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Not a word is spoken between the two of us. The only sound coming out of us is heavy breathing. I kiss her again and again as my hands go to her hips and slide into her shorts. I pull them and her lace panties over her hips, and they fall to the floor, pooling around her feet. She’s standing in front of me naked as her hands go to the button of my pants. My eyes watch every single move as the sound of the zipper being pulled down echoes in the room.
I don’t think I take a breath as she moves the flaps of my jeans, and her hand slides into my boxers as she grips my cock in her hand. My mouth hovers over her as she moves her hand up and down, my hand slides down her stomach, touching her neatly trimmed triangle as my hand slips through her slit, and I slide a finger into her. She sighs out a deep breath as I slip another finger into her. She bites my lower lip before she moves to my neck, sucking in deep. My eyes close as she moves her mouth to my nipple, sucking it into her mouth before biting right next to it. I hiss out as she moves away from me and drops to her knees. I should stop this. I should move out of her touch. I should do a whole bunch of things. But I don’t do any of them.
I’m stuck, my feet stuck to the floor as if it is quicksand.
I feel her hands moving to my waist as she pushes my jeans over my hips, freeing my cock, and then sinking her mouth onto it. I open my eyes, watching her try to take me all in her mouth. My eyes lose focus on her as she bobs her head away from me before taking me to the back of her throat. I have to close my eyes, or I’ll come. My hand comes up to her head, gripping her hair in it and pulling her away from my dick before I bend and kiss her. I pull her up to stand before moving her backward to the bed. The back of her knees hit the bed, and she falls back. I kick off my boots before getting rid of my jeans as she moves back on the bed. Our eyes watch each other as I put one knee on the bed and then the other. Her legs open for me as I crawl between them. “Charlie,” she says my name.
“Shut up,” I order her, and she tilts her head back.
“I hate you,” she hisses at me. “I’ve never hated anyone as much as I hate you.”
“Good,” I snap, grabbing my cock in my hand. “The feeling is definitely mutual.” She puts her legs over mine, her hand going to my ribs as I bend to kiss her. It’s hotter than it was outside. It’s even got more wetness to it. I push her as she falls to her back, her hair fanning around her. I move my cock up and down her slit as her legs move up and over my forearms while I push them back as I slam into her. Her neck arches as her mouth opens, but nothing comes out. I give her a second to get used to the feel of me. I give myself a second to close my eyes, knowing what is coming, but it doesn’t come. I slide out of her and then slam back into her harder than the first time. Moving my arm to beside her head, I put my head beside hers. I pull out and slam back in, and she gets tighter than she was before. I thrust my hips into her with abandon. The sound of our skin slapping against each other drowns out the pants that we both heave out.
Her mouth is near my ear as she moans out, making me lift my head to look at her. Her closed eyes make me more pissed off. Why? I have no idea. “Open your fucking eyes,” I hiss at her, pulling out to the tip of my cock, making her moan as she grips my ass with her nails, scoring me. “Look at me.”
“No,” she hisses right back at me.
“Now!” I slam into her and then pull out as she slowly opens her eyes.
“There, are you fucking happy now?” She moves her hands up from my ass to my back, her nails scoring into my skin.
“No,” I whisper, “I’m not happy.” I fuck her harder than I’ve ever fucked anyone in my life. The rage of her being back in town, the rage from my life becoming a shit show. The rage from being here with her and wanting to be here is more than I can even take. I push it away and let the anger seep back in, but it doesn’t come as easy as I want it to come.
She arches her back, her hands gripping my shoulders, holding on as I put my other hand down on the bed near her head. Holding her head in my hand, I fuck her with abandon, transferring all of my hate to this moment. I feel her getting tighter and tighter around my cock, and I can’t even breathe as my hips piston in and out. Then she lets go. The moan comes out of her in a grunt as she moves her head away from me and my touch. “No fucking way,” I growl, pulling her head back to me and kissing the shit out of her. The kiss is heated as she fights back at me. The hatred in this kiss is one for the books. It’s when I feel my balls getting tighter that I let her mouth go, the sound of my heavy breathing louder than her moan as I bury my face in her neck at the same time as I bury my cock inside her and let go. My eyes close, and all I can see is Autumn. All I can see is her staring at me. I tighten my eyes even more, and still, all I can see is her. I wait to see if it changes, if Autumn is the only one I see or if it’ll be Jennifer.
I collapse on top of her as her legs fall to the bed. The hands at my shoulders fall to the side and away from me. I move to her side, sliding out of her and falling to my back, looking up at the ceiling. I place my hand on my stomach as I try to get my breathing under control. At the same time, my eyes get heavier than they have ever gotten. I close them for a second or at least that is my plan. My plan is to get up and get the fuck out of here. But here is the thing with plans—they can change on a dime. Trust me, I should know. My plan was to come here and find out when she was leaving. It was not to kiss her, it was not to fuck her, and it was not to feel what I was feeling.It is time to make another plan, and this time stick to it. That is the last thing I think before my eyes close, and then it takes so much to open them, so I just rest them.For just a second,I think to myself, and that is the last thought I have.
Chapter Ten
Autumn
The alarm makes my eyes fly open because it’s not the soft bells that I normally have. No, not this. This is a blaring, “get the fuck out of bed, the house is on fire” alarm. I feel a hardness that was plastered behind me move away and turn, then a couple of things crash to the floor. “What the fuck?” someone mumbles, and I close my eyes again, thinking this is a dream. Actually, a nightmare, when I feel the bed beside me move and then the covers shift. I hear him stumble, but I’m too afraid to actually open my eyes again. I hear movement in front of the bed where his jeans were. “Where the fuck is it?” I hear him growl as he searches the floor for it and the alarm turns off.
I lie here watching the wall, hoping he gets dressed and gets the fuck out of here without me having to look at him. “Oh my God,” he says. Then I feel him sit on the end of the bed, and I make the mistake of looking down at him. He’s sitting there with his head in his hands as he leans his elbows onto his knees. “What a clusterfuck,” he mumbles, and all I can stare at are the nail marks down his back. He shakes his head before he gets up, snatching his boxers off the floor and covering his perfect ass. It’s a shame that he’s got it all. He slides his jeans up, bending to grab his shirt. I can spot the bite mark I left next to his nipple, along with a little purple mark on his neck. He covers his perfect six-pack, and his eyes snap to mine, and he sneers at me, “Stop looking at me.”
“Nothing to look at,” I counter. “I’m waiting for you to get the fuck out so I can get up.” He bends down to put his boot on before going to the other one. “Can you do that outside?”
He looks up at me, his stare piercing my soul. “This changes nothing.” He stands up and puts his hands on his hips.
“You mean us having sex?” I pfft at him, trying to pretend that it’s okay. People have one-night stands all the time, and then they wake up and hate themselves. I think I’m doing a fine job of that, if you ask me.
“Whatever it was.” His teeth are clenched as he talks to me. “It was.”
“Nothing.” I toss the cover off me and get up. His eyes sweep my body as I lean forward, grabbing the sweater I keep at the end of the bed. “It was under nothing.” I stand by the bed, trying not to vomit everywhere. “I was drunk.” He turns his head to the side. “I hate you just as much today as I did yesterday.” I can see him bite down, his jaw getting tight. “Actually, a little more.”
“Good,” he snaps, “we’re on the same page.” He turns to walk out of the room, or maybe he’s about to storm out. I don’t fucking care at this point. He came here, and now we both have to deal with what we did.
“Just so we are on the same page,” I say, and he stops but doesn’t turn around. I look at his back as I say the words. “We had unprotected sex last night.” I can see his hands ball up beside him, his shoulders getting tight. “I better not catch anything from you.”
He whips around to look at me, anger all over his face. “And I’m supposed to believe that you’re clean?” He rolls his eyes. “Fucking please.”
“Believe it, don’t believe it,” I say. “I don’t give a shit. I just know I’m clean.” I point at myself. “You, on the other hand”—I make sure I look him up and down—“who the fuck knows.”
“Yeah, and how do you know that?” He folds his arms across his chest.
I point at him. “Because, unlike you, this was the first time I’ve had sex in eight years.” I ignore the look of shock on his face as I turn to walk to the bathroom. I don’t want to hear whatever shit he’s going to say, so I slam the door behind me. Leaning my back against it, I look down at my hands shaking as I slide to the floor. At the same time, I hear the front door open and then slam. I close my eyes and try to make the nausea pass by breathing in and out slowly.
Closing my eyes, I hope it makes the nausea go away, but instead, all I can see is Charlie over me. Yelling at me to open my eyes, his eyes looking into mine as he fucked me. I shake my head to stop the images as I get up and walk over to the shower, turning it on before taking the sweater off and seeing a reflection of myself in the mirror. I avoid even looking at myself before stepping in and washing away the smell of sex and Charlie. Two things I never thought I would say in the same sentence. I even wash my hair since he touched it. Every single inch of me washed twice, for good measure.
