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“Look, Mac, I was never crazy about you being a marshal, and you’ve never been happy with my helping the mustangs. I think the sex was just too good to walk away from without a damn good reason. I think we both need to see this as a nice interlude in our lives and wish each other well. And I do wish you well. I hope you’ll find someone else.”
“Willa…”
“We want different things from a relationship. You want to be in charge, and I’ve never been comfortable with that.”
“Bullshit, Willa. We both know you were always happiest when you didn’t have to be in control. You’ve had to do for yourself all of your life. You learned to let me carry some of your burdens, and more than that, you liked it.”
“Your delusional.”
“And you’re throwing a tantrum because I won’t let you have your way.”
He reached for her, and she backed away.
“Please, Mac. This isn’t easy for me. If you ever loved me, please be gone before I return. Like I said, I can have all of your things packed and sent to you.”
“Willa, I don’t want you out in the wilderness by yourself. I can pack a weekend bag and be out of here in a few minutes.”
“I’m fine on my own. Except for the time I’ve been with you, I’ve been on my own most of my life. And what you want ceased to have any importance in my life when you decided to leave.”
She started to walk away, but he grabbed her by the upper arm and spun her into his body, his mouth descending on hers. She surprised herself by clinging to him and kissing him with a desperation born of pain and loss. He kissed her until she was breathless, then nuzzled and kissed her all down her neck on one side and up the other until he was plunging his tongue deep within her mouth to taste and tease. When he’d kissed her past comprehension, she found the strength to gently push him away.
“I’ll be fine. I won’t go far, but I can’t watch you leave. Please be careful out there, Mac. I know it’s too late and way too little, but I think I always loved you.”
She turned and fled, leaving him to stand and watch her go. She had Gator saddled in record time and only took a bedroll and small emergency pack strapped to her saddle, then checked her rifle, then put it in the scabbard, led the big horse out of the barn, and swung up onto him. Loping away, she hoped Mac would never know how much she hurt.
Chapter
Four
Five lonely years had passed since Mac had walked out of her life. Sometimes, she almost felt like she could breathe again, but then something would remind her of him, or she’d have a dream in which either he didn’t go, or he returned to her. Waking from those dreams to find herself alone was gut-wrenching.
Willa moved Gator toward the mustangs that were her quarry. She needed to get them to the small canyon hidden behind the waterfall, the one she had used many times, taking advantage of the easily blockaded entrance and ample food and water. The men who she had liberated this herd from would be in hot pursuit as soon as they changed a tire on each of their vehicles. Willa was a good shot, and disabling their vehicles was the most effective way to delay their reaction to her theft. The rustlers—at least that was how Mac had always referred to them—might take up the chase, but their cursory search wouldn’t last long.
Mac—the thought of him still had the power to wound. Willa wondered if she’d ever truly heal from that loss. She shook her head to clear it. The rustlers would move on to easier and unguarded prey. She didn’t have another expedition booked fora couple of weeks. That would give her plenty of time to lie low with the horses until the men moved on. After that, she could easily drive them to protected lands.
She urged the wild horses on, using Gator’s intimidating size to push the stallion, his mares, and foals toward the entrance of the hidden canyon. They were reluctant to follow the trail along the bottom of the cliff, but she relentlessly moved them forward. Once past the waterfall, a tunnel opened up, and the stallion led his mares into the secluded valley.
Willa followed them in, then stepped off Gator and put the gate in place that would block the only exit out of the lush meadow nestled in the ring of steep, sharp cliffs. She set up the makeshift corral under one of the big trees and pulled Gator’s tack, so he could munch grass and relax for a few hours.
In the five years they’d been apart, Mac’s standing within the agency had only improved. He threw himself into the job in order not to have to think about Willa. The mandate of his team was to be available to assist other marshals on an immediate basis or launch a fugitive retrieval action for those listed on the service’s Most Wanted list.
Though he loved his job, his team was stable, and the past few weeks had been relatively quiet, more and more Mac found his thoughts dwelling on what might have been with Willa. Having her walk away had gutted him. He had never found another woman who could compare to her. More than one friend had tried to set him up. In fact, everyone in his life seemed to think he needed to settle down. Everyone, that was, except John. His old friend knew Mac had lost his heart to Willa and neversaid a word, except when both had had too much to drink, then he’d encourage Mac to go back and take what was his.
“For Christ’s sake, Mac, she isn’t doing any better than you. The two of you belong together.”
“What do you think I should do? Buy her a ring, take her over my knee, and spank her until she agrees to marry me, then fuck her silly?
“Why not?” John said, grinning. “It worked for me.”
Mac had laughed, recalling that John had convinced Mandy to build a life together just that way.
Now, as settled as he was going to get without her, he allowed his mind to wander to what they’d had and how easily they had both let it slip away. It was late one night when he’d been nursing a Kentucky whiskey, he had decided compounding initial pride and stupidity with continuing pride and stupidity was just, well… stupid. With a clarity only a good sour mash could give a man, Mac decided he was done being proud and stupid—he was going to get Willa back. She was and had always been, the only woman he ever loved. He needed to get her back, put their lives back on track, and build the life they always should have had… together. Mac had never found with anyone else what he’d had with her, and he knew from John, Willa had been similarly alone.
There had been rumors about a change in location for his team. He had the seniority and success that would allow him to write his own ticket about where they went, assuming he even stayed with the Marshals. He often wondered if his time in public service wasn’t coming to an end. He’d realized, recently, how much he missed riding every day. Most of his youth had been spent on the middle of a horse’s back. He missed having a life that was about more than hunting down bad guys and didn’t involve a lot of bullshit bureaucracy. He wanted to be out on the open range again, but most importantly, he wanted Willa.
When his phone rang, the hairs on the back of his neck stood up, and he had the oddest foreboding something was about to change. Glancing down at his cell, he recognized John’s number. He’d taken Mac’s post on the Fugitive Retrieval Task Force out of Arizona when Mac left to head up the SOG.
“Mac? It’s John. I was hoping to be able to catch you tonight. You and your guys ready to roll?”
