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With a sigh, I closed my eyes, willing sleep to come.
As I drifted off, my last thoughts were of Aria – her smile, her kindness, the way she made me feel like I belonged. In this world we found ourselves in, she had become a valuable person to me. And even if she never saw me as more than a friend, I knew I would do anything to protect her.
After all, that's what friends do. Right?
But deep down, in a part of my heart I was afraid to examine too closely, I hoped for more. In a realm of dragons and destiny, perhaps even a disgraced fae trickster could find love.
29
ARIA
The knock on my door came just as I was trying to process the events of the night. My dragon, still alert from the attack, perked up at the sound. I knew who it was before I even opened the door. Chris would’ve heard about the attack, word spread quick in these halls.
As I opened the door, the sight of his anxious face made my heart clench with guilt. His eyes, usually warm and inviting, were clouded with concern and a hint of hurt that I knew I had caused.
"Aria, are you okay? I heard about the attack. Damn vampires, bloodsucking fucks,” Chris said, his voice strained as his eyes scanned me for any signs of injury. His hands twitched at his sides, as if fighting the urge to pull me into a protective embrace.
I nodded, forcing a small smile that felt brittle on my face. "I'm fine, Chris. Really. My dragon... it protected me." As if on cue, my little defender chirped softly from its perch on my bed.
Relief flooded Chris's features, his shoulders sagging slightly as the tension left them. But the reprieve was short-lived. I could see the lingering hurt in his eyes, the questions that burned behind them. The hurt I had caused. The questions I wasn't sure I could answer.
"I'm glad you're safe," he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. Then, with a deep breath, as if steeling himself, he added, "But Aria, about Ossian..."
The name hung in the air between us. I felt my cheeks flush, memories of my encounter with the vampire flashing unbidden through my mind. The guilt intensified, settling in my stomach like a lead weight.
I took a deep breath, knowing this conversation was inevitable but dreading it all the same. "Chris, I... I need to explain. Ossian asked for my help. He was hurt, and I wanted to help him, considering everything we're going through. It just... took its own turn. I didn’t know feeding could cause that…”
The words sounded hollow even to my own ears. How could I explain the intensity of what I'd felt, the connection that had sparked between Ossian and me? How could I make Chris understand when I barely understood it myself?
Chris's brow furrowed, confusion and pain warring in his expression. His next words came out in a rush, as if he couldn't hold them back any longer. "I don't understand, Aria. The mate bond... it can't be wrong. Normally, when a wolf finds their mate, the other person doesn't feel anything for anyone else. It's just... us. It's supposed to be just us."
The raw emotion in his voice made my heart ache. I wanted to reassure him, to tell him that what we had was special and unique. But I couldn't lie. Not to him, and not to myself. The truth was, my feelings were a tangled mess that I couldn't begin to unravel.
"Maybe it's because I'm human," I suggested weakly, grasping at straws. "Maybe the rules are different for me. I don't... I don't know how any of this is supposed to work."
Chris's eyes narrowed slightly. His voice was low, almost pained when he spoke again. "You didn't say you felt nothing for Ossian."
It wasn't a question. The realization in his tone made me flinch. I looked away, unable to meet his gaze, feeling like the worst kind of person. Our dragons, sensing the tension, were watching us intently. My little one chirped softly, as if trying to offer comfort.
"Aria," Chris said, drawing my attention back to him. His voice was gentle but insistent. "Do you... do you want to be my mate?"
The question caught me off guard, making my breath catch in my throat. It was so direct, so full of hope and fear and longing. "How could I know that?" I asked, my voice tinged with frustration and a hint of panic. "Isn't it a sealed deal, like marriage or something? How can I make that kind of decision when everything is so... so crazy?"
He nodded solemnly, his eyes never leaving mine. "It is. Once the bond is completed, it's for life. It's the most sacred thing for a werewolf."
The weight of his words settled over me like a heavy blanket, threatening to suffocate me. The enormity of what he was asking – what he was offering – was almost too much to comprehend.
"Chris, that's... that's too much to think about right now," I said, my voice shaking slightly. "With everything that's going on, the end of the world stuff... How can I even consider something so permanent when I don't know if we'll survive the Void?”
"I know," he said, his voice gentle but tinged with urgency. "But Aria, that's exactly why we need to think about it. If the world does end, if we fail... I want to have been with my mate. Tohave experienced that bond fully. Don't you want that? To know that kind of love, that kind of connection, even if it's just for a little while?"
His words painted a picture of a love so deep, so all-encompassing, that it made my heart ache with longing. The thought of facing the end without having lived fully, without having loved completely, was a terrifying one. But the idea of committing myself so absolutely, especially when my heart was so conflicted, was equally daunting.
"I understand that," I said softly, trying to keep the tremor out of my voice. "I do, Chris. But I'm just not comfortable with that right now. It's all so much, so fast. I need time to figure things out."
Disappointment flashed across his face, quickly replaced by determination. He nodded, respect in his posture even as pain lingered in his eyes. "Okay," he said. Then, before I could react, he leaned in and kissed me.
The kiss was gentle yet passionate, full of longing and hope and a hint of desperation. It spoke of promises and possibilities, of a future that could be ours if only I'd reach out and grasp it. When he pulled away, he sucked in a sharp breath, his eyes searching mine.
