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He slammed down the laptop lid, shoved back from the table, and walked out the back door. Sick at heart and emotionally gutted, Rafe headed for a bench in Kristi’s flower garden.
He’d handled hard things as a SEAL and an FBI agent, but knowing Kristi had endured a nightmare at a young and impressionable age tore him to shreds. How had she emerged from that experience whole and healthy? Yeah, she was afraid of the dark. People who weren’t traumatized as a kid had the same fear. Kristi was strong, but was she strong enough to go the distance with him?
He dragged a hand down his face. The fact that he was considering a permanent relationship with Kristi told him how deep she’d burrowed into his heart.
A whisper of sound alerted him to one of his teammates approaching. Jon sat on the other end of the bench. He remained silent for a few minutes. Finally, he glanced at Rafe. “Want to talk or should I mind my own business and enjoy the sunshine?”
Rafe gripped the edge of the bench. “I read her FBI file.”
“Ah.” Jon kept his gaze on the colorful vista in front of them. “How bad?”
“The worst.” He tore his gaze from the flowers and looked at his teammate. “One of the kidnappers was a child molester. Repeat offender.”
Jon’s jaw hardened. “Did they catch him?”
Throat tight, he nodded. “I want to follow up on every man involved in her first kidnapping. While one of them being involved in this kidnapping isn’t likely, it’s another line to tug.”
“Want help?”
“Not yet. Your searches on Ward and Stewart take precedence along with the information on her former security detail. If I run into a roadblock, I’ll let you know.”
“That kind of trauma never goes away,” Jon murmured. “Time helps but the memories leave scars.”
“How do I help her?”
“Be a sounding board when she needs it. Hold her when memories and nightmares crowd reality. Understand that her darkness phobia will likely stay with her for life.”
“Doesn’t seem to be enough. After what she went through, I’m amazed Kristi allows me to touch her. She’s a walking miracle and the strongest person I know.”
“High praise.”
“Absolute truth.”
Jon looked at him. “She’ll have to be strong to survive the danger circling around her, and to handle a relationship with you.”
He flinched. “I won’t hurt her.”
“I was referring to our career. Being involved with an operative isn’t for the faint of heart.”
“She can handle it.” But would she want to?
Jon stood. “I have the names of the men assigned to your woman’s protection detail.” His lip curled. “Most of them aren’t worth their pay.”
“I’m not surprised.” Rafe rose. “Show me.”
They returned to the kitchen, and Rafe sat beside Jon as his teammate called up the first file.
“Roderick Hale.” Jon clicked on the picture of the unsmiling man. “This guy’s a real prince. Dishonorably discharged from the Army for assaulting fellow soldiers and civilians. Some of the injuries were severe enough to land people in a hospital for weeks. Hale hired on with Ward Security four years ago. Same track record. Run-ins with the law and some complaints by principals.”
Rafe stared. “I’m surprised he still has a job. Why did Ward assign him to Kristi?”
“He’s built like a Mack truck and is trained to fight. He was on duty the night Kristi was kidnapped in Gatlinburg.”
His hand fisted. “Are you serious?”
“Hale and his partner, Fleming, were in the bar, tying one on.”
“They should be fired,” Rafe muttered.
