Page 120 of Rogue Alpha Prince
She shakes her head ‘no’.
I nod to myself, content, and drag her to our bedroom where I know a hot bath awaits. I asked my servants to prepare it for Ash while she had dinner.
We enter. Heavy rain is pounding on the closed balcony doors. It would be very dark if the servants hadn’t left the lamp on by the bathtub. Asher still holds to my body like it is the only thing keeping her together. She’s so distressed, but quiet and shut down—it’s nothing like her mental breakdown from this morning. God, is it still the same day?
“Did he do anything to you?”
She clears her throat.
“He mostly talked about some disturbing things that I tried to, you know, ignore. Then he pinned me to the wall, but you told me not to attack him, so I couldn’t even push him off me, and he was so close and started to grope me…” She shudders at the memory, and it makes me wrap my hands around her shoulders, and hug her almost as tightly as she was holding me in the hall. “He observed me.”
“What do you mean?” I furrow my brows.
“He told me I looked cute with a pup, or something like that. But he wasn’t there in the dining hall, right? What does he even do all day? He’s never around, even at meals.”
“I don’t know. Fuck, kill, laugh, repeat?”
She burrows her face in her hands, right in front of my chest, and groans in frustration. “I definitely didn’t look cute with a pup. I looked lost. I felt lost. I don’t even know if I want to have any pups. I mean, we have to have it one day, but I just know I will be a horrible, absent mom.”
She did look cute with a pup, but I won’t tell her that.
“If by absent, you mean carrier driven, it doesn’t have to mean horrible… And what are you even talking about? You are a Luna, you’ll be natural.”
“No, that’s where you’re wrong,” she says bitterly, and looks up into my eyes. “I’m not a Luna. I’m an Alpha. I don’t want Luna's duties. I want your duties.”
I look sideways. I know where she’s coming from, and that she doesn’t mean to actually act on it. She had to forgo that path when she chose this arranged marriage for the peace of her people. And something tells me she will always do whatever she needs to do for them, just like I will.
I don’t know what to tell her, though. Will it be enough for her personal ambitions if I give her an official Officer position in my pack? It’s not being a King but…
I try to stepaway from her, but she doesn’t let me go. I sigh deeply and manage to take my sword out and put it on my desk.
She’s still shaken by the encounter with my father, or rather, what would have happened if I didn’t come as quickly as I did.
I feel so guilty about this whole situation. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t—”
She puts a finger to my mouth to stop me from talking. When she looks at my lips, I see the lust in her beautiful grey eyes. That’s all it takes to completely lose my cool and just kiss her.
She gives access to my tongue, but it’s not enough. I want to feel her naked body warming up against mine. I reluctantly stop the kiss, and start undressing us without words—Ash never stops staring into my eyes, or let go of me for real. No, she’s clinging to me, however she can, even when she has to put both her hands up for me to take off her shirt. I notice the steam from the corner of my eye and I start leading her to it.
We move together toward the bathtub, leaving a messy trail of clothes and knives on the wooden floor.
I step into the hot water and sit down before pulling her onto my lap, her back to my chest. Water almost overflows when I submerge even deeper. I rest my head on the rim of the tub, and she snuggles into me, resting hers on my shoulder. We don’t talk, we don’t need to. I mindlessly roam my hands all over her hourglass body—trying to decide if I even want to talk about all the stuff we should talk about.
“Cain?”
“Mmm.”
“I meant what I said earlier. I’ll always come back to you, so don’t bother leaving me again.”
I don’t even want to entertain the thought of her coming back because of actual feelings for me. Why can’t I be content with her just being scared of me, and determined to make it work no matter what? It should be enough. But it’s not. I want her to wantme.
I pull her even closer, and burrow my nose into her hair.
She fits so perfectlyin my arms that it scares me. She holds power over me that no one has before. I’m falling so hard for her, that I don’t know if there is any hope left for me. She is already my weakness, and we are not even mates.
She is my only weakness.
I slip my arm around her neck, my biceps pressing to her throat. She elongates her claws—but my hold is so tight—when the first deprivation of oxygen hits her, her claws retract without even scratching me.
