AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Emma clasped her hands together in her lap. She had given this man her body. She owed him her trust. Or at least an explanation. “Before I left England, a wealthy man—a governor of the school where I taught—offered to make me his mistress.”
Griff’s eyes narrowed. “The man who had you. Hurt you.”
She inhaled. “Yes.”
“I will kill him for you.”
Her breath exploded in an appalled laugh. “No! He—I—he said I led him on. I didn’t mean to. But I made assumptions, foolish assumptions about what he intended and what I wanted. It cost me my position at the school.”
“He cost you your life,” Griff growled.
“Yes.” She closed her eyes in relief, at once vindicated and reassured. Not her fault, then. Not entirely her fault. “In one day, one instant, I lost my home and my livelihood. And then Paul told me all I had to do was make my body available to him at his convenience, and I would be fed, sheltered, secure. And…I could not do it. I could not be what he wanted me to be.”
Her eyes opened, pleaded with his for understanding. “I cannot be what you want me to be, either,” she said.
“You can. You are.”
He tempted her to believe him. But she would not spoil what they had shared in the honeyed dark by dragging it into the daylight world of transactions and obligations. “I cannot eat the food from your table in return for—for—”
Griff scowled. “It is not the same thing at all.”
“I know.” And she did. From somewhere, she summoned a smile for him. Her decision was much easier—in a practical sense—because Griff was nothing like Paul. He was not like any man she had ever known before. He had lavished her with passion and tenderness. He was offering her an opportunity to do the work she loved.
Emma sighed. Of course, emotionally, his willingness to honor her wishes made her choice more difficult. “But I can’t set aside everything I believe, everything I’ve been taught, simply because your employer might be willing to overlook our—our relationship. I can’t risk making another mistake. I need time.”
He shot her a sharp look, and she winced at what he would not say. She hadn’t needed time last night.
“And if you are with child?” he asked.
Her heart pounded against her ribs. She raised her chin. “Are you offering to marry me?”
For the first time, Griff appeared disconcerted. “We do not marry. I would care for you. And the babe.”
“Let me take care of you.” The memory whispered over her skin like a touch, raising goose bumps.
Emma’s throat tightened. She was vulnerable to him in ways she could never have guessed at before last night. Everywhere he had touched her, every place he had been, tingled from his possession. He was imprinted on her flesh, pulsing in her blood. Inside, she was softer, warmer, melting. She wanted him.
Still.
But in the pale, thin light of morning, she saw herself and her options clearly. The arrangement he suggested would leave her always doubting and unsatisfied. How could she face her pupils with confidence, how could she teach them with authority, when she was living openly with the castle overseer as his mistress?
She swallowed. “I will be your mistress, or I will be the children’s teacher. I cannot be both.”
She would never have made such an offer to Paul. But then, Paul had never offered her a choice at all.
Griff held her gaze, his dark eyes smoldering.
Her breathing quickened. If he touched her…If he kissed her…
But he did neither.
“Teach, then,” he growled. “I will leave your bed. Until you ask me back to it.”
He closed the door quietly behind him, leaving her alone with her cold porridge and her cooling thoughts.
Griff lurked in the great hall, listening for the sound of Emma’s voice, cursing his duty and her stubbornness.
Conn had designated the antechamber as her schoolroom, furnishing it with mismatched tables and chairs, a globe, and a few—a very few—books. Emma had spoken with longing of a package lost in the wreck, Paradise Lost and Jane Eyre and Mrs. Beeton’s Book of Household Management. But Iestyn had contributed a Bible, a parting gift from his human father, and today the class took turns reading, copying verses onto slates.
