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She gives me a look. I’m pretty sure that’s something Frank told me once. It’s the kind of fact he knows. ‘Well, I will keep that in mind.’
‘I might go to Borneo actually. Frank has a friend out there. He thought I might like to go with him, have an adventure.’
‘That’s quite far,’ she mentions.
‘It is.’
And that is the end of our office chit-chat. I don’t think we’re ever destined to be more than colleagues, Jan. I nervously look at the clock. I have two minutes before they get here, before I change everything. It will all come good, as my mum would say, but I can’t help that nagging feeling of uncertainty in my gut, thinking about the debris from the bomb that’s about to detonate. I look out the doors, my attention taken by a man sobbing in the corridor on his own.
‘Ummm, Jan. Is that man alright?’ I ask, wondering if I can take him a cookie.
Jan looks up, wincing. ‘Oh, that’s Stephen from accounts. We let him go this morning, he’s one of our casualties.’ She says it so calmly. If he was some soldier dying outside, she wouldn’t care as long as he died quietly and out of sight.
I try not to let my judgement of her show in my face. He sits there staring into space, hugging a box of his belongings, tears dampening both his cheeks. Is she just going to leave him there? I get up but suddenly hear sounds from the corridor stirring and the figures of Frank, Jasper and Leo make an appearance through the glass doors. Crap. They’re here. They stand there in a line, examining the room, awaiting their fate. I pause for a moment to see Leo, rubbing the back of his head, his eyes looking down to the floor, trying to avert my gaze so the sadness of seeing me doesn’t penetrate. One of them knocks and Jan goes over to the door.
‘Please, gentlemen, please come in…take a seat,’ she says, shaking each of their hands in turn. Frank sees me and waves with both hands excitedly. Jasper gives me a beaming grin, but with Leo, there’s a look, a deep breath, a glimmer of emotion, and I almost can’t bear it. Jan comes to sit down and starts a video call with Alfred Wiseman, one of the infamous brothers who started and still own this company. I don’t know where he is but it’s certainly not in this building and he’s dressed in white, tufts of chest hair sprouting out from the top of his linen shirt. He’s possibly on a yacht or about to go on safari and hunt gazelle. He’s about to let go at least one hundred of his employees. I need to bite my tongue about the division of wealth in this corporate family, don’t I?
‘So, we are so glad to be able to have this meeting today. Maggie was the first department head actually to make her decision, and as a company that makes it much easier for us to moveforward,’ Jan starts. The men sitting opposite me look at me all cautiously.
‘That is wholly appreciated, Miss Field,’ Mr Wiseman’s gravelly voice says through the screen. I can’t help but notice the detail on that screen, the pure quality of the sound. That’s because of us, in this room. Otherwise he’d be all pixellated and there’d be a delay.
I manage a smile.
‘So Mr San, Mr Golding and Mr Westwood-Knights,’ Jan begins. ‘As you may or may not know, the company is going through a period of transition where we have had to make some important decisions involving our staff.’ I hate the scripted nature of her patter, how she’s reading it from the paperwork in front of her; she hasn’t even bothered to learn it by heart. I glance at my workmates, as they all sit there taking it in. Jasper in a bright orange knitted jumper, his hair all over the place, a resigned look to his face. Frank is for some reason in a suit, he looks incredibly smart if terrified, and keeps having to push his glasses up the bridge of his nose. And then there’s Leo, sitting there in a green shirt, looking reasonably glum, his arms folded. He doesn’t try to hold my gaze and my stomach feels waves of anxiety. I try to push down the bitter sadness that rises up in me at the thought that, just last week, we were so very intimate with each other.
‘The Wiseman Brothers was started as a…’ Jan starts reading a complex business history of the company that none of us really need to know, but from small humble beginnings – where we’re led to believe the Wiseman Brothers sharpened their own pencils and operated out of a single room the size of a cupboard – they are now a force to be reckoned with in the financial sector. ‘However, with the recession looming, it is with regret that like all other businesses, we have had to downsize to account for this, and think about the company as a whole. Before Christmas, Miss Field was informed redundancies would be made in your department, like many across the company. It is a shame but we are offering good redundancy packages with professional support if needed. You are within your rights to inform and engage any unions of which you may be members and we will also provide any legal counsel.’
Jan starts sifting through paperwork, all signed by myself, and looks at me. Jasper sits up at this point, ready to take his bullet. We’ve both agreed that he wouldn’t tell the others, so there would be no way for them to talk of him out of it or prolong discussions. His mind was made up. He was fine with it. There is such a sense of calm in his face.
It’s, therefore, such a shame I’m going to take that away.
‘Miss Maggie Field has, therefore, decided within the IT department thatshewill be taking voluntary redundancy.’
Jasper inhales sharply, leaning across the desk, an alarmed look in his face. ‘Who?’
Frank doesn’t quite know what’s going on. For the first time this morning, Leo looks up at me and straight in the eye. I feel my mouth go incredibly dry, and put my hands in my lap to stop them shaking.
‘Maggie…’ Jasper mutters. ‘No. That wasn’t even…What?’
‘It’s done,’ I say, smiling over at all of them. ‘I told Jan of my decision this morning and completed all the paperwork.’
They all sit there open-mouthed, looking at me, each of them at a loss for words.
‘The truth is, Mr Wiseman,’ I say, turning to the screen. ‘I am not a financier so I can’t admit to knowing how the numbers work, but I do know that this is a very good team. I hope our reviews and reports reflect as much. And each of these three individuals are indispensable.’ Don’t cry, Maggie. Not now. ‘I go knowing that they will carry on this good work, and I thank you for the opportunities afforded by your company.’
I look over at all of them. Jasper stands up but I urge him to return to his seat, Frank’s on the verge of tears and Leo looksdown at the desk in front of him. It’s strange how one sentence can transform a room, can have such a crushing effect. However, I don’t think the three of them feel an iota of what I do to be leaving them like this.
‘This is very true,’ Mr Wiseman says, looking over some paperwork. ‘And we appreciate your service. I very much regret losing an employee of your calibre and wish you very well for the future, Miss Field. Are you very sure you are happy with this decision?’
All of them look over at me. ‘Yes,’ I reply firmly.
It was easy really. When you looked at it properly, at all the different variations in how this team worked, the fact was the three of them needed each other, and they needed their jobs more than I needed mine. It was important they remained together, that they had each other, that our friendships could still thrive, these strange yet wonderful bonds that the four of us share. Out there, I was a London girl, I knew the bones of this city and my dad was right. Yesterday, I picked up a phone to an old university friend who had an IT consultancy job going in her office. I will adapt. And they will all cope without me. They will all be fine.
‘You’re looking at three kings of IT in front of you and I am sure they will do this company proud.’
Frank shakes his head lightly.
‘You will. And if I can give a professional recommendation, it would be that Leo Golding should be given my job as line manager moving forward.’
