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They rode up in silence and he waited while she took out a key and opened the door. The penthouse was dark inside.
“Thanks again,” she said, going in and feeling around for a light.
“Here, let me help you find the switch.” He stepped forward into the apartment.
The door shut on its own behind him.
As he patted the wall, he leaned to the right just when she stepped to the left. Their bodies touched in the dark.
Gray froze. So did she.
The city's ambient glow was coming in through the windows across the room, and now that his eyes had ad?justed, he could make out the lines of her face. The curves of her body.
Damn it, she was so close, he could smell her.
Get out of this apartment, he thought. Right now.
“Gray?” she whispered.
“What?” He was surprised he could get the word out. His jaw was so tight, he figured he'd need a crowbar to eat again.
“You're right about being away from home and feel?ing impulsive.”
He let out his breath. Thank God, she saw things rea?sonably.
“And if we were anywhere near the lake, I would never ask you this.” She looked up at him. “But will you kiss me? Just once? I've wanted to know what it would be like for.. .a while. No strings. Nothing weird. Just a kiss.”
Gray's body slammed into overdrive.
“That's not a good idea,” he said roughly.
She looked down. “I know. Forget I askedÑ”
“Because I don't know if I'll be able to stop.”
Her face lifted.
“Oh, God, Joy.” His voice didn't even sound like his own. It was as thick as his blood had become. “You are so damned beautiful.”
“I'm glad you like the dress.”
“Screw the dress. It's got nothing to do with what you're wearing.”
She reached out and put her hand on his lapel. “Kiss me. Once. Please.”
That did it. He couldn't turn away. He just didn't have the willpower.
Gray moved in close, smoothing back her hair and then taking her face in his hands. Her lips parted and her eyes closed as he tilted back her head. He felt her body go completely still. She didn't seem to breathe at all. It was as if she had focused all her energy on what was about to come.
Frankly, he felt humbled.
Stroking her cheek with his thumb, he bent down, keep?ing his eyes on her face. He put his mouth softly on hers.
That was all he intended. Really.
Except the slight shudder that went through her was so erotic, he kissed her lightly again. Just a stroke of mouth on mouth with hardly any pressure at all behind the contact. Her hands crept up his chest and linked around his neck.
He brought his lips back down and this time he wasn't quite so gentle. In response, she leaned into him, her body coming against his. The fit of her fulfilled every idiotic clich? he'd ever heard. Lock and key. Hand and glove.
He wondered what taking her would feel like and imagined himself inside of her. Buried deep. Moving.
Dear God. The moving.
Gray heard a groan and realized it had come out of him. Before he could stop himself, he dug his hands into her hair and slipped his tongue into her mouth. She was so sweet, he almost hit the floor. A combination of the spearmint tea she'd had for dessert and something that was altogether her.
Her hands gripped his shoulders and he put his arms around her, bringing her hard against his body. Thigh to thigh, chest to breast, he absorbed the soft feel of her while backing her against the wall.
“I've got to go,” he said over her mouth before kiss?ing her again.
His hands skimmed her waist and h*ps and the dress was a flimsy barrier between him and her body. He could feel every bit of her as he slid his hands around her rib cage and paused under her br**sts.
“Damn it...” he moaned against her lips. “We have to stop.”
But he only kissed her harder, urgency getting the better of him. And instead of pulling away, she wrapped one leg behind his calf and rubbed him.
His control snapped.
Joy had always imagined it would be like this with Gray.
She was up against the wall, his hard body all over hers, his lips and tongue doing spectacular things to her mouth, his touch hot and a little rough. When his hand found her breast, she called out his name.
“Tell me to stop,” he said hoarsely. “Please.”
“Never.”
With a groan of frustration, he gripped the leg she'd wrapped around his, bending it up to his h*ps and sink?ing his lower body into hers. She felt his arousal, thick and hot, and grabbed onto his backside, pulling him even closer. His hand shot underneath the dress's skirt, running up her thigh until he got to the garter belt she'd borrowed.
When his fingers reached the bare skin of her upper leg, he said something incoherent against her lips. And then his mouth was moving over hers again.
She was too inexperienced and overwhelmed to do anything more than hold on to him as he unleashed him?self on her body. But he didn't seem to need anything more from her. No, he knew exactly what to do.
“Which bedroom are you in?” he asked.
“Down the hall. Second door. Left.”
He scooped her up and started walking.
As he strode along, his face was familiar and strange at the same time. It was still the same bones, still the same dark hair framing the features, but arousal had trans?formed him. His eyes were dilated, almost unseeing. His brows were down tight. His skin was flushed and his breath was punching out of his mouth.
Looking at him, she thought about telling him she was a virgin, but the last thing she wanted was to give him an excuse to put a lid on their passion. It was her body. Her choice to have him. Besides, she was familiar enough with sex to know she was so turned on it wasn't going to hurt that badly. Maybe he wouldn't even know.
Gray kicked open the door to her room and carried her over to the queen-size bed. After he laid her down, he shut them in, throwing the lock.
There was no going back, she thought as she watched him come at her. He was going to stay and make love to her. And yes, he was probably going to leave and never look back. And yes, she would be devastated.
But she had him right now.
Looming over her, he tore off his jacket and tossed it onto a chair. Then he wrenched his tie from his neck.
Her body arched up for him as he joined her on the bed.
“Are you sure, Joy?” he asked. “Are you sure you want this?”
She nodded and buried her hands into his thick hair. “Oh, yes. I am very sure.”
He closed his eyes for a moment.
And then he kissed her.
The dress melted away under his hands. He seemed to know precisely how to work the zipper and buttons and she tried not to think about how many women he must have undressed to be that fast.
Any such preoccupation flew from her mind as he looked at her body. He was positively reverent and he slowed down, touching her softly, stroking her neck and her collar bone and then moving downward.
He kissed her again, his tongue sliding into her mouth, and she felt his palm on her breast, the sensation jolting her back off the bed. When his lips sought out her nip?ple, she was utterly gone, incoherent, lost in him.
So she was only dimly aware that one of his hands had moved between her legs.
At least until he touched her heat.
“Gray!”
He lifted his head, his hooded eyes conflicted. “Am I going too fast?”
“I love you,” she breathed.
“What?” His eyes peeled open with shock.
She winced. Oh, no. She couldn't possibly have let that out.
But when she looked up at him, she saw she wasn't the only one cringing. God, if he were any more horri?fied, they could have used his expression as a Halloween mask.
“Nothing. It was nothing,” she said in a rush. Then she covered her face with her hands.
Oh, sure, she wasn't about to rush into the whole Virgin Speech. But she was more than willing to kill the moment with the only other thing that could hit a man like cold water.
I love you.
As Gray jumped off the bed, she grabbed the duvet and covered herself up. It seemed only fair considering he was making a beeline for his jacket and tie.
“Listen, I really need to go,” he said, back to her.
Yeah, I bet you do, she thought.
She wanted to tell him that she hadn't meant it, but nothing she could say now could change the effect of the words. Nothing was going to get them back to where they'd been.
And calling more attention to what had come out of her mouth was not going to help anyway. At this point, it would be like looking at a mushroom cloud on the ho?rizon and saying, “Hey, you don't suppose a bomb just went off? Maybe we need to get moving here.”
Besides, he really should leave. There were a couple of things she had to get to urgently. Like throw?ing up in the bathroom. Bursting into tears. That sort of thing.
He paused at the door. Looked back at her. “You are...”
Go ahead, she thought. Say it.
She was a total fool. She'd embarrassed them both. God, why had she let those words come out of her mouth?
“I'm sorry,” she said.
He shook his head. “You're not the one who should be apologizing. I am. I should never have let things go so far.”
“Let's just forget this ever happened, okay?”
“Yeah. Let's...do that.”
The moment the door closed silently behind him, Joy shot off the bed and went for the shower. Under a blis?tering-hot spray, she scrubbed the makeup off her face and washed her skin as if in doing so she could go back to the start of the evening.
She paused with the bar of soap on her upper arm.
Or at least back to the part where Gray was on top of her, his eyes wild, his breathing labored, his big body straining to get into hers.
She closed her eyes. He had felt so good.
He'd been a taste of ecstasy.
Why did she have to go and make a mess out of ev?erything? Hell, he probably thought she had stalker tend?encies. Or was after his money.
And she'd proven she was about as sophisticated as a root vegetable.
One shot. And she'd blown it completely.
Gray stalked into his suite at the Waldorf.
She hadn't meant it. She couldn't possibly have meant it.
But then he thought of her eyes staring up at him be?fore she'd realized what she'd said. They'd been glow?ing. She'd believed the words when they'd left her mouth.
Sweet girl. Beautiful, sweet Joy.
What a mess.
Although, man, he couldn't remember ever being so turned on. She'd been like warm honey under his mouth and hands, her skin softer than any he'd touched, her scent more delicious than any perfume. She'd made him feel male all the way down to his chromosomes. Hot. Hard. Powerful. Every time her breath had come out in a hiss or her body had surged under him, he'd wanted all of her. He'd wanted to take everything she was offering and then demand more. He'd wanted to consume her, burn her up from the inside and catch fire himself.
So thank God she'd spoken when she had. If she was naive enough to confuse great sex with emotions, she was absolutely the wrong woman for him.
Not that he'd ever doubted it.
But damn it, leaving her had been so hard. He'd hated the look of mortified embarrassment on her face as he'd bolted for the door. He'd wanted to tell her she had noth?ing to be ashamed of. That she was beautiful and he was running from her because he had to, because it was the right thing to do. Because she deserved to be treated with respect.
Except as he'd stood at the door, he'd been tongue-tied. And quite sure that if he stayed a moment longer, he just might have gone back to her.
At least they were driving up to Saranac Lake together tomorrow. In the daylight, he'd tell her everything he hadn't been able to tonight. He'd make it right be?tween them.
As Gray took off his clothes, he caught a whiff of her perfume on his shirt. The scent hardened him again and brought back the kind of images he knew damn well were going to keep him up all night long.
