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“I’m not even certain what’s got me so upset,” I confess.
“Let me wash you.” Fee releases my hands and picks up the honey-lavender-scented body wash that came with the rental. She squirts some out and begins to massage it into my shoulders. Back. Arms. Butt. Moving around my body, she lathers up my chest. Stomach. Upper legs.
She sits on the bench and pulls me toward her. My cock stiffly juts out against her cheek.
I grip her face and guide her mouth against the underside of my shaft. Her tongue darts out and licks my pulsing vein. Fee presses her palms against my inner thighs to spread my stance, giving her extra room. As she licks and suckles, she soaps up my balls, taint, and ass before focusing back on my cock.
“Give me the wand.” Fee’s blue eyes gaze up at me and she holds out her hand. I give her the skinny apparatus and turn on the water. She lovingly rinses off my bits, massaging and caressing.
I massage her scalp with the tips of my fingers as she cleans me. Marveling in how uninhibited she is in this moment. Sitting on the bench with her legs on either side of mine. Her curvy body on full, glorious display, Fee’s not trying to hide herself. Her only focus is giving me pleasure.
I kneel, but she protests, “No, Zane. I’m taking care of you today.”
Fiona guides my cock back in her mouth and cups my balls with her free hand, slipping her finger back and forth along my gooch as she plays. All of the sensations are so intense, within seconds I can’t help but shout when I explode down her throat. I’m slumped over her, my hands grip her shoulders for support as she sucks me dry.
When I manage to pull myself together, I sit on the bench and watch as she washes herself. Soaps up her body. Shampoos her hair. Her eyes never leave mine. “You’re so fucking hot.” I reach up and tap her nipple.
“I am.” She rinses herself. “And I’m all yours. Forever.”
“Thank God.” I stand and kiss her sweet, sassy mouth, which tastes of me.
Fee hands me a towel when we finish our shower. “You know, for all of the therapy you’ve done over the years, you’re forgetting it’s okay to take care of yourself. We’ve spent weeks dissecting so much shit from Ty’s abuse to Carter’s history to my own B.S. with my mom. It’s time for some of this to be about you. You don’t always have to put on a happy face, baby. Getting your own needs met is part of our family’s healing.”
I think about this as we dry off.
Remember that I, too, am a work in progress.
We all are. It’s not like my life is going to be magically fixed when we leave Arizona. Not with my folks. Not with the band. Not even with Fee.
What’s comforting, though?
Maybe, just maybe, this is the beginning of something better than I could have ever dreamed of.
Chapter twenty-seven
FIONA
A Month Later
TosayI’mnotlooking forward to tomorrow is an understatement.
It will be the first time we see Ty and Zoey—and Carter and Lianne—since Zane and I took Mia out of camp and left Arizona a week early.
Our last family therapy session turned into, well, quite a blowout. Zane got in Carter’s face. Ty defended Carter, so Zane said some hurtful things. Zoey defended Ty. I got in her face and defended Zane. Lianne tried to play peacemaker, but Ty—with good reason—got upset about Zoey and the baby’s health.
I tried to apologize, but we all decided it was best for us to go home.
The six of us are due for a follow-up session when Ty and Zoey get back to Seattle, which I’m equally looking forward to and dreading. The guys have said their worst. Now we can pick up the pieces.
Hopefully.
Before any of this happened, Zane and I offered to use our house as a gathering place for Ty’s big apology. With tension unresolved as of yet, it’s going to be super uncomfortable, but I’m a woman of my word. Tomorrow, the entire LTZ family will come by in the afternoon. The chips will fall where they may.
A couple days after Zane and I got home, I decided to rip the bandage off and confront my mom. As much as she’s hurt me, she’s my mother. I offered to give our relationship one final chance before I throw in the towel. She agreed to work with me and my therapist to try to establish new boundaries.
We’ve been to a few sessions. For now, she seems committed. She’s apologized to me. To Zane. Claims to want to fix things. Hesitantly, I’ve agreed to let Mia spend two hours with her tomorrow afternoon during the meeting with Ty, however, I’m sending Olga too. I trust our nanny implicitly. She’ll know if and when she needs to get Mia out of there.
The doorbell rings. Mia bounds down the stairs. “The twins are here!”
