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“Maddy, you are my greatest success in this life. My most treasured gift. From the moment I set eyes on you; I loved you. I knew I would love and protect you until my dying day, and I will. Wherever you are, whoever you’re with, however old you are, that, is my promise to you.” I kissed her forehead, already dreading the days she wouldn’t be around for me to do this, yet also wanting her to soar. “I love you, Madeline.”
“I love you, too,Dadand thank you for being my dad.”
“Anytime sweetheart, anytime. Now,” I said, brushing her hair from her face, “get some sleep.”
She snuggled down under the duvet. “Thank Maya for the chocolate for me, it really helped.”
I gave her a wide smile, glad that it had and glad that Maya had known exactly how to help my little girl. It just proved that she was made for me.
Chapter Sixty-Six
Maddy
Emma’s hand tightened in mine as Liv linked my arm, the school gates a couple of feet in front of us. There, leaning against the wall, in his usual spot, drawing hard on a cigarette, was Zak.
“He looks like shit,” Emma announced.
“He looks like he’s been crying.” Liv added, tugging on my arm. “I think you should listen to what he’s got to say.”
“Liam said he’s adamant that he isn’t back with her and that he hasn’t seen her since we all went to London, or that he didn’t post that photo.”
“Yes, well, I know what I saw.” I bit down on my lip desperately trying not to cry. Just the sight of him made me want to sob. He looked terrible—like Liv said, he looked like he’d been crying, or at least not sleeping.
“Just speak to him,” Emma urged.
As we moved closer, Zak pushed off the wall, stamping down on the cigarette. “Mads, please,” he begged, holding out hishand. “You have to believe me. I did not post that picture. I am not still seeing Connie. I swear to you.”
“I know what I saw, Zak, so if you didn’t post it, who did?”
“I don’t know, I have no idea. Connie, maybe?”
“How the hell could she do it? Unless, of course, you were with her and let her have your phone.”
Emma cleared her throat. “Come on Liv, let’s go.” She hugged me and whispered, “We’ll see you in assembly. Just listen to him.”
“See you in while,” Liv added as she uncurled her arm from around mine.
And there I was, alone with Zak, staring at me with red-rimmed eyes, swallowing hard so that his Adam’s apple bobbed.
“You look awful,” I told him, giving him a sweeping gaze from head to foot.
“I feel awful. I’ve hardly slept and I…” he ran a hand over his face and released a long, exhausted breath. “Why wouldn’t you answer my calls?”
“Why do you think?” I shook my head in disbelief. “I’m grieving my best friend, and then I see a picture of you and your ex on your Insta. Posted only yesterday. Why would you do that, Zak? If you’re back with her, that’s the fucking shittiest way of telling me.”
Looking over his shoulder at everyone milling around us, he groaned and then took my hand in his. “We need to get out of here.”
I stood my ground, planting my Doc Martens firmly on the pavement. “No, Zak. We have Ana’s assembly in half an hour, or don’t you care about that either? You know, like you didn’t care that she walked off from the party.”
“That’s not fair.”
“No, it’s not fair that she’s dead. That’s the most unfair thing in the world.”
“Right,” he said in a no-nonsense tone. “We’re going to talk.”
He gripped my hand harder and marched me away from the gates towards the bus shelter across the road. There was one girl in there, searching through her bag.
“Do you mind leaving?” Zak asked, his usual well-mannered self. “We need some privacy.”
