AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I sat back on the couch. I always knew Dexter to be a patient person. Our relationship was always set at my pace, like he knew I would bolt under pressure. Right now, I was sitting on the couch, fighting the urge to do so.
He came over, kneeling in front of me. “I was patient before because I knew you needed it. But now? I need an answer, Noa,” he said, his hands on my arms.
“What if I can’t do this?” My mind was scrambling, thinking of ways out.
“But what if we can? Come on, Blue. What has you so scared?”
“Daddy?”
I damn near cried with relief at the sound of Phoebe’s voice because I was so close to telling him everything. When he went to her, I headed to the bathroom, locking the door behind me. Dexter knocked on the door and I told him I’d be out in a second. I sat for a few minutes trying not to hyperventilate. When I calmed down, I flushed the toilet and looked at myself in the mirror. Blotchy skin and bags under brown eyes. I splashed some cold water on my face and dried off before walking out with a forced smile.
Dexter and Phoebe stood at the door with their coats on.
“She’s not sick,” Phoebe said with a pout.
I smiled with a little less force this time. I wasn’t an expert on kids, but it seemed like Phoebe liked me. “You don’t have to go, Dexter, really. Stay. Let’s eat. I’m famished.” I walked over to Phoebe and took her coat off.
“You’re sure?” He eyed me, and when I stood and unbuttoned his coat, he smiled softly. “Okay.”
I turned back to Phoebe, lifting her in my arms. “Your daddy is going to cook and we’re going to watch a movie!”
She shrieked in delight and when I picked up my remote, I asked her if she wanted to watch a Christmas movie. She nodded and we decided on the classics, starting withRudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Every so often, I would look back to see how dinner was faring and would catch Dexter watching us. I supposed the polite thing would be to see if he needed help, but I was enjoying my time with Phoebe.
He announced that dinner was ready in the middle ofFrosty the Snowman, so I told him we could eat in the living room. I didn’t have utensils for a child, and I could only hope Phoebe wouldn’t stab herself or anyone else.
Dinner was delicious and Phoebe was an angel. Sure, she pouted and stomped her foot when it was time to go, earning her a stern look from her father, but that was normal.
Right?
I had no clue.
Dexter ran his fingers through my hair, something I always missed, and kissed my cheek. “Tonight was wonderful. Kind of makes you think—”
“Of what could’ve been,” I finished, blinking.
“Of what can still be,” he corrected.
Always the optimist.
I shut the door behind them with a quiet moan. Maybe it was too hard to say no because I wasn’t supposed to.
I turned off my television and headed to bed. I was nearly there when I saw the white box poking from beneath it. I slid it out, running my fingers over the top.
Don’t open it, Noa. Don’t spoil a great night.
I almost did it. I almost let myself be happy. I slid the unopened box back under and crawled into bed, curling in a ball.
I didn’t cry myself to sleep that night, unlike many nights before. It was Phoebe’s pretty laugh that kept me from it.
Noa
I lookedover my latest project, a series of paintings that were close to my heart. I was reverting back to my older techniques with this one, building off the paintings I did as a teenager. Miranda loved the idea, so we worked on it. Her on the business end, me on the art end. She took down the paintings Dexter brought in, and I looked at them propped up against the walls of my studio. I turned on my phone, and it chirped almost instantly.
Dexter:What are you doing this weekend?
I loved that he knew to text me.
I hated phone calls. Rarely did I answer them, especially calls from unknown numbers.
