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“I want you to figure out what the hell you want and be happy with it,” Rowan said. “You’re in pain, and it’s pretty shitty to see you fight through it all every damn day for the rest of eternity. I know you’re a stubborn SOB and you won’t listen to me, so maybe a goddess can set you straight.”
I clapped him on the back. “Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”
Rowan shrugged. “Just so we’re clear… I think this is the epitome of self-rejection, and I’m not a supporter.”
I sighed. “After three centuries of trying to deal with it and failing, I think I’ve earned the right to look for a different answer. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, right?”
“I don’t know, man… I always thought the definition of insanity was getting close enough to a human woman that you can get all riled up as you are.”
I stared at him, shocked.
Rowan burst out laughing. He was fucking with me again. I bared my teeth and jumped on him, wrestling Rowan to the ground. I had a weight and power advantage over him, and he laughed and cried out as I practically buried his face in the ground before letting him up.
As much as he was a pain in the ass, he was a good friend.
He was probably the only thing I would miss about being a drus.
I had to make sacrifices no matter what choice I made. It was a pity, but no one could have the best of both worlds, and having only the best of one world was far better than to have the worst.
ChapterNine
Lorraine
The forest was alive around me. The trees moved and swayed as I ran, watching me. I screamed. Something was chasing me, but they wouldn’t help me. Why were they just watching?
“I told you magic is real,” Cat said.
I snapped my head around as I ran. She was sitting on the couch, watching me run.
“It’s not real,” I panted. “Those are just stories they made up.”
“They’re not just stories,” Cat said. “If you don’t believe in it, why are you running?”
My steps faltered. Why was I running? I looked over my shoulder, but there was nothing but darkness behind me. A moment ago, that darkness had been alive, an entity in its own right, ready to devour me. Now, the darkness was nothing more than the absence of light.
“Cat?” I asked.
But my sister was gone.
I spun around, looking in every direction. I was stuck in the forest, the trees tall around me, so tall that I couldn’t see their leaves in the darkness above. The forest grew thicker and thicker around me until I was trapped.
The trees looked down at me. The sound of metal on metal sounded somewhere in the distance. What was going on?
“Lorraine?” my mom’s voice said.
“Mom?” I cried out and spun around, trying to figure out where the voice was coming from.
“Hey, sugar pie,” my dad said. “Why don’t you come with us?”
“Where are you?” I asked. Their voices seemed to come from all around me, and I didn’t know where to go to find them. “Mom? Dad?”
The sound of a crash again. I knew what it was this time. It was a car, ripping into another car. Glass shattered, bones broken.
“Mom!” I screamed.
The darkness grew thicker again, and I struggled to breathe. My chest was tight, and my breath rasped in and out of my lungs. I breathed faster and faster, trying to get air, but my lungs wouldn’t use the oxygen I gave them.
Feeling lightheaded, I pressed the heel of my hand against my temple. My head throbbed painfully. The sound of the accident died away. My parents’ voices were nothing more than a memory now.
