Page 8 of A Devious Secret

Chapter Two

With every rotation of the wheels, Gemma felt more at peace with her decision to travel to London. She knew her experience would be vastly different than what she was accustomed to. She had been the diamond of the first water during her first Season and had caught the eye of many handsome lords. But everything changed when she had been introduced to Baldwin. With his intoxicating blue eyes, she had fallen hard, and he quickly occupied her heart.

When Baldwin died, she had been nearly inconsolable, but time had dulled that pain. She used to frequent his grave every day, hoping to feel close to him, but she always left feeling more alone than she had when she arrived.

Tears came to her eyes, and she wondered if she would ever stop crying when she thought of Baldwin. They had only been married for three years, but he had been her whole world during that time. How could she go on without him?

Her dark-haired lady’s maid’s voice broke through her musings. “Are you thinking about your husband?” Lydia asked with compassion in her voice.

Gemma reached up and swiped at the tear that was sliding down her cheek. “I am,” she admitted.

She was most grateful that she was traveling with Lydia, who had been her lady’s maid since before her coming out ball. They had grown close after her husband’s death, and she was grateful that she could be so open and honest with her, which was a rarity amongst servants. But Lydia had proven herself to be a trusted confidante over the years.

Lydia gave her an understanding look. “He was a good man.”

“That he was. He was the best of men,” Gemma agreed. “But I do need to stop crying whenever I think of him.”

“There is no shame in that.”

“A lady does not cry in public,” Gemma said. She could practically hear her mother say those words. Her mother had always taken it upon herself to teach her how to be a proper lady from a young age. When girls were outside playing games, she was with her mother, sipping tea and conversing with the women that had come to call.

Lydia adjusted the sleeves of her maid’s uniform. “You must give yourself some allowance since you have only recently ended the mourning period for your husband.”

“I do believe I will always mourn for him.”

“As well as you should,” Lydia said. “You loved him deeply. That kind of love does not just disappear.”

“Lord Hawkinge accused me of forgetting my husband by going to Town.”

Lydia pressed her lips together. “I would not give Lord Hawkinge’s words any credence. They are just that- words.”

Gemma glanced out the window and admired the townhouses as they drove by. She did miss the excitement of London and the constant stream of social events.

“Do you intend to see your father while you are in Town?” Lydia asked.

“I do not.”

“It has been years since you last saw him.”

Gemma frowned. “My father made his choice when he married that horrible woman,” she said. “My mother hadn’t been dead a month before they exchanged their vows.”

“That was in bad form, but he is still your father.”

She brought her gaze back to meet Lydia’s. “My father has not attempted to contact me once since his nuptials. He didn’t even attend Baldwin’s funeral.”

“That is true, but—”

Gemma cut her off. “Why are you trying to defend my father’s actions?”

“Because there were things I wish I had said to my father before he passed,” Lydia replied. “For once they are gone, the opportunity goes away, leaving you wondering what could have been.”

“If my father cared a whit for me, he would have been there when I truly needed him.” Gemma worked hard to keep the sadness out of her voice. Their estrangement had taken a toll on her, but she refused to acknowledge how much her father had hurt her.

Fortunately, before Lydia could reply, the coach came to a stop in front of a lavish whitewashed townhouse with gold embellishments over the windows.

The footman opened the door and extended his hand to assist her out of the coach. She slipped her gloved hand into his and went to step down onto the pavement.

She had just taken a step towards the main door when it was opened, and the familiar butler greeted her. “Good afternoon, my lady.”