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She waved him off before glancing back toward me. “How is it really? The whole daycare back to work? On the one hand, I couldn’t wait. On the other, it was stressful.”
“That’s exactly how I feel. I’m so grateful you recommended the daycare. Teddy seems comfortable there. He was a little fussy the first day or two, but he’s adjusted quickly.”
“Good. I knew it would be okay. Do you want to grab some coffee, maybe midday today?” she asked.
I was about to shake my head when she tipped her head to the side. “You’re allowed to have breaks. I know from Rhys that you worked way more than expected when you were his assistant. Plus, you’re still doing two jobs.”
“Rhys hired a new assistant,” I pointed out.
“Yeah, and you’re onboarding that person and making sure everything goes as smoothly as possible. That’s a job. Take a half an hour for coffee with me,” she pressed.
A laugh rustled in my throat. “I will.”
“I’ll come get you here.”
She waved as she left my office. I opened my laptop to a wall of emails. About a half an hour before I was going to meet Phoebe, I went to take care of my pumping for the day. Pumping my breast milk was decidedly not fun for me. After I put the breast milk in my small office refrigerator, Phoebe and I headed out for coffee.
As she was driving, I asked, “How long did you breastfeed?”
“Are you having mom guilt?” she asked wryly.
“Yes!”
“I feel you. I managed to stick with breastfeeding for nine months and that was it.”
“I hate pumping. I am beyond grateful that I have my own office and I can do it privately.”
“Well, I haven’t talked to anybody that enjoyed pumping,” Phoebe said.
I laughed.
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned about being a mother, you’re going to have about five million reasons to feel guilty about all kinds of things and you’re constantly going to second-guess yourself and wonder if you’re doing it wrong. You’re also probably going to assume everyone else is doing it better or whatever. With all of that, try to cut yourself some slack. If you hate breastfeeding, stop. The world is filled with perfectly healthy babies who didn’t breastfeed. Don’t feel guilty. If we need to do an intervention on the mom guilt, we will.”
Tears sprung to my eyes. I hadn’t realized how good it felt to have friends who had my back. “Thank you. I’m not planning to stop breastfeeding just yet, but I’m thinking about it. Meanwhile, I’m trying not to feel like shit for actually enjoying going to work.” Impulsively, I reached over and squeezed her shoulder, wanting to give her a hug. “Thank you for being so nice to me. I feel like I got a ready-made support circle when I moved here.”
Phoebe slowed to turn into the parking lot at Firehouse Café. “You don’t need to thank me. You’re a good friend. What comes around goes around.”
When we walked into the café a few moments later, my eyes landed on Griffin. He was at the back of the line, talking to another firefighter I’d met in passing. As soon as Griffin’s eyes snagged mine, my belly did a little shimmy, and sparks spun like pinwheels through me.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Griffin
“Oh, hey there, Griffin and—” Phoebe paused, her voice slowing. “I can’t remember your name.”
Hudson, one of the newer firefighters, cracked a quick smile. “Hudson Fox.”
“That’s it! I’d know your name if I was still firefighting full-time,” Phoebe replied. She gestured from us to Tish. “Griffin, you know Tish, but Hudson, this is Tish, a good friend of mine and sort of new to town. She is now running the show for the offices here at Fireweed Industries.”
Hudson dipped his head. “Nice to meet you, Tish.”
I wanted to kiss Tish, right this very second. Her cheeks were pink, and I could tell from the uncertainty in her eyes that she wasn’t sure how to greet me. This was a conversation we hadn’t had. Maybe she was okay with us being public, but I didn’t know.
Her lips curled in a smile as she glanced toward Hudson. “Nice to meet you.”
Her eyes bounced to mine and away again, the flush deepening on her cheeks. She fiddled with the strap on her purse. Phoebe was saying something to Hudson, so I stepped closer to Tish. “How’s your day going?” I kept my voice low.
She peered up quickly. “Good. Yours?”
