Page 62 of Happily Ever After is So Once Upon A Tim

“Right now? Go home and crawl into bed. I feel like shit.” I don’t even wait for her to say anything else. I start walking down the street, hunched over, trying to lesson this stupid pain.

She catches up to me and hooks her elbow through mine. “I have to be honest right now, Jane. With the things I just heard him say to her. I have no doubt in my mind, he’s still in love with you.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t hear any of it. So, he said none of it.” I crouch down lower and groan.

“Oh, sweetie. This was how I was feeling this morning. When we get home, I’ll give you one of my painkillers. It’ll take the edge off.”

It takes us twenty minutes to walk home. I cry the entire time. “I’m sorry about dinner.”

“It’s not your fault. I’ll order something when we get back.”

I’m shuffling my feet, taking the tiniest steps possible. “If we ever get home.”

She laughs and hugs my shoulder. “Stop, believe me I understand. Some months woman issues are no joke.”

I don’t remember the elevator ride up to our floor or how I ended up curled up on my couch with my heating pad plugged in. There’s an unopened container of Chinese food sitting on the coffee table and a bottle of pills alongside it. I hear Julia in the kitchen opening a bottle of wine and cursing at the cork that probably fell apart when she tried to take it out, like it always does.

I feel a little better. A little rest was all I needed.

There’s a light knock at my door but Julia doesn’t hear it. I toy with the idea of not answering, just closing my eyes and drifting away. Another rap, rap, rap, and then the doorknob jiggles, like it’s being opened with a key.

The door creaks open and Dex’s face appears before I let out a scream. I forgot he had a key. Warmth rushes over my skin and I start to shiver. Julia’s curses go silent.

Dex rushes in, eyes a little wild. He reeks of alcohol. “I told her about us. I told her everything. How much I love you and I didn’t want anyone else but you. I told her the truth about the DNA test and how I was waiting for the results,” the words burst out of his mouth, slurred and angry.

I try to sit up straighter but a sharp pang in my stomach stops me.

“When…when we got back, the mail came.” A sob chokes out of his mouth. He’s so drunk he stumbles against my shelves and knocks some books to the floor. He doesn’t even notice. “She’s not mine, Jane. Olivia’s not mine. My heart is fucking…”

“Oh, Dex. I’m—” I want to say I’m sorry, and I hate myself because I’m not.

“I just need to be alone for a while, okay? I’m sorry, this has nothing to do with you. I just need a fucking break.”

Julia steps into the room. She’s holding the wine bottle like she’s about to hurl it at his head. “How the fuck can you possibly be surprised about the results, Dex?”

He rakes his hands through his hand, his fingers trembling. I want to reach out to him. I want to hug him and tell him how relieved I am. I want to pour black coffee down his throat and sober him up.

He sways and leans against the wall, glaring down at me.

“How do you feel, better?” Julia asks me.

“Jesus,” he spits, incoherently. “Don’t tell me you’re going to say you’re pregnant too.” The way he says it kills me. I know he’s hurting and very intoxicated. I know he’s grieving, butfuck him. How could he?

I start to cry. Again.Such a strong person I am. “No,” I whimper. “I’m not going to say that, you stupid dick.I have cramps.” My energy is zapped and my words sound whiny and weak. “Why are you taking the paternity results out on me?”

“Because you’re the one that questioned it all, and now, she took Olivia away for good.You wanted her to not be my daughter.Well, I hope you’re fucking happy.You’re such a selfish bitch.” His expression is just as shocked by his words as I am. “Fuck.Fuck.” He stumbles back, his hands covering his mouth. “I’m sorry. Fuck. I’m so sorry. I…” His face is sheer torment.

I hate it, but he’s right. And he will never be able to forgive me for this, and I will never be able to forget that he believes I’m the selfish bitch when it was Stephanie who tried to trap him with a baby she had to know wasn’t ever his.

Right now, I hate him for all of it.

“Yeah, you should go. Straighten your head out. Sober up. Then spend the rest of your life kicking yourself in the ass for losing the one person who honestly had your back.” I toss the heating pad off me and climb off the couch. My uterus feels like it’s being torn into pieces again. I look at him and point at the door. “Just go. And lose my number!”

He stumbles out of the apartment. I slam the door behind him and press my forehead against the hard wood.

I don’t call out to him because I suddenly can’t speak, and I hear the elevator door close and I suddenly can’t breathe, and then pain is everywhere, exploding through my body until my eyes blacken at the edges and my knees hit the floor. Something stabs mercilessly through me, sharp and hot and terrifying.

The floor tilts up toward me and my shoulder slams down. I hear the thud and slap but the pain, oh God, the pain burns and bubbles up from inside me. It’s ripping through me, shredding my flesh into thin sinewy ribbons.

Julia’s voice is small and far away. She calls out my name until panicked shrieks pierce my ears. I don’t know what’s happening. There’s a frantic beat to my heart. Is this how I’m going to die? I don’t want to die like this. I try to kick my feet out, and for an instant, every organ inside me is bathed in fire and searing pain.

Then I hear voices, but my vision is too foggy to see. I think Dex is here, maybe. Did he come back? There’s a blurry image hovering over me. I call his name but nothing comes out of my mouth.

There’s a flurry of murmurs, someone breaks off in a cry, and then everything falls to silence.

And everything around me just fades to black.