywhere near the size of Leon. I felt like I was being split in two when he thrust into me all the way. I know he saw the tears falling into the grass, but it didn't stop him. I didn't stop him. I don't know if it would have made any difference to tell him no, but I didn't even try. It's embarrassing how little fight I put into not having sex with Leon.

Today was the same scenario. I didn't even stop him when he came into bed spooning me and had sex with me again. He grabbed my wrist as a precaution, I assume. Because I made no effort to stop him. It actually felt good, I felt like I could cum. But then the fear that he was going to cum in me again ruined my orgasm. So now I'm scared of being pregnant, and I'm on edge because I haven't gotten off since he kidnapped me. I'm too scared to touch myself with him in bed beside me. I don't think about it during the day when he's gone. Maybe tomorrow when he leaves for work... But right now, he's still inside of me. He's keeping his cum in me and just cuddling. Is this normal? Is this what people in relationships do? Is this what he thinks this is?

Leon lays with me for a while, I do end up falling asleep for a little bit. I'm not sure why. All I've done is sleep for two days. But I also haven't eaten, so I have no energy. So I guess it makes sense. But it also feels oddly right to be laying here with Leon holding me. I feel safe despite everything going on. I'm not sure if I can admit that to him, though.

After a while of laying there with Leon, he starts to get restless, and I can feel him harden inside of me again. As nice as it feels, I'm feeling sore. I could try telling him no and see what he says. It would tell me if my consent ever mattered or ever will. But I don't even get that far when he slowly pulls out of me. He moves my hair aside, kissing the side of my neck and climbing out of bed. I don't react, I can't react to him. I feel like if I do, I'm giving up even more than he's already forced out of me. He's taken enough, I'm wearing a freaking shock collar like a dog! He stole my virginity in the yard, and I'm too scared to eat. He's not getting my submission, too. He'll have to beg for that.

Leon leaves the room, leaving the door cracked partially. As soon as I hear his steps disappear down the hallway, I hop up and rush to the bathroom to relieve myself. They say it's always best to pee after sex, and with any luck his cum will rush out of me when I sit on the toilet. I'm sure after two hours of it stewing inside of me, it's done what it's needed to do. But it's worth a shot, right? I'm not ready for a baby!

It's over an hour before Leon comes back in. He's fully dressed and slightly limping. He stops in the doorway and just stares at me. "I need you to eat something." He says. I ignore him like he's not standing ten feet from me. "It's not an option." He says a little more firmly.

I can't. I'm too scared. "Not hungry." I lie, but I don't look at him. I stay focused on the book in my lap that, honestly, I've finished twice since being here. Leon sighs again, this time moving into the room and sitting on the edge of the bed. "It's not optional. Either you eat something, or I sedate you and put in a tube feed." He tells me. What? I open my eyes wide and stare at him in disbelief. He reaches for me and takes my hand, not letting me pull away. "I know about your diet. Can you just trust me a little bit?" He asks.

"Have you been watching me?" I ask him. How else would he know about my diet? Unless he somehow got my medical records. I doubt a professor could swing that. "Yes." He says calmly. As creepy as that is, I kind of knew. I've been seeing his car in passing since we met. I've been seeing him out of the corner of my eye ever since the grocery store. I assume we were just both at the same places at the same time. Which isn't untrue, but now I know it was planned that way.

Leon stands up, scooping me up into his arms again. At the same time, I hate when he does that. I like it. "I can walk, butthole." I tell him firmly. He lets out a loud laugh, carefully sitting me on my feet. "I'll never tire of your insults, fleur." He says. He walks ahead of me out of the room. I don't really have a choice but to follow, do I? I don't want to have some backyard tube feed shoved in. I couldn't even guarantee the nutrients are gluten free, but if he swears he knows my diet and I should trust him. I will trust him, reluctantly. So,I follow. I follow him through his gorgeous ranch style home and towards his massive kitchen. He, however, keeps going. He walks until we're in the dining room and pulls out a chair, gesturing his hand for me to sit.

The food Leon made actually smells amazing. Crap, my mouth is watering and I know he just heard my stomach growl. That's so embarrassing! He joins me a second later with a large pan, sitting it on two oven mitts so he doesn't burn his kitchen table.

It looks amazing, it somehow smells even better. "Garlic roasted vegetables and chickpeas for protein." Heexplainsto me. He scoops up a hefty scoop of these vegetables, putting them onto my plate before doing the same with his own. Ipickup my fork nervously, I told him I would eat. But now that it's in front of me, I'm too scared to eat it. I don't know if every celiac reacts as badly to gluten as I do, but I can't handle that pain.

Plus, when I was diagnosed as a kid, I was warned about the permanent damage that it could do to my body. So even if I wasn't so afraid of the side effects, I am certainly scared of anemia, numbness of my legs and feet, my teeth changing color, infertility, and brittle bones. That's terrifying!

I simply push the food around on my plate with the fork until Leon sighs and reaches for my hand. "You need to eat." He tells me. I look up at him, afraid to be vulnerable, but I have to be honest. "I'm scared." I tell him, hoping the look on my face conveys the true fear that I have over being glutened.

He squeezes my hand lightly, keeping eye contact with me. "It's okay, I wouldn't do anything to hurt you." He tells me. I raise an eyebrow at him. "You drugged me, you kidnapped me, you raped me!" I remind him. Leon frowns like he has the nerve to be upset with me for saying that, for stating the obvious. "Did you tell me no?" He asks. I don't answer, I can't. Well, I could but I would be proving him right. He didn't technically rape me, and I never tried to stop him. "Exactly. I did drug you, and I promise you that you were perfectly safe. I accounted for your weight and monitored you the entire time. But I am sorry about that. And I kidnapped you from a home that you were no longer welcome in. I kidnapped you from becoming homeless. I gave you a home, a beautiful home." He explains. Crap, I hate that he's right. "Ah! But you electrocuted me." Ipoint outwhen I think of it. He sighs, nodding his head. "I did, but to be fair. I warned you not to run, and I pulled you away from the fence so it couldn't continue shocking you." He argues. Crap, he keeps arguing all my points a little too easily.

Leon squeezes my hand again, bringing my focus back to him. "Think about it this way, fleur. I got to know you from afar for months, I studied you, I followed you, I looked out for you. I carefully packed all your things so that when you came here you felt at home. Would I really have done all that just to hurt you?" He asks. Honestly, he's making sense. If he stalked me for months then he knows about my celiac. He knows how seriously I take it and being vegan. "You can trust me, I will always take care of you." He adds in. I know it's creepy, heck I barely know him. But it's not like I have a lot of options, and if he did kidnap me to hurt me. He would've done it by now. If I was meant to be killed and turned into a lampshade, it would have already happened. Right?

The food really is delicious. All the vegetables are slow roasted so they're soft and caramelized perfectly, and the chickpeas are somehow slightly crunchy. It's delicious. I find myself eating far too quickly not to be embarrassing. But Leon doesn't point it out, he just scoops up more of the vegetables and puts them onto my plate when I am almost finished with my first serving.

"In two weeks I will be setting you up in my study. All of your exams will be done online, with a camera pointed at you so they know you're not cheating. You will still finish this school year." He tells me casually. I stop eating, looking over at him. "What?" I ask in disbelief. He smiles a smug smile, taking a large drink from his glass of water before answering me. "I called the school, you're free to take your finals online. But I will be there watching so you don't try to warn them that something is wrong. Just remember, you don't know where you are. So even if you do tell them something is wrong, they will never find you. But you will not finish your finals that way, and you will fail." He says.

I don't understand how Leon can go from comforting and sweet to psychotic so quickly. How can I go from feeling safe here to terrified? I gulp, nodding my head and focusing on my plate. I don't want to look at him anymore, which is kind of disappointing since before this, we were actually having a nice evening. We were talking, even laughing. He was nice. He doesn't feel so nice right now. "Do you understand me?" He asks. I keep my eyes on my plate, setting my fork down. "Yes." I answer quietly. "May I go to bed?" I ask him. He sighs, reaching for my hand, but I pull away from him and put my hands into my lap. "Go on." He says tome.

Chapter 26

Leon's POV

Things were going well. We were talking, joking, and laughing. I was learning more about her, things I couldn't learn from watching her from a distance. Like the way her nose scrunches up when she laughs, the way she does a little wiggle in her seat when something tastes really good, or the way she mouths the words she says, even after she's done saying them. Like those shows that are translated to another language.

It's cute.

She's so much more appealing and stunning from this close. And she's hilarious and sarcastic, but she won't cuss. Not even the small words that they allow people on TVto say. But, of course, I screwed that up by bringing up her finals. Fuck. Her mood shifted so easily, and her smile faded until it was completely gone. The light in her eyes dimmed. She even gave up on her dinner. I wasn't trying to upset her. Maybe I should have waited to tell her about her finals. But I thought I was doing the right thing by giving her time to study.

I clean up dinner, packing away the leftovers. She seemed to enjoy the meal, hopefully she will eat it again tomorrow while I'm at work. I've been leaving leftovers in the fridge for her, but she has free reign of the house. So she could make herself whatever she wanted. I kind of hope someday I come home to see that she'd made us both dinner. We could eat it together, talk about my day and hers. She could tell me how the garden is looking and what new things she has planted. When dinner is over, she could sit between my legs on the couch while she works on her school work, and I work on my patient notes. Maybe we would have a few colder nights that we could light the fireplace and let that be the only light source in the house. It sounds nice. It sounds perfect. But I don't know if it will happen now.

I take my time cleaning up and take a seat on the couch. Normally, I'd sit in bed and work on notes while Maeve sleeps, I'd get to admire her while I'm working. It calms me down after a long day to work on my notes with a hand on her back. I get to breathe in her sweet blueberry scent while also feeling her warmth, it makes my day instantly better to be near her.

I don't exactly think Maeve wants to see me right now, I don't blame her. I was an asshole. But at least this gives me the chance to rest my leg.

I take my prosthesis off, sitting it on the floor beside the couch, and kick my sore leg up onto the chase. It's swollen and bruised and even the bone hurts. I need a break, one longer than the few clients that allow me to sit at my desk for their appointments. I'm hoping soon Maeve will feel comfortable enough here that I don't have to worry about her running so I can take my leg off more often. Right now, she hasn't even realized I'm an amputee. I wonder what she'll say about it? Will she judge me? It makes me wonder what she'll say when I tell her everything my mother did to me. All the experiments. I'm scared she'll want to run screaming when she sees the monster my mother created.