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“Well…” She winced in apology before answering, “If you were seeing her in the in-between, maybe she’s not…in-between anymore.”
I froze, not even wanting to entertain her suggestion. “You mean, you think she just…?” I couldn’t even finish the sentence. “Like the grief from learning about her sister just?—?”
Across the room, Oaklynn’s phone began to ring.
We all glanced at her, and she grimaced in apology as she fumbled to check the screen. “It’s just Jay,” she said, waving a hand and shoving her phone back into her pocket. “I’ll call her back later.”
But I shook my head. Jaylani was also friends with Raina. What if the call was about Raina? “No. Answer it. Please,” I begged.
She nodded, giving me a funny look but pulling the phone free again.
Accepting the call, she pressed it to her ear and had to clear her throat before saying, “Hey, hon.”
A second later, her gaze shot to me, and she gasped before covering her mouth with her hand. “Oh God. Oh my God.”
I shook my head to deny it, even as tears sprang to Oaklynn’s eyes. “Okay.” She nodded. “Okay, yeah. We’ll be right there.”
When she hung up, she shuddered out a breath and turned to Damien. He took her hand in support, and then she glanced at me. “It was about Raina. Jay’s at the hospital, visiting, and—and…” Shaking her head, she sobbed before more tears gushed down her cheeks. “Raina just—she went into sudden cardiac arrest.”
“She’s dead,” I said flatly, while everything inside seemed to spin wildly.
“She flatlined,” Oaklynn affirmed, her voice shaking terribly. “They’re trying to resuscitate her right now.” Turning back to Damien, she clutched the front of his shirt. “I told Jay I’d go down there to be with her.”
He nodded and pulled her into a hug, while Keene backed toward the exit of the kitchen slowly. “I just killed her, didn’t I? She found out her sister was dead, and she couldn’t take the shock.”
“Keene, no.” Alec stepped toward him, but Keene shook his head and whirled away to race off. So Alec hurried after him.
“I’m going to the hospital too,” I said as both Damien and Oaklynn left the kitchen to change.
I felt strangely numb, as if my body knew something big and traumatic had just happened, so it had shut down most of the major sensory perceptions as it transferred over to survival mode.
“Want us to come with you?” Hudson asked.
Glancing at him, I shook my head. “No. I—I’m fine.” Ishouldbe fine, anyway. I mean… “I barely even knew her, and that probably wasn’t the real her, anyway. Just a part of her spirit.”
He furrowed his brows in confusion. “What the fuck does that matter?”
I wasn’t sure. It really didn’t seem to matter at the moment. I still felt lost. But rationally, I thought itshouldmake a difference.
So I said, “I got this.” I kind of wanted to deal with it alone, anyway. I’d been the only one to see her; so I almost didn’t want to include anyone else in my grief.
He nodded as if understanding, and Faith hurried over, surprising me with a hug. “I’m so sorry, Foster,” she said.
I shook my head, even as I hugged her back. “I’m fine,” I said. “It’s okay. I’m not…”
But I didn’t know what I was or wasn’t, so I gritted my teeth and tightened my arms around her in gratitude before choking out, “Thank you.”
Because any kind of comforting hug was always appreciated.
14
THE BEACH
Sand. It was under my fingers, behind my legs, squishing around the heels of my feet. I was lying supine on a whole lot of sand.
The sun was blaring brightly this time. I found it hard to open my eyes. Lifting my hand to provide myself with some shade, I squinted my eyes open and glanced around the beach. The waves were flowing in and out steadily, seagulls were calling above me, and heat mixed with the slight chill in the breeze coated my flesh with a pleasant caress.
Groggy, I sat up with a groan, expecting to find more people this morning than I had the other night. But it was just me again.
