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I’m so tired,I can’t keep my eyes open.
Weak.
It takes effort to focus on moving. Everything feels heavy.
I’ll just lie here and count my heartbeats. That sounds like something I can do without too much work.
How can I be this calm? Like the stress of the world doesn’t bother me anymore.
I just want to sleep.
So I do.
Drifting in and out, I have no idea how much time passes. It just takes more work every time I struggle to look around, I finally just give up.
A loud bang almost startles me enough to open my eyes.
But not quite.
Kirill’s deep voice almost pierces the fog. “Fuck. We can’t let her die, that isn’t the plan. We need information.”
Muffled sounds resemble an exchange, but I can’t understand the words.
I don’t care.
“We aren’t ready to fight Mikhail, not yet.” His smooth fingers slap against my cheek.
My eyelids flutter weakly letting in a flash of light.
Then darkness.
“Shit. She hasn’t eaten this whole time?” he growls across the room.
“No, boss.” The clown moves closer.
Kirill hits me again, harder. “Wake up,” he commands.
I can’t.
When the footsteps fade, I’m sure I’ll be left alone again.
Good. I’m enjoying the lack of dreams. I guess my body thinks that takes too much energy too.
It’s interrupted by rough hands jerking me upwards.
“Open your mouth.”
No.
I’m too weak to utter the word.
Hard fingers dig around my jaw, trying to pry it apart far enough for something hard pressing against my lips.
Every bit of strength in my body goes to keeping my teeth firmly shut.
Screw him. He isn’t going to win this battle of wills.
I’ve been doing this my whole life.
