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“But you hated it,” she murmured.
“No!” Matt took her left hand in both of his. Some of her warmth had already disappeared. “I didn’t hate it.” But he’d known it was wrong. Known it from the moment her tongue brushed against his. He’d tried to tell himself it was because he was nervous, because it was his first time or because he was doing it wrong. He’d lied to himself.
His love for Patty might have been enough for a single spark, but it never ignited the fire he knew he should feel.
Meanwhile, with Robby, sparks were starting to shoot all over the place.
Patty groaned. “For future reference,I didn’t hate itisn’t exactly a glowing endorsement. Why won’t you just come out and admit you’re gay? Stop lying to yourself.”
Was that what he was doing?
It’s not like he spent his nights jerking off to gay porn or exchanging pictures of his privates with strangers online. Yes, he’d had a passing attraction to guys here or there, but the same was true with women. It just never held up to deeper scrutiny.
He closed his eyes, and Robby’s face wove itself into the darkness. His kiss echoed in his bones.
Almost never.
His tingle of attraction for Robby Jordan showed no signs of blinking out yet. In fact, the more they hung out, the harder it got to ignore. And after last night, he doubted he ever could.
His lips parted in an unbidden smile…and froze as Patty’s breath fanned across his cheek.
Chapter TEN
Robby
Robby squinted at the GPS on his phone as Siri’s version of a British man told him to turn right. A little warning would have been nice. He had no way of turning from the center lane.
He fumed. Something vaguely familiar about the neighborhood nagged at him, but he was too wired to give it much thought. Besides, directions had never been his strong suit.
“Please proceed to the route.” How could an automated voice sound sexy and judgmental at the same time?
Technically, it was possible Siri did warn him about the turn half a mile back. It usually did. His mind had been elsewhere, though.
Bailing on Matt this morning had been a mistake. He’d made up the thing about having errands to run, afraid to face the aftermath of their kiss. He’d only felt the overriding neednotto be there when the guy woke up.
He’d driven to the animal shelter and spent the morning playing with dogs. The joy and unfettered love those pups gave settled him like nothing else could. No one wanted them; chances were, at least for some of them, his was the only attention or affection they would have in a day. It was humbling, heartbreaking, and affirming all at once. And it left absolutely zero time to wallow in his own insecurities.
But all good things had to come to an end. When the shelter closed for lunch, he had to go home and face the music.
The sofa had still held a trace of Matt’s cologne, but it had been the only sign the man had spent the night. He’d sat on the center cushion and hugged the throw-pillow to his chest, reliving each glorious minute of the night before.
Why had he bailed this morning?
Not because he didn’t want to see Matt, but because he didn’t want to see the look on his face when he regretted their kiss. Gracious, their kiss. He couldn’t get it out of his head, no matter how he tried to occupy his thoughts with other things. Because now he knew the texture of the man’s lips. The feeling of Matt’s surrender against him.
He craved more.
His lapse in self-control could have ruined their friendship. He didn’t have it in him to wish it undone, but what if Matt did? What if they couldn’t go back and they couldn’t go forward?
Two hours of unproductive panicking later, he drove to face his fears. If Matt wanted to blow him off, the hit would be better coming outside of work. He would have time to process it alone, if he had to. It would be better than having to paste on a pretend smile to hide the disappointment in front of his friends.
Brick would burn the world if he thought someone had hurt him. It warmed his heart, but he didn’t want Matt to face his buddy’s wrath over a little awkward regret.
“Please proceed to the route.” Siri’s inflection didn’t change, but it sure felt like the phone was fussing at him.
“I’mgoing.” Gripping the wheel, he turned into a gas station parking lot to reorient himself and get back on track. The bar was just two more minutes away.
Without any other navigational drama, he found the place and parked. Cars packed the parking lot, but with Closing Time in a strip mall, there was no telling which business had the lion’s share of the customers. Hopefully, Matt wouldn’t be too busy.
