Page 26 of Espresso Your Love
“Exactly.”
We take our seats in the town hall. Cassie is next to me with Ashley on the other side of her. Townspeople banter back and forth, gavels hammering, and the mayor calling for order. I don’t know why I’d ever doubtGilmore Girls. The meeting is exactly like the television shows makes it out to be. Sadie is going to freak out.
I lean over to Cassie. “Did you bring the popcorn?” I whisper playfully.
She covers her hand over her mouth to suppress her laughter.
I lean in. “Is it always like this?”
She nods and whispers, “Pretty much.”
Her breath brushes along my neck, sending shivers down my spine. My heart rate picks up, but not like when I’m in a dangerous situation on the job. No, this is a different kind of danger. Danger of falling. I resist the urge to turn and look at her, knowing our faces would be centimeters apart if I did.
Suddenly, Cassie bumps into me, and I look over to her. Ashley looks towards us and whispers, “Keep it down over there, you two,” then winks at Cassie.
There’s a blush on Cassie’s cheeks now, but she doesn’t move away from me. Her arm is now pressing against mine. Another good sign that my judgment is correct, this is not one-sided.
I try to focus on the meeting as an older woman takes votes on whether or not another bench should be added to the town square. But my eyes keep traveling back to Cassie. I watch her through my peripheral vision, trying to be subtle. Her eyes flicker towards me, and she smiles. She caught me.
“What’s your opinion on the bench, Ryan?” she whispers with a hint of amusement in her voice.
“You can never have too much seating,” I respond as even toned as possible.
She chuckles and nudges my arm.
Cassie’s presence is filling me with unexplainable energy. All my reservations are gone. I had started to think she wasn’t interested or was avoiding me, but the way she’s engaging with me now—the way she looks at me with those piercing eyes—there has to be something between us.
I have no doubts about it now. It’s decided. Tonight, when I walk her home, I’ll take step two: ask her out.
9
Cassie
I’ve been successfully resisting Ryan. Resisting the thoughts, dreams, and any hopes for more—because this is not the time. This is not the place. This is…completely ruining my streak of Ryan-free thoughts.
I was already nervous when he asked to walk with me to the town meeting. Then I thought,what can happen in ten minutes?Well, I’ll tell you. A lot. A whole lot of lot. A sea full of lot.
I limited the conversation—no teasing, no lingering stares, festival talk only. I fooled myself into thinking I could. But the walls started crumbling down by a simple town meeting.
Walk together to the town meeting? Sure, easy peasy. Then he asked me about the festival and my love for this event and this town betrayed me. I resisted at first and then the words came tumbling out of me. He asks questions, and I answer. I feel comfortable around him, and that’s my problem. When I feel comfortable around people, they can’t shut me up.
Then we get to the meeting and I think I’ll be fine because Ash is next to me. We’ll pay attention to the meeting, and I’ll be set.
Wrong.
With Ryan sitting next to me, I felt like my whole body had been engulfed in flames. I was hyper-aware of every movement he or I made. When I caught him watching me, I knew that this wasn’t a simple friendship between us. He was drawn to me as much as I was drawn to him. This is something more.
I was looking forward to walking home with him, but that’s when it went downhill. The mayor called me over for something that could have waited, but I couldn’t get away. Dodging his endless conversations is an art form that I haven’t perfected.
By the time I could sneak away, Ryan was gone. Which is for the best anyway; I need to stay focused on this event. I had work to finish up after the meeting anyway. So that’s what I did…walked home alone mopey and half-heartedly worked. It was worse than my fake-typing skills. I accomplished nothing, but the inner torment going on inside from my heart saying yes to possibility and my brain saying no.
And now I’m lying in bed replaying the events of yesterday over and over. I want to feel the butterflies again. I want blood to rush to my cheeks because of him. I want to hear the deep sound of his laughter.
I sigh and roll out of bed. I’m training for the Turkey Trot marathon on Thanksgiving morning. Am I crazy? Maybe. But I think it will be fun. This last year, I got into running more and really enjoy it. It’s a great way to clear my mind and give me sustained energy throughout the day.
I throw on my workout clothes, grab my Air Force hat, and glance in the mirror. I know I'm going for a run and will come back looking disheveled but feeling confident in my outfit somehow makes my run better.
I put my headphones in as I lock my door. The walk to the park is the perfect distance to get warmed up. My mind wanders back to Ryan. I’m too comfortable around Ryan, it’s charmingand unnerving at the same time. I pick up the pace and turn up my music to drown myself out. I reach the park and start to run.
