Page 9 of January Bell

CHAPTER

FIVE

ZAN

Ken is still looking at us expectantly.

“I am not entertained,” I tell him, nodding in agreement with my statement. None of this was very entertaining. My voice is calm, but inside I am seething with anger that my female has been put into danger by this psychotic artificial intelligence.

“I think you and I have a very different idea of entertaining,” I tell Ken, taking another step forward.

The image flickers, and the strange garments he’s wearing change, turning a brilliant shade of green and a deep brown.

“Please tell me there’s not a reason you’ve switched to camouflage from hot pink,” Lily says, making that long, deep, noisy exhalation she prefers to make when she’s extremely upset.

For this reason and this reason alone, I take a step back from the image of the artificial intelligence, grateful to have someone else be the reason she’s angry.

“Of course not,” Ken says, spreading his hands wide.

The large, feathered animal coos where she’s bathing in the grass, and all three of our gazes flicker to her momentarily.

“Is that thing going to attack us?” Lily asks, sounding perturbed.

“Of course not,” Ken tells her, shaking his head. “Hens are the submissive creatures, this one more so than most. She is part of your reward for defeating today’s challenge, as is…” He gestures to the table and the strange baskets sitting before us. “…the rest of this. A feast, if you can make it happen.”

Lily rolls her eyes, shifting on her feet. I cannot help but grin as I watch her.

I like that she does not care about hiding her thoughts.

“Don’t forget, contestants, you’re being watched by our live audience,” Ken continues, turning to address something standing in front of the chicken. “I’m grateful to announce it is growing daily thanks to our sponsors, the Roth and the Draegon planets. And for those watching at home, you can buy your own prize package simply by going to the Mated and Afraid website.” Ken gestures grandly. “There you can enter your⁠—"

“Are you freaking kidding me?” Lily interrupts.

Ken’s gaze darts back to her, and I take a step closer to her, wanting to protect her from what’s sure to be his fury.

“Now you’re plugging merch?” she asks. “Unbelievable. What is wrong with you?”

“I wouldn’t know,” Ken tells her glibly. “I’m not the one who programmed myself. You put the artificial in front of my intelligence.” He encompasses us both meaningfully in that ‘you’. Though thinking machines have long been banned from my planet, Lily’s planet I’m not so sure about.

“We didn’t have anything to do with you,” Lily spits at him, almost hissing mad like an animal I once saved from the quicksand on the riverbed near the village where I was raised. Lily fights nearly as fiercely as that animal.

“Thank you for the gifts,” I tell Ken swiftly, trying to appease the indeed psychotic AI. “I’m sure everyone at home who is watching will be grateful to learn they can buy whatever it is you’re selling.”

Appearing slightly mollified, Ken pats the collar of his oversized fur coat and jerks his chin at the bird’s corpse behind us. “The meat from that bird is your reward, and within the baskets you will find everything you need to prepare a meal worthy of your adventure. Though I’m sure our viewers would appreciate it if you didn’t scare the next challenge to death. But hey, I suppose that’s the reason they call them chickens.”

Laughter echoes in from all sides, and Lily and I take a moment to look at each other, completely perplexed at where the sound is coming from.

“A freaking laugh track,” she says, throwing her hands in the air. “This is absurd.”

“Well, absurd is getting us viewers,” Ken says, winking at something I still cannot see in front of the dead animal.

I sigh and rub my eyebrows with both hands, shaking my wings slightly to try and settle myself.

“Well, right on, Ken,” Lily says, her voice dripping with sarcasm that I’ve come to know all too well. Strangely, I find hearing it directed at Ken to be a complete relief, it means Lily is functioning and that she’s more annoyed with Ken than she has been with me. Delightful.

“And on that note, we’ll leave you two to it." He winks at… nothing.

Lily throws up her arms in pure frustration as Ken ignores her.