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I held my breath, tapped the ball gently, and watched it roll down the green and up a slight hill before dropping into the hole.
“Sweet,” I said. “That’s how it’s done.”
“Ah, you got lucky,” Andrew joked.
I agreed I appeared lucky, but I’d worked so hard to get everything in my life just the way I wanted it. And now those brat kids were going to destroy everything. That was more people I was going to have to split the money with. There would be non-stop whining and noise in the house. We’d have to pay a staff of people to care for them while we were working. And something about having two people out there that had sprung forth from me and Leia was unsettling. It was weird to think about, but it almost made me feel as if I’d lost something of myself.
Having kids was something I’d never really wanted or planned on. I was sure that I would find a way to get out of it, and now it looked as though that ship had sailed. I was going to be a father whether I wanted to be or not.
The thought of divorcing Leia and just running away from it all was so tempting, but I couldn’t do that. I’d lose a lot of the money and the prestige that I had worked so hard to obtain. Plus, there were times when being a father did appeal to me. It was possible that the kids would turn out more like Leia than like me. I wouldn’t have wanted kids like myself. I couldn’t really be trusted by anybody. Who the hell would want a kid like that?
I chuckled at the idea as I drove away from the golf course about two hours after the first phone call. Leia had called twice more since then and I’d ignored both of those calls, each one sounding more frantic than the one before. It was turning into a weird, almost sick little game for me. Let’s see how many times we can make her call! And maybe there will be some sort of a lucky emergency that would take Leia and both kids straight to hell.
“Now, then I’d consider myself lucky,” I said through my laughter.
In all seriousness I did often contemplate getting rid of Leia for good. But it would be a very risky venture. People tried to knock off their spouses all the time and hardly ever got away with it, and when they did it was usually because of inept police work which one could not always count on.
Leia was a beautiful, sweet, wonderful woman who had been a lot of fun in the beginning, but as I figured, she’d grown tired of my independent nature and she’d tried to reel me in, to domesticate me—basically, to house break me like some animal. But I have always been a wild stallion who can’t be broken. I have to roam free and do what nature calls me to do.
But for right now, I still had to play it cool. I was sitting pretty comfortably and I didn’t want to rock the boat on that.
I arrived at the hospital and located the room that Leia was in. She was already in the back room of the emergency room with a doctor and several nurses around her. One of the nurses quickly got me suited up in a pair of scrubs, a mask, and a head wrap. I felt like a mummy and I was sure I looked really silly as they led me back. As I rounded the corner into the room I prepared my frantic and worried look so that when I bounded into the room I could have the appropriate affect.
“Baby!” I hollered as I walked quickly into the back area. Leia was there with her doctor who was crouching down in front of her.
To the side I could see a nurse cleaning off a baby, wrapping the child up, and handing him to Leia. Then they did the same with the other, this time handing him to me.
“Congratulations,” the nurse said.
I took the child in my arms as I’d been forced to practice by Leia at home (I’d refused to attend most of the childbirth classes) and looked down into the eyes of my new son. He looked like a baby. His eyes were closed, he was still a bit covered in nasty fluids, and he was quiet. I always thought babies came into the world kicking and screaming, but I guess some of them just relax and calm down right away. The kid was probably hoping it was all a nightmare. Sorry to burst your bubble kid, but the nightmare is just beginning.
I tried to be excited and act like the proud papa, but honestly I was just not that interested. It was a baby. It looked like more of a job than anything. But still I held the child gingerly and pretended to dote on it and make googly faces acting every bit the part of the proud father.
