AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“What if you’d died?” he says through clenched teeth.
“I didn’t die.”
“What if I hadn’t been there and he’d—” he cuts himself off and I’m not sure either of us has realized that he walked me backward until we’re out of space when my back hits the wall. He searches my face as if needing to prove that it’s real. I’m real.
“I’m here, Zeke. I’m alive. I’m here,” I say, my hands over the backs of his.
He bends his head, his forehead coming to mine. He closes his eyes. “I couldn’t live without you. I can’t… Live without you.”
My heartbeats are thuds, the only sound that of blood pounding my ears. His pain is so raw. So visceral. I remember what I’d said to him, that all those emotions inside him are drowning him.
“Zeke.” I touch his face, tears toppling over my lashes.
He opens his eyes again and I tilt my head back to look up at him.
“I told you I can’t make love…” he starts, then trails off.
I shake my head, caress his face, reach up on tiptoe to kiss his mouth. “You’re wrong. You’re so wrong, you dummy.”
His eyes mist over softening that steely gray making them even more depthless. “What have you done to me, Blue?”
I smile through my tears, wipe my nose with the back of my hand before kissing him fully on the mouth. “I loved you, Zeke. I love you.”
29
BLUE
Zeke spends that night in the hospital with me. We lie together in that too small bed and hold each other, and we both sleep a little, I think. Every time I open my eyes, though, his are open and he’s watching me.
I’m released from the hospital the next day and Zeke and I drive to the Bishop house. I’m not sure what’s coming next and I’m not sure he is either. I get the feeling he’s processing what he’s done, what he said. In a way, it’s amusing to watch him like this. This self-assured man, the strongest man I know, uncertain, unsure what to do.
My sister is doing well and so is Rudy. They are swimming every day which Wren loves. Rudy is surprised at her skill in the water and I’m not sure if I should have hope or not, but I do because this is something of the old Wren. Her trauma is still in her somewhere. I see it in her eyes sometimes, like when she first saw Zeke, I saw that moment of hesitation, almost as if memory were warning her of danger because to her, I think most men equal danger. Is it possible to come back from where she is? Not fully, I know that, but I’ll take what I can get. All I know for certain is I’m going to do my best for her and now that we’re no longer running, no longer hiding, I can.
I’m not sure what state I expect the house to be in but when we walk in, I find it’s in perfect condition, everything picked up, anything that had been broken removed, furniture put back in place, debris cleaned up.
“Do you want to eat something?” Zeke asks as I peer into the study.
I shake my head. “I really want a shower first.”
He nods and we walk upstairs together. I let him lead me to his room where he switches on the shower and as it heats up, he strips off my clothes and his. He’s still wearing what he’d had on at the guest house and mine are clothes the hospital gave me.
He looks me over, taking in various bruises, some healing, some newer. I look him over too. He didn’t get by unscathed. No one could.
“We’re a sight, huh?” I ask, both of us a little awkward after yesterday.
He smiles, takes my hand and walks me into the shower where he begins to wash me.
“I think they loved each other,” I say, taking some body wash into my hands and rubbing it over his shoulders.
He raises his eyebrows.
“Girard and Ines.”
“I think they’re both a little mad. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t think we’ll see them again.”
“What about the files?” I ask, remembering.
“He destroyed everything pertaining to my brother and I.”
