Page 100 of Red King
The sorrow that bubbles up to the surface is so unexpected that it takes my breath away for a few moments.
Paisley must see it on me because she pushes out a heavy breath.
“Arctic,” she whispers my name. “I’m so sorry.” She pulls me back into a hard hug, and I dissolve into her arms. I fall apart like I never have in my life. I fall apart like I should have done when I lost Anya.
I crack.
I tear.
I break.
I break into a thousand pieces but it’s okay because she’s there to catch each and every one.
27
Arctic
I open my eyes. Sun streams through the window, making me wince. Why didn’t I close the blinds last night?
I pull in a deep breath and get a noseful of Paisley.
She sighs and snuggles up even closer. Paisley is wrapped around me, and I’m just as wrapped around her. We’re in my bed.
What time is it?
I don’t want to look. I don’t want to care about anything but this. I feel…good. Maybe good is being too optimistic, but I certainly feel much better than I have in a very long while.
Paisley mutters in her sleep. And because I can’t put it off any longer, I carefully look across at the old clock on the far side table.
“Shit,” I whisper.
Paisley lifts her head. “What? What is it?” She sits up, still fully clothed, blinking her eyes against the harsh light of the day.
“It’s um…it’s late. Don’t you have somewhere you need to be?” I sound like an asshole. I’m not used to being nice. It’s been a while…too long. I push some hair off her face, tucking it behind her ear. “Don’t get me wrong. I like that you’re here. I don’t want you to get into trouble, that’s all. It’s already half past nine.”
She doesn’t flinch. “Oops! I had planned on leaving last night, but I must have passed out at some point.” Her cheeks turn rosy. “And…no, I don’t need to be anywhere. I called in sick. I messaged Dr. du Pont last night after you fell asleep to let him know I wouldn’t be in. I messaged Steel, too. Sally knows that you’re taking a rest day.”
I start to sit up. “No, that’s not possible. I need to—”
“Mistveil isn’t going to fall apart if you stay home for a day, Arctic. You’re important, but you’re not that important.”
I laugh. “When you put it like that.” I lean in and kiss her mouth, brushing my lips over hers. “Thank you for coming, and thank you for staying. You’re right; I needed someone…I needed you.” The admission just slips out.
“You should let people in more, especially when you’re in such a dark place. If not me, then Steel. We’re your friends. I mean, I’m not a close friend like he is, but—”
“Actually, I’d say you’re the closer friend. I wouldn’t bring my dick anywhere near Steel.”
She laughs. “You know what I mean.”
“I know. I’m sorry I broke down like that. Sorry that you had to see me so—”
She puts a finger over my mouth, shutting me up. “You never have to apologize for feeling. For venting. For letting all of the hurt out. I’m glad I was here. I’m glad you trusted me enough to be at your most vulnerable. It means a lot to me.”
I take her hand and kiss the palm. “It means a lot to me that you were here. That you forced Steel into bringing you. That you wouldn’t back down. If not for you, I don’t think I would have allowed myself to feel the pain…the hurt. I would have buried all of those emotions under hate and anger like I always have. I appreciate you, Paisley. You mean a lot to me.”
I probably shouldn’t be saying all this. I can’t help it because it’s true.
Paisley pulls off her top and unclasps her bra.
