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“Do you mean the human?” Artemis asked. “Or are you talking about other business?”
“Either way, it’s my business, isn’t it?”
Artemis frowned. “You’re not usually like this. What’s bothering you?”
“I’m no different than usual,” I said.
“You are. You’re angry. Irritated. Something about you feels… dark.” Her frown deepened. “What have you been doing?”
“Nothing,” I said.
“Ash…”
“Could you just leave me alone? I don’t mean disrespect, I’m just… I’m tired. I want to go to my tree and sleep.”
Artemis looked like she wanted to say something, but she only nodded.
“Thanks,” I said, and walked past her.
“You know you can talk to me, whatever it is,” she said. “I’ve always been here.”
She was right. She was the one who’d pulled me back when I’d given up my immortality for Ava. If anyone wanted to be there for me, it was Artemis. I appreciated the goddess, but I didn’t want her to know everything I was doing. I didn’t want her to be disappointed about the bond, and I couldn’t tell her I was bending the rules to leave this life behind.
She would disapprove of the former. She would be furious about the latter.
Either way, I was a big boy and could look after myself. I didn’t need goddesses babysitting me, no matter how good their intentions.
“Sleep well, Ash,” she said gently. “Look after yourself. You’re more precious than you realize.”
I waved over my shoulder at her, shrugging off her words, but my stomach twisted. I was playing with fire, and I had to be very careful that I didn’t get burned.
ChapterNineteen
Lorraine
When I woke up, the air was alive on my skin. There was no other way to explain it—the atmosphere felt like it was a being with a life of its own.
I sat up in bed, rubbed my arms, and shivered. “Ash?” I called into the quiet cabin.
No answer.
I slipped out of bed, and the wooden floor creaked under my bare feet. I shivered, rubbing my hands along my arms where goosebumps had broken out. Until now, the weather had been sunny and warm, and I hadn’t felt cold at all. Today, the light that fell through the cramped windows was dim, almost apologetic in its existence.
The cabin was empty. Despite Ash spending more time with me here, he wasn’t here now, and my stomach twisted. I patted my thighs, looking for a phone in my pocket. I stilled when I realized I was still wearing my oversized T-shirt, so I had no pockets—and no phone. Out here, I was completely isolated from reality, and there was no way to reach anyone.
Not that I would have been able to reach Ash either. He didn’t seem to have a phone. Everyone and everything here seemed stuck in another time where modern technology didn’t exist. It was almost as if I existed in a different realm.
My throat tightened, and my chest grew heavy, as if something big was resting on it. I struggled to breathe. This wasn’t possible, right? I couldn’t be in a different reality. I was just…
I had no idea where I was. The last thing that had seemed remotely normal was the truck I’d been put in when Oscar had sold me. After that, when I’d fallen out of the truck and run into the woods, everything had become a blur.
I pushed my hands into my hair and focused on my breathing. I sucked air through my nose slowly, held it for three counts, and let it out through my mouth again. I focused on the feel of the air passing through my nose and mouth until my breathing was slow enough that I wasn’t at risk of hyperventilating.
“It’s going to be fine,” I told myself. “You’re seeing things, feeling things that aren’t real because you’re caught up and completely alone.”
I’d meant to talk myself down from the ledge, but that hadn’t helped. It only reminded me that everything was wrong, I was alone, and there was nothing I could do to change it.
The atmosphere shifted. The clouds moved away from the sun, and light fell into the windows, brightening up the cabin. But I still felt trapped. I felt like something had wrapped itself around my throat and squeezed.
