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“Do you really have a question about the mileage form?” Porter asked.
“No,” I said and stood up.
It seemed like my hidden agenda was out in the open, and nobody cared. I waited for Porter to pull some of that pseudo big-brother bullshit about messing with Aly, but he didn’t. Apparently, me being Gina’s actual brother counted for something and I was being given the benefit if the doubt.
I hiked back down to the barn and worked out the rest of my shift, catching a ride home with Danny. That night, I considered going back to the park. Allison had offered to meet me again, though she hadn’t said what time. I remembered encouraging her to get some sleep instead, so I figured she probably wasn’t walking around waiting for me. Still, it made me anxious to think of her alone in the dark. I took my time walking around midnight and found the park empty. I sat on a bench and waited until around one. When no one showed up except a couple of high school boys with a six pack, I walked home.
Thursday, I asked Danny to stop at the grocery store on the way back from one of our runs. Always in the mood to goof off, he agreed. I wandered through the aisles, wondering what was fancy enough to bring to dinner. I wanted something that said that I cared, but I wasn’t willing to go out of my way to get it.
“What are we looking for?” Danny asked.
“I got invited to see my sister,” I answered, scanning the refrigerated section. “I gotta bring something to dinner tonight.”
“Chips and salsa?” Danny suggested.
I shrugged. “Why not?” I knew alcohol was out of the question, and chocolate seemed too corny. Chips and salsa would be something everyone could dig in to, a contribution to the night’s meal. It wasn’t much in the way of an “I haven’t seen you in eight years” gift, but I didn’t think they printed up cards for things like that. On second thought, I grabbed a bouquet of flowers.
“For your sister?” Danny asked, skeptical.
“I haven’t seen her yet,” I said. “I think she’s a little pissed that I’ve been back and I haven’t stopped by.”
He nodded. “That makes sense.”
I took my grocery bag up the hill to Aly’s office. “Can I leave these here?” I asked, finding her alone.
“Sure,” she said warily before she had a chance to investigate my request.
I set the bag down behind her in a corner, the flowers sticking up past the bag of tortilla chips. “They’re for Gina,” I mumbled awkwardly. I should have bought another bouquet for Aly. Damn.
She twisted in her chair to see what I was talking about and her eyes softened. She didn’t look angry that I hadn’t thought of her too. She looked pleased that I had considered Gina’s feelings. Frustration must have been written on my face because she laughed.
“That’s sweet of you to buy her flowers,” Aly said, relieving me of the responsibility of worrying about offending two women at once.
“I should have gotten something for the baby,” I considered aloud. It turned out I was really bad at this gift-giving thing.
“The flowers and the chips are fine,” Aly said soothingly. “What’s most important is that you show up.”
“It’s been eight years since I’ve seen her.” I went quiet, still standing behind the desk just inches from the back of Aly’s chair.
She reached up to take my hand, gliding her thumb gently over my knuckles. “Gina just wants to see you. You don’t have to be nervous.”
I squeezed her hand. She was being too kind. I wasn’t comfortable with affection, and I was worried that this evening was going to be more than I could handle. Getting Aly into bed was one thing. Falling in love with her was something entirely different.
I scooted out from behind the desk and went back to work. When my shift was over, I went back to collect my groceries and found Aly gone. There was a note on her desk that said, “See you tonight,” with a giant heart in the background.
Warning bells went off in my mind. Was I getting too close? Had I made a mistake kissing her? I wanted to get to know her, but I didn’t want to get involved in a meaningful relationship. I was too broken. I wasn’t the right guy for her, and I knew it. Still, I decided to take the heart as an invitation to do wicked things, rather than a declaration of love. It was better that way. I grabbed the note so that no one else would see it and stuffed it in my bag.
Porter came downstairs just as I was letting myself out the front door. “Hang on. I’ll drive.”
My only other option was an Uber, and I had long since made a pact with myself where rideshares were concerned. Until I could save up money to buy my own car, I was going to accept every free ride that was offered to me. It didn’t matter if I was uncomfortable or if the driver in question went out of their way. I was too poor to funnel all of my cash into being independent.
I followed Porter to his truck and hopped in.
“What’s that?” Porter pointed to my bag.
“Chips and salsa,” I answered. “And flowers for Gina.”
Porter nodded, shifting into reverse. “Nice touch.”
