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His mouth brushed against my hair as he whispered, “You are worth every risk, Rin. Every damned one.”
I sobbed into his shirt, soaking it. He held me, whispering to me for what felt like hours, yet only minutes had passed. I pulled back, the salty tears continued to fall. Seth titled his nose, bringing his face closer, his eyes searched mine. I subtly nodded and closed the gap. Our lips clashed, meshing together. Soft and wet as they moved as an extension of one another, slowly.
The tears fell faster, the ache in my chest grew, clenching, afraid to let go. I gripped the front of Seth’s drenched shirt and pulled him closer. His hand splayed on my back, his fingertips kneading my shirt as if fighting the urge to yank it off, to rip it. A moan escaped my lips; Seth growled in response. I leaned into him, pushing him onto his back. I nestled my legs on either side of his hips, straddling him. We both panted, our kiss deepening. Seth hooked his thumbs in the waistband of my pants, bringing my hips down closer to his. My hands ran down the length of his torso, reaching the hem of his shirt. I began tugging it upward, wanting, needing to run my fingers along his sculpted body. He grabbed my wrists, stopping me. I whimpered as he slowed our heated kiss and pulled back, one hand moving to cup my face.
No, please.
His eyes were clouded, emotion swirling within them as he gazed in mine. “Rin.”
I placed my hand over his. Letting the question linger.
“Not like this. Not when you’ve been emotionally drained,” he moved my hand, placing it on his heart. “When we do this, I want it to be right. Perfect.” Every word vibrated my hand,shivers snaking up my arm, warmth filling the cracks within me. Bit by bit.
I need you.
My lip wobbled and he wiped the tears from my cheek. “Why?” I whispered, fear gripping me.
“Because Erin. You are far more important to me than you know.” He moved my hand to his mouth, placing a kiss across each of my fingertips.
And you are far too important to me.
A final tear escaped and I blinked, taking in Seth’s beautiful face. A small, hushed voice whispered in the far corner of my heart.
Mine.
Chapter forty-one
Erin
The following week and a half flew by, with no repetition of the night that I broke down. Seth and I moved a comfortable distance around each, almost falling into a routine. We’d wake up at the crack of dawn, Josh already at his front door. I’d grab a few waters and protein bars for myself and Seth then we’d head to the field behind his house and train until noon. They had me rotate between my daggers and sword, as I now wore all three on my person at Seth’s insistence. I’d emailed my professors and had my classes switched to online strictly and after spinning some tale for Ashlin, which still hadn’t sat well with me, I was down to a single four-hour shift per week.
Unfortunately, that left my wallet suffering and my feeling like a burden to be in full swing, even though Seth more than assured me that it wasn’t an issue. I broke my lease at my apartment, seeing as I wouldn’t be going back for the foreseeable future. Financially, it made no sense to continue to pay the rent with me no longer dwelling there. So, two days ago, we loaded up the remainder of my belongings and shoved everything besidesthe rest of my clothes into a cheap storage unit, much to Seth’s dismay. I’d told him to suck it up and he’d mumbled something about his house being open to me and my things, I only half listened, preoccupied with exhaustion.
In an attempt to make up and keep my being a burden to a minimum, I’d taken it upon myself to beat Seth to the punch on all things cooking and house related. He fought me on it, daily. Racing to re-rack and clean up the workout area before I could, same with his living room and the kitchen. I caved on him helping me cook, due to Libby and Derik popping in and out throughout the day. Even Josh hung around beyond lunch. And with so many grown Nephilim, each of us with the appetite of a horse—with the exception of Seth and Derik who matched several horses—there was a lot of food being prepared throughout the day.
The first day or two after my verbal lashing from Derik, we barely spoke or acknowledged one another. Until he’d handed my ass to me. He volunteered to spar with me, reverting back to hands only combat. He had me panting, flat on my back within seconds.
He reached his hand out and I swatted it away. Derik took that as a challenge and wrapped his hand around my swinging wrist, hauling me to my feet.
“I could’ve gotten up myself.” I huffed, as I dusted myself off.
“I know. But I wanted to help you up. And honestly apologize for what I said. It was kinda harsh.” He ran his fingers through his shortened, shaggy brown hair.
“It might’ve been harsh but do you honestly regret what you said?”
Derik chewed on his lip for a moment. “No, I guess not. But I could’ve been nicer about it.”
“If you don’t regret it, then don’t apologize. It’s fine. Otherwise, when it’s for something you truly mean, it won’thold as much weight behind the apology.” We walked to the edge of Seth’s house, each grabbing a water.
“Where’d you hear that?” Derik asked as he sipped from his bottle.
I shrugged. “I heard it from an old teacher of mine. I used to apologize so much that she started taking points off of my assignments each time I would apologize unnecessarily.”
“Huh, sounds kinda extreme.”
I shrugged my shoulders. “Maybe, but it worked.”
Things had calmed down between the two of us since then and that was the end of it.
