Page 33 of The Jaded Notes

She pauses for a few beats, then lifts her notebook.

“She needs to come alive.” Livianna’s voice cracks. “She has to breathe.”

“What I’m hearing you say is you want your fashion house to be a living entity.”

She places the sketchbook on the side table near her chair. “No. That’s not it.”

“Then help me understand.”

“She deserves to be seen.”

“Who?”

Livianna’s chest rises and falls in a frantic rhythm. Her wild gaze hooks with mine, and she trembles. Now she’s digging into both wrists with her pointy fingernails. The skin breaks. Blood beads to the surface.

Shit!

She’s having a panic attack.

“Here.” I pull out my purple pocket handkerchief and hold it toward her. “You’re bleeding.”

She doesn’t move. Whatever slammed into her has taken full control. I’m not sure she can hear me. She’s frozen and trying to catch her breath.

I kneel in front of her, hands steadying her shoulders, locking onto her blue eyes. “Focus on me and let everything else go.”

“Jax…” It barely escapes. “I...need air.”

Her vulnerability shakes me to my core. She needs more than air. She needs anchoring, and I know exactly what to do.

I pull her to her feet, cradle her in my arms, and rush us to the hidden elevator in the back corner of my office. It looks like an unremarkable black-sliding-door closet until it opens and the biometric monitor wakes.

The panel scans my retinas. I speak my name to complete the voice authentication.

The doors slide open, and the internal sensor reads my temperature. Inside, the lighting shifts to a deep indigo, designed to calm the nervous system.

No one but me has ever been where I’m taking her. Only two engineers even know this floor exists.

I should stop. I should keep this part of my life sealed off. But her trauma is so intense it manifests in blood. That alone strikes the deepest wounds I carry.

I step in, holding her close, as the elevator ascends. The air fills with vetiver, neroli leaf, and blue sage formulated to drop cortisol fast. Livianna’s tiny frame softens in my arms.

Once we get to the top floor, the doors open. I carry her straight into the circular, sunken meditation pit and lower her gently onto the crushed-velvet cushions. It’s lined with various white pillows and different textured weighted blankets that provide soothing comfort.

I sink back on my heels, gauging what she needs now. The lights dim to a softer ocean teal to evoke a deep calmness. She appears to be pulled out of her panic because her breathing has leveled off and she’s taking in every part of my secret weapon.

I swore nobody would ever see this side of me. And all it took to shatter my promise was the desperate desire to erase Livianna’s agony. My shoulders tense and my throat closes.

She straightens, scanning the space like she’s trying to decipher the alternate universe I just dropped her into. One sculpted with curved, seamless walls and a reality I’m not sure she believes in yet.

Her gaze finds mine, unblinking. “Jax… What is this place?”

I start to answer, but the words stick.

Because the truth is something I can’t speak out loud. Not without exposing too much. Not without risking her seeing the parts of me I’m not ready to put in her hands.

And now, I don’t know how to get myself out of the situation I’ve got myself into.

Chapter Eight