Page 119 of Crucible
“You need to slow down. We still don’t know if she can be trusted, and Zeke is still an issue. You’re going to split eventually, and he’s still very fragile.”
“Stop saying that,” I snap unintentionally. “Zeke’s stronger than you know.”
“Sure, but what’s going to happen when he’s ready to wake up? Have you thought about that? Have you figured out what you’re going to do if you have to choose between them?”
“What do you mean?”
“When Zeke wakes up, and he can’t handle the fact that she’s around, you know what we’ll have to do, Seth.”
“Thanatos?” Khalil nods solemnly instead of rolling his eyes like he usually does whenever I mention the God of death, and I feel the blood drain from my face. “No.”
“Yes.”
“No, fuck that. Zeke won’t take her from me. He owes me that much.Itook his pain! I did!”
“I know that,” Khalil snaps, his face tightening a moment later with guilt and pity.
Khalil reaches out to try to put a comforting hand on my shoulder, but I move away. “How can you even say this after all that’s happened? Aurelia’s ours. She’s one of us.”
“She doesn’t want to be.”
I shake my head only to realize he’s right. She doesn’t. “We can change that.”
“How, Seth?” He looks down at the flowers in my hand with scorn and then raises his brows. “It’s a little late for hearts and flowers, don’t you think?”
“No.” Shrugging off my pack, I pull out the fantasy book I’d read to Sunshine last night and find the last page I’d read before slipping the stems inside so that the heads stick out the top like a bookmark. It’s not foolproof. The petals might still be crushed, but it’s the best I can do.
As I’m closing the book, the winter aconite catches my eye.
The even number of golden petals reminds me of Sunshine’s hair, so I remove it from the bunch before closing the book and stuffing it back inside my pack.
Khalil and I start walking again while I stare at the flower in my hand.
Before I can stop myself, I’m plucking the first petal.
She loves me.
It floats away in the wind, but I don’t watch it go.
She loves me not.
The second poisonous petal follows the first.
She loves me.
One by one, the petals fall until I reach the last.
She loves me not.
Frowning down at the empty pistil, I don’t realize I’ve fallen behind until Khalil glances behind him and calls my name with a sigh. Throwing the flower stem down, I crush it under my heel as I catch up.
Aurelia may not love me yet, but that can change.
It has to.
Because I’m already in love with her.
“Seth,” Khalil calls when he notices my despondency.
