AllFreeNovel
Share Us
PROLOGUE
FOSTER
March 2014
“So how have your meetings been going?” Mom asked as she reversed our family car down the driveway.
I gave a distracted, “Fine,” from the passenger seat before I twisted around to check on my siblings in the back.
One of Breydan’s chubby bare feet greeted me immediately as it kicked above her backward-facing carrier. Next to her, four-year-old Reed sat in the middle on his booster as he lifted himself higher to look out the front window, and I could hear Amy directly behind me, humming the birthday tune under her breath.
All were present and accounted for.
Exhaling in relief, I turned to face forward again just as Mom reached the street and geared the car into drive.
“Well, you haven’t had an episode since you started attending them,” she said. “Do you think the group’s been helping?”
With a shrug, I mumbled, “I guess.”
I prayed she would buy that answer, anyway, because no way did I want her to know I’d merely learned how to hold everything in until I was locked alone somewhere where no one could see me flip out.
It was important to her that I stop having panic attacks, and I wasn’t about to let her down. I had to be perfect and do everything right. We weren’t losing anyone else because of me. Not ever again.
“You’ve talked about that day, then?” she pressed as she stopped at a light. I shuddered with dread, and cold sweat trailed down my back. “You’ve opened up?—”
“Mama?” Amy’s voice broke in. “How long is Foster gonna be gone in his meetin’ today?”
She was impatient for me to get through today’s session. Mom had promised her we’d eat lunch at Dairy Queen as soon as I was done.
“Sweetie, I’m talking to Foster right now, but his meeting will only take ninety minutes. That’s an hour and a half. We can wait an hour and a half, no problem. Besides, it’d be too early for lunch right now, anyway.”
“Snack, snack,” Breydan babbled, hearing the mention of food.
“But what’re we going to do for a whole hour and a half?” Amy whined.
“I thought we’d go to the park,” Mom answered as she reached behind her seat.“Doesn’t that sound fun?”
Still driving with her other hand, she pulled up an oversized bag and tugged a plastic container full of cereal from it. Then, handing it into the back, she said, “Reed, sweetie, can you give Breydan some of these? One at a time, and yes, you can have a few too. Just… Don’t eat all of them yourself.”
“Which park?” Amy demanded. “The one with the big slide?”
“That one’s too far away, hon. We’re just going to go to the one right around the corner from?—”
Reed pulled the lid off the cereal container with enough gusto to send Cheerios flying everywhere.
“Sakes alive,” Mom cried while Amy screamed at Reed for getting cereal in her hair, and a panicked Breydan started calling, “Snack, snack,” even louder as if she sensed she wasn’t going to get anything to eat.
Reed’s bottom lip quivered before he burst into tears, wailing, “I didn’t mean to.”
“Foster, could you…?” Mom begged with helpless desperation.
“Got it,” I assured as I clicked off my seat belt and crawled halfway into the back to snag the cereal container from Reed’s hand. I fed two Cheerios to Breydan, which seemed to pacify her for the time being, and I quickly picked pieces from Amy’s hair before feeding them to Reed, who thought this was hilarious.
After giving Amy a fresh handful of cereal from the container so she could eat too, I fed Breydan two more pieces and shimmied my way back into the front passenger seat with the cereal in my possession.
“Thank you,” Mom breathed in relief as I tossed piece after piece into the backseat for my three little siblings to catch and eat. “I should’ve just given the container to you in the first place.”
“Tee,” Breydan chirped cheerfully from her seat as we stopped at a stop sign. “Tee.” I glanced back to see her finger pointing out the window of the car. “Fo-Fo, wook. A tee!”
