Page 26 of More Than Friends

“You’re not going to mess it up,” Charlotte says, making me wonder if she can somehow read my mind or if I said the words out loud. I look away from Ava for a moment and meet Charlotte’s reassuring stare. She smiles, and it’s just what I need. “You’ve got this,” she adds on, her smile only growing.

I swallow before looking at Ava. I tentatively bring the bottle to her lips. Her dark blue eyes stay focused on me as I place the tip of the bottle in her mouth. Before wrapping her lips around the top, her face lights up, and I swear she gives me a smile.

I smile back, wondering if what she gave me was actually a smile or if I’m just seeing things. Either way, the moment she begins to drink the milk, I let out a breath of relief.

I’m feeding my daughter.

She isn’t crying or complaining.

She’s eating.

And I swear she smiled at me.

With Charlotte’s help, it’s the first time since the moment Ava got dropped off on my doorstep that I feel like maybe I really can do this.

FIFTEEN

CHARLOTTE

“Something tellsme we’re going to be here awhile,” Jude mutters as we walk into the store. He sets Ava’s car seat into a shopping cart as I grab a second one. We’re definitely going to need the extra space.

“Babies need a lot,” I tell him, setting my notebook onto the handle of the cart so I can go over my list. I spent the entire car ride creating it, wanting to make sure I didn’t miss anything that Jude would need. I started researching baby things as he fed Ava. It was obvious he was nervous to give her the bottle at first, but he did great. His confidence started to build as he changed her diaper and got her dressed for our shopping adventure.

Figuring out how to install her car seat into the back of his luxury SUV was a different story. I don’t think I’d ever heard Jude let out so many curse words. He even watched videos about how to install the specific brand of car seat she has, but it was still a struggle.

“Where should we begin?” he asks, flipping up the visor of the infant seat to check on a sleeping Ava. He made me sit in the back seat with her on the way to the store, too nervous about how quiet she was while sleeping and wanting someone to have eyes on her.

It’s kind of adorable, but I keep that thought to myself.

It was only this morning that he found out he is a dad, and he’s already doing so well at it. It’s clear that Ava already has him wrapped around her little finger, and I feel some sort of pride at being the one to walk with Jude on this new adventure.

I look at my notes as we both begin to push our carts. He falls in line slightly behind me, letting me steer the way.

“I have things separated into needs and wants. First, I say we make it through the needs list. Some of these things we could also order online in the event that Ava wakes up and decides that maybe shopping isn’t for her.”

“What’s at the top of the needs list?” he asks. A tiny line forms at the center of his forehead, and I can’t help but love the sight of it. I’ve never seen a serious Jude. Normally, he wears a smirk at all times. But jumping into the role of being a dad has brought out this new side of him that I can’t wait to see more of.

“First and foremost, we need to find a crib. Or at least a Pack ’n Play.”

He frowns, making the line across his forehead even more noticeable. “A pack and what?”

I laugh, realizing that if you aren’t around kids a lot, you’d probably think it’s a pretty weird name. “A Pack ’n Play. It’s like a portable crib. We’re probably going to have to start with that—or a bassinet—and wait for a crib to come in.” I stop and turn my body to face him, a question popping into my head. “Have you thought about which room the nursery will be? I should’ve asked you that at the house so that I’d know the size of the room and what furniture we’ll need to order.”

Jude’s shoulders sag slightly. “Is it horrible of me to admit I hadn’t even thought about what room she’ll be in?”

I shake my head and softly place my hand on his arm. He doesn’t shy away from my touch, so I keep it there, hoping it makes him believe in what I’m about to say. “You’ve had alot thrown at you today. It’s okay if you don’t have everything figured out yet. Today, we’ll just get a portable crib of some sort and then focus on ordering nursery furniture another day when we know which room will be hers.”

Jude nods, and I fight the urge to give him a hug. His stress is obvious by the way his fingers are almost white in clutching the handle of the shopping cart. “I really don’t know how I’d be doing any of this without you,” he admits, his eyes scanning my face.

I blush under the intensity of his gaze. I look at my feet for a moment, hoping he doesn’t notice the pink that’s spreading across my cheeks. “You’d have figured it out,” I respond before pushing the cart forward. I can’t help but remember another time when he looked at me with an intensity like he just was. It was last night, seconds before our lips touched for the first—andlast—time. Jude’s got so many things going on in his life now, it feels wrong to even think about kissing him.

What he needs right now is a friend. And friends don’t think about kissing their friends. No matter how charming they are or how much they make you melt with just the intensity of their gaze.

“I’m glad I don’t have to,” Jude says from behind me.

I turn around and look at him. “What?” I was so lost in my thoughts I forgot what we were even talking about.

“I’m glad I don’t have to figure it out without you.” He gives me a smile—an unforced one—and God, it does things to my heart it shouldn’t be doing.