Page 52 of A Very Roguish Boxing Day

A startled laugh burst from Gwen’s lips.She was still having trouble believing that Tom would really rather have her in his bed than Gracie.

But she had to admit, she did have better tits than that evil witch.

Tom shook his head.“Why did you think, even for a second, that I was going to choose her?Every word I said to her was to get the hell out.”

Gwen thought back over their conversation.“That’s true,” she acknowledged.“But then you went silent.She was laying out all the reasons the two of you could wed after all.And you didn’t say anything.I thought”—she ducked her chin—“I thought you were trying to figure out how to let me down easy.”

“I was having trouble forming words, but not for the reason you thought.My mum, Molly—you’re going to love her, by the way—she taught me how a man is supposed to talk to a woman.And suffice it to say, if I’d said half of what I was thinking, my mum would’ve taken a wooden spoon to the side of my head.Don’t think the fact that I’m the heavyweight champ would’ve stopped her.”

Gwendolyn giggled.“I am going to like her.I can tell.”

Tom rubbed the back of his head, his expression rueful.“I didn’t want you to see me like that.I was worried I might start yelling and ranting.I was biting my tongue so hard.That’s also why I asked you to excuse us.Because… well.I don’t think I quite sank into wooden spoon territory.But I told Gracie exactly what I thought of her, and I gave her to understand that I would never marry her, not if she was the last woman on the face of this earth.”He snorted.“Trust me, we won’t be seeing her again.”

Gwen’s voice felt tight, but she managed to say, “That’s good.That’s very good.”

Tom shook his head.“It really says something, that you thought I was going to up and leave you like that.And that, apparently, the only reason you thought I might want to stick around was because of your bees.”

He peered at her, brows knotted, and it struck Gwen that this was one of the rare moments when she’d seen him look nervous.“The truth is, Gwen, I would want to marry you even if your tits fell off.Even if you didn’t own a single bee.”

“Really?”Gwen squeaked.

Tom nodded, his brown eyes sincere.“Really.It’s like I was saying earlier.Gracie made me feel like so much garbage, but even after I came to London, every woman I met treated me like a piece of meat.I was just a bit of fun, a notch in their bedpost.Nobody wanted me for keeps.”

He took both of her hands in his.“But then, you came along and started telling me all of this cracked nonsense about how I was kind and honorable and considerate?—”

“But you are!”Gwen cried.“You’re all those things, Tom.You’re the finest man I’ve ever met!”

“That’s just it!”he exclaimed.“That’s who my mum raised me to be.Who I’ve been trying to be all along.But nobody sees me that way but you.Everyone else thinks I’m this dumb brute?—”

“You’re not!”Gwen said fiercely.“You are neither dumb nor a brute, and if anyone says as much in front of me, they will quickly come to regret it.”

“See?That’s why I love you.”Tom shook his head.“You make me feel like a king.I don’t want to live with fucking Gracie on her stupid farm.I just want to be here with you, in this cottage.I want to fall asleep with you in my arms, and I want to wake beside you every morning.I want to have a half-dozen children together and for us all to have a big, messy snowball fight every winter.And I want you to smile at me like I’m fucking Sir Galahad every time I lift something heavy for you.”He shrugged.“That’s all.”

She beamed at him.“I love you, too, Tom.So much.I never thought I would find someone as wonderful as you.”

She started to cry, and Tom scooped her into his lap.“Well, shit,” he muttered.“Now we’re both going to show up to our wedding with red eyes and runny noses.”

Gwen framed his beautiful face.“That’s fine by me.”

Indeed, Tom and Gwen were both a bit sniffly during the ceremony that finally took place a half-hour later.

But none of their true friends, who were present on the happy occasion, thought a thing of it.

Epilogue

The Times

September 16, 1819

NEW PURSUITS FOR THE FORMER TITLE-HOLDER

We have previously reported that Bruno Jervis defeated Donovan McLaren in seven rounds on Friday night, reclaiming the heavyweight crown the two of them have battled over since it was vacated by long-time champion Tom Talbot in January of this year.

We were able to speak with Mr.Talbot, who was on hand to witness the bout, along with his new wife.When asked if he had any regrets about his retirement from boxing, Mr.Talbot replied with his signature droll humor.“Absolutely none.It will come as a shock, but it’s not exactly a lark getting smashed in the face by either of these blokes.”

Since his retirement, Mr.Talbot has gone into the business of beekeeping.“Mrs.Talbot is the one who introduced me to it,” he explained.“She’s the brains of the operation.I just do the heavy lifting.”

Mrs.Talbot immediately objected, solemnly explaining that her husband was, “indispensable.”The couple, who are expecting their first child, appeared to be extremely happy in their union.

Mr.Talbot and his wife brought samples of their honey, Stinger’s Signature, to the bout, and both of Talbot’s former rivals shared their opinions about the product.

While Mr.McLaren’s exact words are not suitable for publication, suffice it to say, he found the honey, “delicious” and noted that he was glad indeed that Mr.Talbot, “got into the business of making honey and out of the business of punching me in my… kidneys.”

Mr.Jervis was even more effusive, especially when the time came to try the Talbots’ special blackberry honey, a small-batch product in which the bees are fed blackberry juice, resulting in a purple honey.“I think that’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted,” Mr.Jervis said.He promptly tried to buy five jars.

“Five jars?”Mr.Talbot replied in shock.“This is from our luxury line.Do you know how much it costs?Now, see here, Jervis.I’m going to give you your five jars.But it’s important at your age that you learn to stick to a budget.”Here, the interview concluded, as Mr.Talbot took young Mr.Jervis off into the corner, where they spent the next half-hour in deep conversation about the state of Mr.Jervis’s personal finances.

All varieties of Stinger’s Signature Honey are available at Fortnum & Mason, and this reporter can confirm that they are, indeed, delicious.