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“No, I didn’t know that Ethan. But I never intended to marry him. We were dancing, having fun.”
“Just be careful.”
I wanted to turn and snap at him. I wanted to tell him that Ty wasn’t the one I needed to be careful around. It was Ethan that had become more dangerous to me than anyone else. So I didn’t turn around. I kept my eyes forward and kept dancing.
My silence was all he needed to change the subject.
“How have you been? I miss you.”
“I miss you too,” I said softly, suddenly wanting to cry. I didn’t want to miss him the way I did. I could handle missing him as a friend, but I missed him as a lover. I missed our weekend together. I missed making love.
“Hey,” Ethan’s voice got as soft as the music would allow it. He pulled me closer and put his mouth to my ear, “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know,” I shook my head. “It's been a crazy couple of weeks.”
“Anything you need to talk to me about?”
“No, I don’t want to talk about anything. I just want one more dance, then I want to go back to my date.”
The music suddenly slowed to a soft country song and the Oklahoma girl in me smiled. Ethan pulled me against him, his hard chest flush against my back. He wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his chin on my shoulder.
I didn’t bother pulling my dress down. Didn’t feel necessary with him.
We started to sway to the song. It didn’t take me long and I was right where I knew I wanted to be. I was right back to that hotel in New York. I was safe. I was content. I was happy.
I could feel Ethan’s breath on my neck. His breathing had gotten heavier even though our dancing had slowed.
Wanting to break the spell I was falling under, I took a deep breath and sighed, “You know your pitching has been sucking, right?”
His chest started vibrating with a laugh. He was pitching so bad, I was surprised he found it funny. He always took his craft so seriously.
“I am sucking bad. But I am so fucking happy you know that.”
“I’ve been watching,” I said quietly.
“Good,” he smiled against my neck and kissed it with a peck. “I will try to do better on Sunday. Deal?”
“You are always trying to do better. You need to fix the root of the problem.”
“I don’t think I can.”
“Do you know what the problem is?”
“Yep.”
“What?” I started to turn and ask him. This was a normal conversation for us and something that was important to him. I wanted to help him and talk him through it. But he held me tight so I couldn’t turn.
“I will figure it out, Maddy. Don’t worry about me.”
“I always will.”
He didn’t respond, just continued to hold me and sway us back and forth. The lights on the dance area were dim, but I could see the VIP area from where I was. I was sure they could see down at us as well. It's how Ethan saw me and knew to come down.
I didn’t see Ty, but I didn’t really care if he could see me. He knew Ethan and I were close. All the other guys could back us up on our friendship. I just wanted to keep this moment. Ethan may have just been acting as a friend but I was feeling him so deeply. I was almost addicted to the high he gave me.
Ethan growled a little into my ear and brought my thoughts back to him. The song was ending but he wasn’t pulling away. He stopped moving and held still.
Too still.
