“That’s not helping!” I half laugh, half cry.
“Made you smile, though. So mission accomplished.”
I shake my head, even though she can’t see me. My chest still feels like someone sat on it, but it’s a little looser now. Small wins.
“I can’t believe this is my life,” I mumble.
“You say that a lot,” Harper says. “I think you’re sleeping on an opportunity here.”
“Harper.”
“I’m just saying,” she says. “The universe dropped a buffet of emotionally complicated men on your doorstep. You could at least try the appetizer.”
I already have and she knows it.
I groan again. “Stop.”
“Fine. But I’m serious. You don’t have to do anything right now. Relax. Sleep. Panic again in the morning. You’re allowed.”
I nod again, even though she can’t see that either.
We sit in silence for a second.
Then I hear her yawn. “Okay, I’m gonna fall asleep with my AirPods in again and die of brain cancer. Call me tomorrow?”
“Yeah.”
“Goodnight, disaster.”
“Goodnight, bad influence.”
I set the phone on my nightstand, then I press my palms into my eyelids and tell myself I’m fine.
It’s not true.
But maybe tomorrow I’ll believe it.
Chapter 7
Miles
People confuse me.
They say one thing, mean another, and expect you to understand both. They smile when they’re sad. Laugh when they’re angry. Pretend they’re fine when they are very clearly not.
It took me a long time to realize most people don’t want to be understood. They want to be perceived the “right” way. It’s all about optics.
I stopped trying to decode their words a while ago.
Body language speaks louder than words. That’s where the truth lives. Not in what they say, but in how they move when they think no one’s watching.
So I watch.
I stand near the patio table, close enough so it feels like I’m part of the conversation. I have a drink in hand because it’s expected of me, but I’ve only taken a few sips since Gigi shoved it at me with a syrupy smile. And I track everything.
Jude’s laughing at something Blaire just said. Her hand grazes his bicep when she reaches past him. The movement is designed to look accidental, but it was clearly done with intention. She’s calibrated every movement to signal interest.Her smile is a few degrees wider than necessary. Her posture is open, tilted slightly toward him. She’s making it look unrehearsed, but it’s not.
She’s trying to pull his focus to her.