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‘That’s what the duvet is for. I’ll take the bed that’s half under the desk,’ he tells me, smiling. I notice he’s arranged things so our pillows are near each other. We both settle into our beds, arranging duvets. Sandy was right, these are very comfortable mattresses. As I lie there looking up at the ceiling, a hand taps me on the forehead. Leo has rolled to his front. ‘It’s Christmas Eve,’ he tells me excitedly.
I roll onto my front too. ‘That’s why we should sleep or Santa won’t come.’ I giggle at both of us, grown adults, propped up as if we’re going to talk well into the night like we’re on a sleepover. There won’t be any shenanigans happening here tonight, that’s for sure, I don’t think the room or angles will allow for it. He reaches over and takes a lock of my hair, tucking it behind my ear.
‘I’m glad you’re here. Even if you are wearing grandma pyjamas,’ he jokes, and I shake my head at him.
‘I learned my lesson at Jasper’s. I wore a reindeer onesie andnearly got shot by hunters.’ Leo laughs. ‘I’ll save the lingerie for New Year’s.’
‘You will, will you?’ he says, grinning.
He leans over and brings his face to meet mine, kissing me gently. Long enough so I can understand the intention but short enough that it doesn’t feel inappropriate in his parents’ house. He has a hand on the back of my head, running his fingers through my hair, then rests his forehead against mine.
‘Can I say something?’ I ask him.
‘Go on.’
‘You seem different up here. More relaxed perhaps? More yourself.’
‘I guess that’s the effect of families, isn’t it?’ he replies.
‘But it’s so beautiful here. It’s obviously home to you. And London is so far away. Why did you move?’
He looks down at his hands for a moment. ‘Well, it’s the country, innit? For our industry, there’s not a lot of work here. I’d have to move to a bigger city for that. Manchester was another option but the pay’s better in London and I needed more money.’
‘How come?’
He looks hesitant to say why. ‘My Nana’s been in a home for a couple of years now and the fees stack up so I send home as much as I can to fund that.’
‘Leo…’ I say softly.
‘Gabby and Claire have their own families to worry about, I can’t have it fall on just Mum and Dad, so it makes sense.’
Emotion softens my brow to hear that he does that, for so many reasons.
‘You are amazing,’ I whisper. ‘And you peel potatoes incredibly well too. Is there anything wrong with you that I’m not aware of?’
‘I snore,’ he tells me.
‘Well, we’re all allowed one thing. I have hairy feet.’
‘That you do.’ He reaches over me to turn off a lamp, using it as a final opportunity to hover over me and give me one last kiss. ‘Go rest now, boss. Santa can hear you, you know.’
The room goes dark but I feel a hand reach out, laying itself gently in mine. I lie there for a moment and try to process it all. It’s Christmas Eve. I should be buzzing with excitement but instead feelings of confusion overwhelm me. Leo’s job funds his Nana’s retirement home fees, Jasper’s job helps him build independence for himself outside a family who see him as some sort of black sheep, Frank’s job is all he knows, the only way he can define himself as an adult. And I’m going to have to make one of them redundant. I listen to Leo slowly slipping into a light purr of a snore not knowing how I’m going to do that at all.
TWENTY-EIGHT
Christmas Day
I wake up the next morning and open my eyes to see a little person peering through the door. I recognise her as Cassie from the day before. I close my eyes again.
‘Are they naked? Are they snogging?’ an older voice says that sounds suspiciously like Nana.
‘No, they’re asleep. Uncle Leo doesn’t have a top on though,’ she reports back.
‘Knock on the door, tell them to get up. There’s no lay-ins on Christmas Day,’ Nana says. I open one eye to see Cassie nodding at the instruction. She knocks lightly and I do my very best sleepy acting, yawning loudly as the door slowly opens and I sit up on my airbed.
‘Morning. Merry Christmas, Maggie.’
I smile to see her in her Christmas best, a Christmas jumper with Scottie dogs, tartan jeggings and a matching headband. ‘Merry Christmas to you, Cassie. Is everyone up?’
