Page 33 of The Billionaire's Angel

There was a rough earthiness to Gage that I found reassuring. Maybe it was because Anthony and Aiden, men with that type of refined elegance, reminded me of my father. My cool, restrained father who had had only enough warmth in his heart for one woman, my mother. When she’d died, he'd buried himself in hisjob.

He’d told me not to marry Anthony, and when I hadn't listened, he cut me off. I’d managed to call him twice during my marriage, hoping he might offer a lifeline, but he’d told me calmly that I'd made my bed and I'd have to sleep in it. Literally. I hadn't seen him in fiveyears.

I didn't think I could be attracted to a man who reminded me of my father or Anthony. I trusted Aiden as an employer, and I could appreciate his good looks, but they didn't do anything forme.

There was something about Gage I couldn't shake off. He was raw and honest and purelyhimself.

His control the night before had been intense. Not like Anthony. Another superficial thing they had in common that was completely different under the surface. Anthony had lived for control. Everything about him was a way to control others. The charming façade he presented to the world. The way he locked down every emotion except those he wanted toshow.

When the ugly parts bubbled to the surface in a fit of violent rage, he’d still had enough control to save it all for me. And the moment he'd released enough of that rage through his fists or his belt or his kicking feet, the façade snapped back into place. Anthony used self-control as a shield and aweapon.

Even in his worst attacks on me, he’d been in control. He never left a bruise I couldn't cover with clothing. He never broke a bone. He bruised my kidneys once or twice badly enough that there'd been blood in my urine, but otherwise, I had no lastingdamage.

If he'd injured me, I might have had to get medical attention, and that would reveal the truth of our marriage. Worse yet, a broken bone or internal bleeding would've required that I go to the hospital and Anthony refused to allow me to leave the property. More of his obsession with control. Sometimes I thought he’d married me so he could exert his will over another human being in every possibleway.

After Anthony, I should've hated being near a man with that same iron control. But Gage didn't use control as a weapon; it was a part of his strength. He used it to protect the people aroundhim.

The night before, dazed with pleasure and shaking in his arms, I would've given him anything heasked.

Never mind that he was right, I wasn't ready. I wasn't sure how I felt about Gage making that decision for me, but I’d felt the steely heat of his erection. If I hadn't touched him, I never would've known how much he wanted me. I wouldn't have understood what it took for him to hold back, to give me so much pleasure and take none inreturn.

Anthony had used his control to bring me a nightmare of pain. Gage used control to keep me safe. Even fromhimself.

“You need another cup of coffee,” Amelia said from across the table. I sent her a weak smile, and she said, “You didn't sleep well again, didyou?”

“No, not really.” I didn't volunteer the exact nature of mynot sleeping. Amelia was endlessly nosy and interfering. I didn't want to think about what she might do if she'd found out I’d spent the night with Gage. The possibilities werehorrifying.

“Are you sure you don't want to try that tea again?” sheasked.

I shuddered. I couldn't help it; the memory of the tea wasthatawful. I took a sip of coffee just to wash the thought of itaway.

“I'll make a deal with you, Amelia,” I said. “I’ll drink another cup of that tea right after you drink two ofthem.”

“Whytwo?”

“Because you have more than enough grit to force yourself to drink one cup of that stuff, but two cups is an entirely different story. You'd never make it through two cups. No human being would voluntarily drink two cups of thattea.”

“That bad, huh?” Amelia winked at me, and I scowled back. “I'll find something else. Something that doesn't taste soterrible.”

“It's okay. I'm used to it by now,” Isaid.

Getting up from the table, I went to the buffet on the sideboard and took a few more pieces of bacon and another serving of eggs. With Aiden still out of town, there were only three of us eating regular meals at Winters House, but that didn't stop Abel from putting out a full spread everymorning.

“You shouldn't be used to it,” Amelia said. “You're a nurse; you know a good night’s sleep is important. Going day after day without sleeping is terrible. It’sinhuman.”

“You only think so because you're part sloth,” I said, dryly. Sometimes I thought she was. I envied Amelia her close relationship with sleep. She went to bed early and slept until eight in the morning, sometimes getting as much as ten hours anight.

It wasn't unknown for her to doze off in the middle of the afternoon. She wasn't fatigued, she just loved to sleep. Normally, as people age, their need for sleep lessened, and Amelia had admitted she could get by on a lot less. She just didn't wantto.

Some nights, when I was laying in bed staring at the ceiling, I thought I would've killed to be able to sleep likethat.

“Maybe you need to find a therapist and talk about your nightmares,” she said, quietly. “Or exercise. Exercise is supposed to be great for helping yousleep.”

“Unfortunately, I have an allergy to exercise,” I said with a straight face. “Every time I do it I start sweating and get short of breath. It's terrible. I have to sit down until it goesaway.”

Amelia rolled her eyes at me. “We should walk more,” she said, decisively. “We've been staying in too much since the weather turned cold. We should put on our jackets and go back to our regular walk in theGardens.”

I didn't mind walking. Walking wasn't real exercise. Not the way we did it. In warmer weather, Amelia and I had gone to the Botanical Gardens a few times a week. The paths were wide and paved, perfect for Amelia, who could walk for hours but wasn't up for the grade changes and unstable terrain of hiking. Both the Botanical Gardens and Piedmont Park where they were located, were scenic andinteresting.