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Croft smiled, knowing she was making small talk to cover her nervousness. She had plenty to be nervous about. His hope she was more focused on just how hard he was going to punish her than she was on Reid’s disappearance or what he would find tomorrow. He wished he could offer her some kind of reassurance about her brother, but he wasn’t going to lie to her. All he could do was let her know, whatever happened, she wouldn’t face it alone. He was hopeful her concern about being put back over his knee would help her make better choices in the future.
“As you know, I come from an old and distinguished naval family. I was the first to become a SEAL. I saw way too much—too many things that could have been avoided or done better to preserve the lives of innocents. I lost faith those who were giving the orders gave a damn about what was right, moral, or honorable. When I finished my last tour, I was done. I wanted out and needed a place to go. I got on my motorcycle and headed west. When I looked over the rim of the Grand Canyon for the first time, I felt my soul start to heal and decided I didn’t want to leave. I’d always been good with animals, and the Rocking Rwas willing to take a chance on me. I traded in my motorcycle for a good horse and a good rig, started cowboying for them, got involved in rodeoing on the side, and never looked back. I needed something simple, something real, something I could hold on to in the middle of the night.”
“And now I’ve reopened those old wounds,” she said sadly.
“On the contrary. You reminded me why I became a SEAL in the first place. Mac and John did that a couple of years ago when I helped them with the apprehension of Simon Eastwick. It felt good to be part of something for the greater good. So, when Mac left the Marshals to found Wild Mustang, he persuaded John to leave as well. I was their first hire. Now, when I find myself under fire or going into hostile situations, I know I’m on the side of the angels. As I said, babe, this isn’t our, or even my first K&R operation.”
“I should have trusted you.”
“There was no way for you to know that. A bunch of scumbags beat your brother up and said they’ll kill him if you didn’t do exactly what they told you to do. So, you do it. Foolish? Perhaps, but also courageous, loyal, and loving. Not the worst three traits I could have in my woman. They help to offset the foolish part, which I mean to teach you not to give in to.”
“I’m not your woman,” she said softly.
He chuckled. “Yes, you are, and we both know it. I’ve been thinking with everything that’s going to happen tomorrow and all the things that could go wrong, I might be willing to postpone the spanking you’ve got coming until we’re both back up on the rim and know what’s what.”
“I suppose you expect me to thank you for that?”
“I do indeed. I want you to make note I said postpone, not forego.”
“You can’t just waltz into my life and take over.”
“Not only can I, I’m pretty damn sure I already did,” he said, laughing at her. “Give it up, Finn. We both know you’re mine… and that I’m yours. I make a really good living working for Mac…”
“I don’t need you to support me.”
“I didn’t say you did, but I also know you come from a shitload of old money. Your family makes mine look like paupers. My point was, I don’t need your money. I have an excellent pension from the Navy, live pretty minimally, so haven’t spent a lot, and get paid well for what I do. I figure if we combine that with what I guess you make as a renowned photojournalist, we can build a good life together. We’re going to have to talk about some of the places you stick your nose into…”
“It’s my job.”
“And you’re at a point you can pick and choose what assignments you take. I’m not telling you to take pictures of sunshine and rainbows—that’s not who you are—but going behind the lines in Fallujah and into some of those remote places where they really hate women and in particular, uppity American ones like you, is something we’ll have to negotiate about on a case-by-case basis.”
“I suppose we’ll do all the negotiating while you beat my ass?” she said, trying hard not to laugh.
“Depends on whether you’re willing to be reasonable, but lie to me, go behind my back, do something as stupid as this, or flat-out disobey me, and you can expect to find yourself facedown again, getting your fanny turned bright red.”
“You expect me to agree to that?”
Croft laughed again. “Baby, did you miss the part where you already did?”
“It’s not funny.”
“It is. Not forty-eight hours ago, I thought you were a major pain in the ass and couldn’t wait to get rid of you. Now, I can’timagine how I lived this long without you or what I would do if I ever lost you.”
“I don’t get you. One minute, you’re this macho, over-the-top alpha male, and the next, you’re this sensitive guy who’s as in touch with his feelings and more willing to express them than anyone I’ve ever known.”
He grinned at her. “I know, babe. I’m complicated.”
She laughed and looked as though some of the tension had left her body.
“Why don’t we get Jasper and Sam and take them and our dishes down to the river.” He stood. “You can hold the boys while I clean up or vice versa.”
“My choices are wash dishes or hold mules? I’m holding the mules.”
“Fair enough,” he said, helping her to her feet.
They gathered their things and headed down to the river. Both mules had impeccable manners, and he had no concerns turning them both over to her while he washed their things. He grinned. It seemed Jasper had become fond of Finn and was as interested in interacting with her as he was in getting a drink. Once Sam realized he was missing out on her attention, he began to demand his fair share.
Croft leaned back against a rock by the bank and enjoyed just watching her in the moonlight. She looked up to see him smiling at her.
