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“Emer. She says Sheena stole her baby out of the cot, put her own child there in his place, and then she put Emer’s child out in the cold to die,” Bradach replied, dropping my jaw. “They were able to save the baby in time, but Emer’s calling for blood.”
“Oh, Meya.” My stomach churned thinking of that poor child stolen and left to die. “Why would this Sheena do such a thing?”
“Cuckoo birds,” Bradach replied. “It’s what they do. Throw all the other eggs out of a nest, lay their own, and leave the borrowed mother to raise their offspring. Sheena wasn’t in her right mind when she did it.” He shook his head. “But that’s little comfort to Emer.”
“The change has taken her.” Alisdair’s deep baritone floated to my ears. “Her faemanity has so eroded, she abandoned one child and tried to kill another. As my people become more and more animal-like, the laws of fae are discarded for the law of beasts, and in the wild, the only thing an animal fears is predators.”
The litter stopped. I peered from the blankets into Alisdair’s shadowed eyes.
“I am the law, Ana, becausethey fear me. They don’t want to be an animal. They don’t want to give in to their instincts,because then they become my prey. As long as that is true, there is peace in Lumenfell, and when it isn’t true... there is death.”
I slowly sat up, holding his gaze. “Alisdair, I’m not saying this woman doesn’t deserve punishment. I say she doesn’t deserve death. Bradach said himself that she wasn’t in her right mind. She didn’t know what she was doing.”
“But that’s the point, my lady.” Bradach moved to Alisdair’s side. “She will never be in her right mind again. This isn’t like your sickness. I can’t shock her system and bring her back. Once the change takes you completely, your true self is gone. From this point on, every time she gives birth, she will abandon that child and kill another in the process. You have to know that can’t be allowed to happen.”
My throat was so tight, I choked swallowing. “Y-yes. Of course I know that, but it doesn’t have to be done this way. We could take them somewhere. Away. Where they can’t hurt each other or anyone else.”
“Prison,” Alisdair dropped bluntly. “Sheena was once a singer. Had the most beautiful voice in the five kingdoms, and dreamed of proving it—singing far and wide through Elva and beyond. Now she’s a feathery madwoman who shits herself and tries to kill infants.”
I flinched.
“So you tell me what she would want— No,” Alisdair said, bearing down on me. “Tell me what you’d want. To die as your true self, or to live out the rest of your days as an animal trapped in a cage?”
I dropped my gaze, fists shaking. Alisdair didn’t know the true question he was asking me. What would I want if it was me, because it was me. Would I rather live the rest of my life an angry, bitter, cruel, resentful princess with no love, no family, and no hope? This body was my own prison, and would someone not be doing me a kindness if they sent me to the Meadows ofMeya while I was still me, instead of letting Emiana kill me all on her own?
“Okay,” I said softly—evenly. “I understand why you do this. I even see why you believe it a kindness. The person Sheena was is gone. You want to protect the memory of the beautiful singer, instead of the infamy of the baby-killing fae-beast.”
My eyes narrowed. “But you need to hear this, Alisdair, and heed me well. You didn’t trade a bird off Salman. You married me. A woman with her own mind and opinions. I will challenge you, argue with you, and bite you when necessary. If you have a problem with that, too bad. I’m not going to change, so take me as I am, or leave me.”
Hear that, Emiana. You will not take me.
Alisdair rocked back, observing me. What he was thinking, I couldn’t begin to guess. His expression gave nothing away.
“Hmm. Very well,” he replied. “I’ll take you.” Alisdair shrugged, a smirk overtaking him. “And, to be fair, I did bite you first. But you liked it when I did that.”
My skin flushed hot and sudden as the tightening in my lower belly.Of course he would bring that up in the middle of an argument while we have an audience!
“Would you like me to carry you the rest of the way?” he asked, shocking me. “I’ve found I like having your rump on my shoulder and within easy smacking distance.”
“Away with you, you beast!” I shrieked, lobbing a pillow at him.
Alisdair snagged my wrist and spun me, tossing me over his shoulder laughing.
If I laughed too, it was smothered by his cloak, so he couldn’t prove it.
That night, I lay next to him in bed, watching him sleep.
The beast couldn’t be held back in a dream. Every terrifying inch of him towered beside me. The claws, the fangs, the fur, themuzzle, and mishmash of every predator in creation thrown into one. All of the others were turning into animals while Alisdair turned into a monster.
“But you’re not one...”
All those weeks ago, Aeris shamed me for thinking I could get a man I didn’t even know to fall in love with me. Now I saw how right she was.
All the world saw of the man they dubbed Shadowsoul, was a fearsome, unrepentant king sitting back on his throne while the curse he created ripped through all of Elva—destroying our land and the fae living on it.
I’d never know the truth of how the curse began, and he’d never be able to tell me, but I understood now, that Alisdair wasn’t uncaring of the devastation he caused. He ruled a kingdom of beasts with a clawed iron fist to maintain order in chaos. He put down anyone who became a threat to the peaceful, happy people dancing in the square while their children giggled and skated on the frozen fountain.
And then, after he was done being an incorrigible ass, he sat down with me in private and listened to my ideas for how we could care for the people who were taken by the madness of the curse. He didn’t agree with me, and we arguedloudly, but he did listen, and by the end, he agreed to let me decide which cases were hopeless, and which we would relocate to somewhere private, enclosed, and safe where they couldn’t harm any else.
